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      CommentAuthorJudithKB*
    • CommentTimeAug 23rd 2012 edited
     
    Hospice Dr. and Nurse were just here. The doctor has taken my darling Jim off all medications. Gave
    me a schedule of administering morphine and ativan.

    He has a temp. (could be infection). He was in a state of agitation from 2:00 yesterday afternoon
    until 10:00 p.m. yesterday evening and hospice nurse was here and gave him medications (morphine and ativan) and couldn't get him under control for hours.... He was in constant motion in his bed for hours...was terrible.

    My daughter and son are on there way here and will spend the night. I am doing better then I expected
    because I knew this was coming and have heard from all those that have gone before me and this
    wonderful site that has given me the strength to go this last mile. Thank you all from the bottom of
    my heart....
  1.  
    Judith, I am so very sorry. I pray for strength for you to get through this and for calm and peace for Jim.
  2.  
    When it rains it pours...
    Sorry Judith, and hang in there.
  3.  
    this is shocking. Hang on Judith, be strong, and may the angels of peace be there for both of you. I am so sorry.
  4.  
    Judith-even though we know how the story ends it is never easy. My love and thoughts are with both of you as well as your family.
    •  
      CommentAuthormary75*
    • CommentTimeAug 23rd 2012
     
    Dear Judith, you are all in my heart and prayers.
    • CommentAuthorWolf
    • CommentTimeAug 23rd 2012
     
    My god. I'll be thinking of you and checking. And PrisR. What a disease that we must face such an end to such a long suffering.
  5.  
    Yes, Judith,,stay strong..we are all here to help hold you...This indeed has been a sad day..
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      CommentAuthorAnchor20*
    • CommentTimeAug 23rd 2012
     
    JudithKB, I will be praying for both you and Jim during this time you are going thru. Continue to take care of yourself during this and know that you have done all you could for Jim.

    JimB
    • CommentAuthorElaineH
    • CommentTimeAug 23rd 2012
     
    Judith, like the others, my thoughts & prayers are with you & Jim.
    • CommentAuthorms. magic
    • CommentTimeAug 23rd 2012
     
    Adding my prayers ... bless you both.
    • CommentAuthorJan K
    • CommentTimeAug 23rd 2012
     
    Judith,

    May you be given strength and peace as you go through this. We are all thinking of you.
    • CommentAuthorSusanB
    • CommentTimeAug 23rd 2012
     
    My thoughts and prayers are with and Jim as well. My heart to yours.
    •  
      CommentAuthordeb112958
    • CommentTimeAug 23rd 2012
     
    My thoughts and prayers are with you. ♥
  6.  
    Adding my prayers and thought to you too Judith...blessings..♥
    • CommentAuthorJean21*
    • CommentTimeAug 24th 2012
     
    So sorry, Judith. I hope your husbands passing will be peaceful for both of you. God Bless.
  7.  
    Judith, I just went through what you are experiencing now. DH died yesterday morning and, despite the tears and horrible sadness, I'm able to relax knowing that his terrible journey is over. Hang in there. You're going to get through this.
  8.  
    Judith, I am praying for peace for Jim and a quiet peaceful passing. Praying for peace and strenght for you and the children. You have done a great job, it is time to step back and let the angels do their job. Arms around you Phyllis
  9.  
    Judith, I am praying for a peaceful passing.....
  10.  
    My deepest sympathy, Judith. I went through much the same thing three years ago, with morphine and ativan provided by Hospice during my DWs final days, and then peace for her and the beginning of an "after" for me. I wish the same for you.
  11.  
    My prayers too for you. Thankful for hospice - what would it be without them? So sorry it must end this way.
  12.  
    Judith, I am reninded that Gord was like that a couple of days before he passed away. It is so hard to watch and you wish they could rest. Then comes the terrible stillness. My thoughts and prayers are with you. It is such a terrible journey.
    • CommentAuthorLFL
    • CommentTimeAug 24th 2012
     
    Judith, sending prayers our way during this difficult time. I wish peace for both you and your beloved Jim.
    • CommentAuthorAnn*
    • CommentTimeAug 24th 2012
     
    It doesn't seem to matter if you are expecting this .When it happens it is still a shock.
  13.  
    Amen, Ann..
    Arms around all who have and are about to say farewell to their LO...
  14.  
    JudithKB:

    My heart goes out to you. I know you will have all the strength you need for what is in store. Your Jim is so lucky to have you as you were to have him these years.
    •  
      CommentAuthorJudithKB*
    • CommentTimeAug 24th 2012
     
    Thank you all for your supportive comments. You have no idea how helpful this is. I have been reading the comments and it is like my friends have gathered and only you...you and you...all of you know that this is
    something you also will experience or have experience already.


