As I mentioned in my last blog posted on this message board, I do not have my laptop with my web design software with me, so I cannot post anything on the home page. This is the Thanksgiving message that would have been on the home page.
Last year at this time, when I was making my annual trek to my sister’s home in Chicago for the Thanksgiving holiday, I was thinking – This is the second year that Sid is in the nursing home. In what condition will he be next year when I travel? Will he be much worse? Will he have forgotten who I am? Little did I realize that he would be gone 7 months later.
So here I am, a widow of 5 months, freezing my Florida rear end off in snowy Chicago for the month of November, with no one at home to worry about, and trying to put on a smiling face in the midst of unbearable grief, so as not to ruin everyone else’s holiday.
It has been a very rough year here at The Alzheimer Spouse, as an unusually high number of our spouses have died this year. One right after the other. So many of us are in the depths of grief. But it is Thanksgiving, and it is my tradition to ask that we all be grateful for what is good in our lives. We are not refugees fleeing the horrors of war with nothing but the clothes on our backs, dragging our exhausted, frightened children with us. Most of us have warm homes, at least some family and friends, and a table replete with food. For that, we should all be thankful.
I ask that you try to focus on at least one element of your life for which you can give thanks. As much as my heart hurts, I am thankful that I had 36 wonderful years with the love of my life, before Alzheimer’s Disease invaded the next 9 years. And I will forever be thankful that he never forgot me, right up to his last breath. I guess with Alzheimer’s Disease, I cannot ask for more than that.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL OF YOU AND YOUR FAMILIES.
I am thankful for my youngest DD and SIL here with me for the next 10 days. Thanksgiving at my sisters house and a trip next month to older DD and family for an early Christmas. So much to be thankful for.
And most of all, this wonderful site, filled with good friends and our dear Joan. (((Hugs)))
What a wonderful idea. Each of can focus on and tell what we are thankful for.
As for myself, I am thankful that I've found a place where I can live out the balance of my life without being a burden to my family and friends and can be happy.....thinking that I can still be of some value in this world.
I'm thankful to be me. This has been a riveting story so far leading me into places I never imagined both good and bad. I became self aware at the age of three throwing up my insides over the side of a boat in the middle of an ocean. It's been such an absorbing ride since then in so many rich ways I couldn't begin to capture it. I don't forget the pains and the heartaches or the anxiety or howling at the moon in agony. All things I have ever been move in and live with me the rest of my life. I should do something because there isn't that much time left they advise. Exactly, I agree, leaning back against the tree in the thick shade. Exactly. Wait...who is that singing? Jimmy Crickett teaching Dumbo about life...when you wish upon a star...hear him?...doesn't matter who you arrreee...
Joan, A great message. Hopefully this time next year you will have arrived at some peace. I am also a widow of almost 5 months, and many days I have felt like a ship lost in the ocean – he was my anchor. Although he was in a nursing home for about 16 months, I saw him every day, and it is like a physical pain not having him in my life. But we were fortunate to have had good husbands, and we have to be thankful that we had the years we did. We have to remember that. George, you are such a positive and giving person. It’s great to hear that you are happy in your new home. Happy Thanksgiving to all.
This is a wonderful reminder for Thanksgiving. My DH will be placed on Saturday after Thanksgiving so I am thankful to have this holiday with him at home and surrounded by family. I am thankful all our children, son-in-law, daughter's fiancé and new twin grandbabies will all be here and we will all be able to spend time together. I am thankful that I will not be alone to handle the placement and will have the support of family. I am thankful for the years me and DH had together that he was still MY DH, my "baby". I'm thankful for my beautiful children that my DH fathered. I am thankful that my DH was able to walk at least one of his 3 daughters down the aisle and see and hold his first grandchild which ended up being two grandchildren, twin boys!
I am thankful I found this site and that there is hope for life after alz. HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL!!!
I am grateful for my friends and family and especially my health. I am grateful I survived this experience. I am not the Same person and it will take a while to figure out who,I am now. My husband loved his family and knew me up,until the end when tho communication was gone. I am thankful for that. Happy holiday to all.
I'm grateful for good health -- far better than I deserve -- that allows me to continue enjoying the "good life" on this beautiful home place that former DW Frances and I created together after retirement. Her imprint is still everywhere, and I treasure that. She would have loved the deer herd that new wife Joyce and I now watch every late afternoon right outside our windows. And I'm grateful that Joyce's kids have begun taking a more active role in her life, and that my own kids are loving and supportive.
I am thankful for this site and all of you wonderful people. You help me get through each day. I am thankful that life although tough now has been good with a lot of love, laughter, good friends, and good times to remember.
Like Joan, I'm thinking that I could be a refugee fleeing from my bombed-out home with just the clothes on my back. But I doubt I would survive as a refugee; I would not get very far on my arthritic knee. And even if I could hobble to safety, I would never leave my husband. But here I am, sitting in a quiet sunny room, typing a note to friends, knowing that my husband is a few miles away playing games that he likes, or being entertained by a singer, or petting a service dog, and that he will smile and kiss me when I see him later. So much has been lost but so much still remains.
I am thankful for my home, my family, friends, church, this site, that I have leaned on for years now thru my Alzheimer journey with my spouse of 45 yrs. I'm thankful for my health, and ability to still be there for my husband, although he is now in nsg home. I'm very blessed!
Just thankful for simple things and small pleasures, really. Thankful that the house interior painting is almost done...that my Harney Hot Cinnamon Spice tea is just as good this year as it was last winter...that I am learning some new, evocative Christmas songs from medieval times, that I'm getting my current book reviews written amidst all the chaos, and that the moon outside is beautiful, glimmering and shimmering like silver in the night sky.
And I'm thankful for all the people on this site who have supported me and saved my life with wisdom, kindness, practical common sense, virtual hugs, and much, much care in all kinds of ways through some of the darkest days of my life. You not only helped me, you helped Larry...with expertise that even the professionals couldn't match. There aren't enough words--there aren't Any words-- to express my gratitude and how much this site and the people here mean to me.
I am thankful that we've had the means to care for dh at home for the past 7 years and that he has lived much longer than originally estimated. I am grateful that although his speech is very limited, he still knows me, knows that I'm his wife and he still loves me.
I am very thankful to have the love and support from my sister...she is the only family member who visits and helps whatever way she can. Her presence in my life is priceless.
And I will be forever thankful to Joan and all of you, past and present who were/are here to help guide me, offer emotional support, common sense, practical advice and solutions for just about every challenge I've faced with this horrible disease and the friendship and support from "strangers" when those that we know have left. As Elizabeth* said, there aren't any words to really express my gratitude.
Just wanted to stop in to say that I am thinking of all you guys still on the front lines of the AD war. You are not forgotten! Some of us have moved on to the loneliness of a holiday without our loved one. I, for one, have the peace and assurance of knowing that he is in the presence of the Almighty. That gives me comfort. Sigh...hard day! But, I have the rest of you on my heart and pray you are able to enjoy at least some part of this day with your loved ones. Hard day for you all too!