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    • CommentAuthorandres
    • CommentTimeMar 25th 2012
     
    I'm not sure I know what this really means. Is it a day care program or like a temporary nursing home admission...or what? Is is some sort of formal program?
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      CommentAuthorNikki
    • CommentTimeMar 25th 2012
     
    Hi andres, respite simply means a break from your caregiving. It can be a couple of hours or even weeks.
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      CommentAuthorNikki
    • CommentTimeMar 25th 2012
     
    And yes, it can mean anything from day care, to having someone come to your home, to temporary placement. Anything that gives a caregiver a break is termed respite.
  1.  
    It's a general term for any arrangement you make that allows you a few days or more off from caregiving. It can be a short term facility stay, or it could be hired aides in your home, or it could be a friend or relative.
  2.  
    jinx, almost.
    • CommentAuthorandres
    • CommentTimeMar 25th 2012
     
    thanks all.
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      CommentAuthorNikki
    • CommentTimeMar 25th 2012
     
    Lol Emily :)

    And you are welcome andres
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      CommentAuthorJudithKB*
    • CommentTimeMar 25th 2012
     
    One of the ALF that I checked for my dh provided respite at $120 a day. If needed I might try that for a few days later in the year.
    • CommentAuthorJean21*
    • CommentTimeMar 25th 2012
     
    A couple of the ALF's here charge $150.00 for 30 days!!!!
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      CommentAuthorJudithKB*
    • CommentTimeMar 25th 2012
     
    Wow..that is unreal. That is so much cheaper then for those that are paying thousands of dollars a month.

    I thought the $120 a day was a reasonable amont...but $150 for 30 days....if I could find a place like that I would be using it from time to time. How do they do that for only $5.00 a day?
  3.  
    That can't be right, unless it's one of those come-ons like they have at rental storage units--sign up and get the first month for only $150! No place could provide anything close to good care for $150/month. (Think about it...a night in a Holiday Inn Express is $150, and they aren't taking care of you.)
    $120/day though...based on costs in my area, that is very competitive. I wouldn't quibble with that.
    • CommentAuthorcarosi*
    • CommentTimeMar 25th 2012
     
    I think that's $150 a day for 30 days--still not bad. I had a 5 day in-home respite care provided at about $165 a day--in a facility it would have been about $200 a day.

    Also had 4 hours a month, in-home coverage for me to have a break, during the last 2.5 years.
    • CommentAuthorms. magic
    • CommentTimeMar 25th 2012
     
    I tried to find a place for DH at the end of last year, when he was coming out of almost 3 weeks in a rehabilitation program at the local hospital.
    None of the places around here would take him, as he was bedridden at the time.
    I checked nursing homes and ALFs.
    • CommentAuthorJean21*
    • CommentTimeMar 26th 2012
     
    It is $150 per day for 30 days. Sorry for the goof! BTW neither place never mentioned anything less than 30 days.
  4.  
    My experience with the ALFs in our area is that the respite, or short-term stays they offer are either 30 or 60 days. I think the main use for it is exactly what I'm doing right now--that is, we are on respite status for our first 2 months, which means that I won't have to pay the move-in fee until I'm pretty darn sure this is the right thing.
  5.  
    emily and others--NEGOTIATE on the move-in fee. The bad economy has resulted in lower resident levels for facilities (families are keeping their LO's home longer, they can't afford residential facilities). Even the corporately-owned places have some leeway to negotiate. I live in between two facilities owned by Manor Care--both are about 15 mins away. One is the only ALF in it's area and charges a $3,000 move-in fee. The other is in an area with several competing facilities--they've done away with the move-in fee. Both places are identical, the only difference is the location. Even if a facility won't excuse the move-in fee completely, they may reduce it significantly to fill a room.
    • CommentAuthorandres
    • CommentTimeMar 26th 2012
     