    My darling is very figgety because he was not incontinent and he just can't relax and pee in his diapers...with
    out getting very figgety. He now is sleeping or whatever and I am playing his favorite Elvis disk and this
    darling little smile of his comes on his face every once in awhile. It is worth a million dollars to me and
    I will always remember this special time we are sharing. Don't be afraid of this last adventure you will share with your spouse...it is very private, personal and very, very special.
  15.  
    Oh JudithKB:...My heart goes out to you.
    Tears and prayer for you both..
  16.  
    Such a sweet post, JudithKB. Good memories you are making. Arms around you both.
  17.  
    Sweet memories for you dear lady.
    • CommentAuthorZibby*
    • CommentTimeAug 24th 2012
     
    Be strong and courageous; peace will come like a blanket covering you both.
  18.  
    OH God Judith me too just big tears rolling down. Oh how awesome to see him smile to his music. May the arms of angels of peace surround you both.
  19.  
    Bless you & your darling, Judith, we are with you, feel our strength and caring. Betty
  20.  
    JudithKB, How I admire your strength! You are doing your sweetie proud. I will remember your words!
    • CommentAuthorElaineH
    • CommentTimeAug 24th 2012
     
    Judith you have amazing strength. It's obvious you realize that this too is part of the journey & you are making the most of what time you have left with each other. May you both find peace when the time comes. ((HUGS))
    • CommentAuthordivvi*
    • CommentTimeAug 24th 2012
     
    Judith may you blessed with comfort feelings knowing you did all you could and now its his time for peace for you both. hugs
    divvi
    • CommentAuthorBev*
    • CommentTimeAug 24th 2012
     
    Judith, I'll say an extra prayer for you and your husband tonight. God bless you and help you through this journey.
    • CommentAuthorAmber
    • CommentTimeAug 25th 2012
     
    Gentle breezes for your hubby and your next journey.
    •  
      CommentAuthorJudithKB*
    • CommentTimeAug 25th 2012
     
    Today my Jim is resting peacefully. I am playing Elvis again, but this time it is a tape of Elvis singing his sprituals...I love this tape..it brings Jim and me such peace. Also...Jim always wore a Docker ball cap..his
    hair was thinning...very thin...and he would have worn this cap to bed if I let him. I put it on him this
    morning and he gave me the biggest smile. Never thought I would ever see that big smile again and then out
    of the blue...there is was...Ohhh...How I love this wonderful man. How sweet it was. He has no pain and for that I am grateful

    Friends have stopped by which is nice, but now I am alone with him and it is so quite and peaceful...What
    a blessing that I can have this time alone with him. I can't tell you how glad I am I didn't need to place
    him and he can take his last breath in his home with me.
  21.  
    Judith I am so happy for both of you. A gentle passing at home.
    • CommentAuthorms. magic
    • CommentTimeAug 25th 2012
     
    Judith, I am in tears reading about your sweet moments with Jim.
    Especially the part about the ball cap.

    Bless you both.
  22.  
    Judith...I'm in tears as i read about your last few moments with Jim...
    Blessing to you both..peace for you both now..
  23.  
    Just tears, just love, just prayers,, for you and Jim.
    • CommentAuthorabby* 6/12
    • CommentTimeAug 26th 2012
     
    If it happens for you tonight it seems like it will be much like it was for me. While they meant well, (and this was at the alf) people would come by to say goodbye and to bless him on his journey. Except for the hospice nurse who had control of the meds and who could apprise me of the significance of various clinical signs I got to the point that I just wanted to be alone with him.

    Even after twelve hours of talking and talking and talking-me, not him, I was not yet ready to give up and say that final goodbye.

    I brought a tablet and played music too. I guess you would call it music of the 80's; what we shared and knew together; our wedding song. All this took place while the full moon rose and set.

    His temp would rise and fall as well.

    Judith, you have been beyond wonderful. You are doing all anyone could possibly do. Med issues, home vs alf vs boarding home; respite, aides. You are inspiring, you are honest, and you have helped, me, for one, so very much.

    Not having a magic wand I can only wish you both the best and to have the bittersweet end be as much full of peace and sweet as is possible.
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      CommentAuthorJudithKB*
    • CommentTimeAug 27th 2012
     
    We are still waiting for this to be over. The hospice nurse could not get any reading on her blood pressure machine and I have tried several times with my machine and I cannot get any reading either. It is so sad to see him linger in this state and hope it will be over soon. The nurse believes he had a stroke earlier today and I do too. Will keep you posted.
  24.  
    WE are all here sitting vigil with you, JudithKB....this is so hard on all of you...I think your LO is not in any pain....he is making a transition and perhaps he is just taking his time lingering a little longer with you here in this realm..I am sure he can hear your words of comfort...It must be such a tug of war, seeing what is on the other side and not wanting to leave this side...he will decide in his own time and I sense it will be gentle when he does...Arms around you all.
    • CommentAuthorcassie*
    • CommentTimeAug 27th 2012
     
    We are all still with you Judith, you must be exhausted. Take care and blessings to you both.
    • CommentAuthorZibby*
    • CommentTimeAug 28th 2012
     
    Hugs to you JudithKB. May the vigil waiting for his release not be much longer.
  25.  
    Judith prayers for a peaceful passing
  26.  
    Judith, may you find additional strength to get you through the coming days and weeks. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

    Love,
    Mary*