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    • CommentAuthorRodstar43
    • CommentTimeSep 12th 2017 edited
     
    If I even go out of the room for a minute I get a "are you ok?" If I Am out out of her suite at the hospital our son or daughter in law needs to be with her. She gets perinoid if I am on the computer too long. I can not do anything for or by myself. It is a 24/7-365 task. Her memory is in minutes.
    We live in an assisted living facility, but might as well be in the desert.
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      CommentAuthormary75*
    • CommentTimeSep 12th 2017 edited
     
    I know from experience just how difficult and frustrating this stage is. Somehow, you will live through it. The disease will progress to its next stage, which can be easier on you. Do whatever you can to maintain your own health and sanity in the meantime. It sounds like you need a break. Can you get away for a few days? She can and should be taken care of by others. She won't like it, but you are important, too.
    • CommentAuthorbhv
    • CommentTimeSep 12th 2017
     
    My DH stalks me. Most of the time I ignore him. If I get him to leave the room it only lasts about 30 seconds. He jumps out of my way when he stands in the kitchen now because I just scowl at him. Fortunately he doesn't look over my shoulder when I am on the computer or tablet. My friend, Dave, had that problem with his wife. He made me swear not to mention Alzheimers in an email because, like my DH, she was unaware that she had a problem. Horrifically he died before she did! Must have been a heart attack cause we didn't know anything was wrong with his health. So find a way to take care of yourself. Even in assisted living you can hire someone to sit with her so you can go somewhere by yourself.

    Have you seen our thread about the cottage on the lake? It is an imaginary world that has been a life saver for many of us. I will post something there so it will come to the top for you. We have a Christmas Lodge too. We will all spend a lot of time there when the holidays come.
    • CommentAuthorRodstar43
    • CommentTimeSep 12th 2017 edited
     
    I have to watch it on the computer. My wife will purposely sneak up to look over my shoulder. I have to use desktop less. Even now, I am using my left pointer finger on a kindle. The "dumb" phone is slow. In October, one of my twin daughters is flying out to visit. Some reprivive. Even then I will have to text her when mom gets out of sorts. My tendency is to protect them. The other twin visits in December. For 50+ year olds they are quick but, they get surprised. I talked with my psychiatrist, yes, I'm not afraid to get my marbles counted and take meds. To deal with this AD problem with serious daily pain is a challenge.
    My thanks to. bhv and Mary75* for your interest in this area of dependence that I believe is different with with a spouse. Did not feel the Same as with my mother. I need time alone in my room by myself. I need to take care of some business. I like being alone. I don't get that at all, but going to work on getting some feel time.
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      CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeSep 12th 2017
     
    My husband is not that bad - yet. But even though I am on the computer most of the day at night after he goes to bed is my time. I use to stay up until 1am but now that I have to get up for his day care 3 days a week, my internal clock is waking me up by 7:30 even days I don't have to. Now my new kitty wakes me up sometimes as early as 5:30 telling me time it is to play!!
    • CommentAuthorRodstar43
    • CommentTimeSep 14th 2017
     
    Being careful about what you write is. Just not fun. Especially with left fore finger. And I am right handed. Just keeping up regular communications is hard. It is bad enough with bad pain but, with depression too. Maintaining this pace would be hard at 30 much less 74. Oh well, one day at a time.