    apart from "move in fees" is there other means testing for how much one pays?
  6.  
    Andres, here in Florida there's a program called R.E.L.I.E.F., which is an acronym for Respite for Elders Living In Everyday Families, and their definition of respite is:
    "It is the 'break' or the 'relief' that a volunteer gives to a caregiver to allow them to rest, to reduce stress, to complete needed tasks of daily living outside the home, and to pursue interests that help them stay connected to friends, church, and life itself in order to preserve their mental and physical health, stability, spirituality, and well being".
    The program is free as far as the caregiver is concerned -- sponsored and partially funded by the Florida Department of Elder Affairs, and administered/funded locally in our area by a county Alzheimer's Foundation. My new wife and I are volunteers in this program, and provide up to four hours per week of in-home respite for caregivers assigned to us, for which we are reimbursed the handsome sums of $4.50 per hour of care and $.37 per mile for travel to/from the care location. We had to undergo screening and quite a bit of training prior to commencing actual respite giving, and have to operate under quite a list of DO'S and DON'T'S -- we don't give medications, we don't lift the client, we don't give baths or help with toileting, we don't help with housework, etc. Basically we're just "companions" who keep an eye on the client and try to keep them safe for the few hours when the caregiver is away.
    Our local county Alzheimer's Foundation also operates three day care facilities called "Joe's Club", and I believe attendance there costs something like $50 per day, noon meal included (I ought to remember -- my DW attended off and on for a few months three years ago).
    I hope you'll be able to find similar services available in your area.
    • CommentAuthorcarosi*
    • CommentTimeMar 26th 2012
     
    andes--Contact your Area Agency on Ageing. They are agooldsource for infoonsevicesin your area. They arranged our in-home help and coverage when I needed medical care and later, respite coverage. Some places they referyou to; some programs they administer.
  7.  
    Thanks Marilyn...the other near-by ALF offered to completely waive the move-in fee, but this seemed to be a "favor" having to do with the manager there knowing my sister and brother-in-law. It wasn't the best choice for Jeff because of the size of the memory care area (that wasn't their main emphasis,) but yes, it's apparently not carved in stone.
    The other thing to know about the daily feels that you are hearing about (whether $120/day, $150/day, whatever,) is that that might just be the cost of staying there. There very well might be another level of daily expenses that have to do with the actual care needed. Around here $200 is kind of normal once it's all totted up.
    • CommentAuthorJean21*
    • CommentTimeMar 26th 2012
     
    The ALF DH will be going to charged $750.00 move in fee, it is usually $2,000.00. I will be paying a little over $3,000.00 a month but there is no extras added on. Maybe because he can still take care of ADL's.
  8.  
    Ah respite.

    I seem to be hitting a dead end on all my attempts. No return calls from VA Social Worker, no one that wants to stay with him even for a good days pay.

    I am giving it up until his next check up with his Neurologist in about 2 months . Then, I am going to INSIST! I have kept copies and records of everything, and if it comes down to it, will seek someone to help me with it.

    Lots of good answers to you questions Andre! Gourdchipper I love that program you are talking about, maybe, we could get something like that started here.
  9.  
    Yesterday, I had a call from the care centre asking if I would like to book in another resite weekend...I was out, she caught me at a bad time sitting in Dr's waiting room. I said not just now, perhaps in a few weeks...what was I thinking!
    While Dh supposedly did have a good time, she said he was unsettled at first...I stressed and worried the whole time. I'm thinking now I should go for it again...am I being too over protective, surely, it can only get better for me with time.
    Here it's $70, gets picked up late Friday afternoon and brought back home Sunday lunch time...so really it's just one full day, two nights
    • CommentAuthorcarosi*
    • CommentTimeMar 26th 2012
     
    Julia--IMHO you should do it as often as it's available. You need the breaks and he will adjust. It will become familiar to him,and as you do it more often, you will become more comfortable with leaving him in other's care. Down the road,should anything untoward happen, putting you out of commission temporarily, he would lkely adjust more easily too.
    • CommentAuthorWolf
    • CommentTimeMar 26th 2012
     
    I strongly recommend the respites too if we can afford them.

    I took my wife to a very advanced state in no small part because I had a 5 hour respite and 3 times 5 hour help in home. That's quite a bit of help and some thought it was a lot; but, you go through 168 hours a week and what I've just described covers 20 hours. I did the other 148 alone and many nights there was little or no sleep. I went over 60 hours without a wink once (so did she).

    Part of the benefit of respite is that once the person gains some of your confidence, you can transfer the burden for that time and not only get some things done, but actually recharge a bit.

    In the last 5 months I had her, I also took extended respite offered by one of the local residences. She stayed there anywhere from 4 to 7 days at a time and that was important to get experience for both of us. Not having her with me is still very hard to accept after years of doing nothing but take care of her - but the respite I did helped me already have some experience with this powerful thing many of us have to do somewhere.
  10.  
    Carosi, in my heart i know I really need the breaks and i need to get used to it..today just now at 9am, it's already started, with the same stuff going on.
    I think I'll ring the centre later and book another respite and see if I can get perhaps 3 days...the one day is just like him going to day care that he does twice a week anyway.