JOAN’S 2013 NEW YEAR’S BLOG - December 31, 2012/January 1, 2013

It is not easy to write a New Year’s blog when one is an Alzheimer Spouse. Looking ahead to the new year, most people in our age brackets ( over 50 in most cases)  make plans to improve their lives – take better care of their health by giving up smoking and poor eating habits; joining a gym or commit to daily walks. They plan to take better care of their finances; take whatever trips they can afford whether it is a cruise around the world or short in-state road trips. They plan to enjoy their adult children, grandchildren, and most of all, enjoy the time they have with their spouse.

We Alzheimer Spouses have little time to care for our own health, regardless of the admonitions of the care professionals. We have little or no time to devote to exercise. Our finances, if we have any left, are allocated to our spouses’ increasing care needs; and traveling with a spouse with Alzheimer’s Disease is by no means a rest. It is simply taking our work with us to another place.

What positives do we as Alzheimer Spouses look forward to in the new year?  Although many of you are tired of hearing it, I must reiterate what I have been preaching and living by for at least the last 3 years – “Do it sooner rather than later”. Nothing has served me better or made a more positive influence in my life as an Alzheimer Spouse than planning ahead EARLY.
In last year’s New Year’s Blog, I told you that moving into Independent Living and placing my husband in Day Care “sooner” than I thought I needed either, were two of the best decisions I made. I cannot imagine living now without the maintenance, driving, cleaning, and food services I receive in my Independent Villa. I cannot imagine how much more stressed I would be, or how bored and listless Sid would be, without Day Care.

In 2012, I applied for Medicaid services for Sid sooner than I thought he needed them, and by the time he was approved, we both needed them desperately. His physical disability renders him incapable of showering himself. I am physically incapable of having him lean on me for support in the shower. We would both be in deep trouble without the aide Medicaid provides to do that job.

I never thought that he was ready for overnight respite care, but this year, I placed him in it for a week, so I could have a stress free vacation – Another excellent “sooner rather than later” decision, as it gave me the strength to deal with my father’s final decline and death.

The best piece of advice I can give to all Alzheimer Spouses in 2013 is to PLAN AHEAD; PLAN EVERYTHING BEFORE YOU THINK YOU NEED IT; DO EVERYTHING BEFORE YOU THINK YOU NEED IT. “ SOONER RATHER THAN LATER”. You will not be sorry. I surely have not been.

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL.

IN MEMORIAM - Let us not forget those of our members who lost spouses/partners to Alzheimer’s Disease in 2012:

BLN – partner – January 2012

Jlj – husband – January 2012

Moorsb – wife – February 2012

DickS – wife – February 2012

Bama – husband – February 2012

Zibby – husband – April 2012

Carolyn – husband – April 2012

AngelB – husband – April 2012

Barbra – husband – April 2012

Ladyneedsluck – husband – April 2012

Bella – husband – May 2012

Ocallie36 – husband - May 2012

Weejun – husband – May 2012

Sylvia – husband – May 2012

Brooke – husband – May 2012

Abby – husband – May 2012

Kelly5000 – husband Gary – June 2012

Carosi – husband – July 2012

Terry 54 – husband – July 2012

PrisR – husband Don – August 2012

Jean21 – husband – August 2012

Starling - husband - August 2012

JudithKB – husband Jim – August 2012

Georgestreit – wife – September 2012

Frankswife – husband Frank – September 2012

Moon - husband - October 2012

Flo39 – husband – October 2012

GrannyD – husband – October 2012

Janny – husband Tony – December 2012

Lori – husband – December 2012

If I have inadvertently omitted anyone, please let me know, and I will add the name immediately.

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©Copyright 2012 Joan Gershman
The Alzheimer Spouse LLC
2010 All Rights Reserved
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