I can't believe it...I tried to post a message here in the wee morning hours. John fell (or rather, slid down the wall) after a trip to the bathroom during the night....one of many every night. He couldn't stop vomiting this dark brown fluid. He has a slight very slight fever. The visiting nurse came yesterday and took blood and urine samples. He stopped eating anything at breakfast...only a portion. My message was cleared. Unbelievable...I am still a member here, apparently. I am in trouble. Tahank you, "friends".
I'm afraid my messages will be cleared soon. I was looking for help when I needed it when this all started to happen. I don't have any one I can call and ask "John's down and sick....NOW what do I do" in the middle of the night. They've taken him away. I'm going to get some decent clothes on, brush my teeth and go to the E.R. I am afraid he won't be coming home. He's somehow forgotten he can walk. SOMETIMES PEOPLE NEED SOME FREAKIN HELP WHERE THEY KNOW TO LOOK!
Before I go....I was reading another comment on another thread....should I insist that his doctors perform a CT, MRI or whatever they do to find out if anything else is going on????? And, like John, SURE ENOUGH, when these people were here, he said he was fine and HAD NO PAIN! I've been listening to him call out and shout and cry all night (and morning) long. I just can't get by on three or four hours of sleeep a night. Sorry. No halo award here. I'll check back here for advice on what to ask about before I leave. So, if you have any real thoughts or suggestions, post before I leave in around 15 min. I know I'm "in your thouoghts", in your "prayers" and thank you. I just need information. THank you BUNCHES for anything I should be asking.
When someone is down and sick in the middle of the night, you call 911 immediately. I would seriously suggest you talk to the social workers at the hospital, inform them of the AD, refer them to his Alzheimer doctor, and they will advise you how to handle the impending situation. Refer all the emergency room doctors to his Alzheimer doctor. Let the professionals handle this.
Jen, I don't have any advice or information on this, but I would just leave him in the hands of the professionals. Let them do whatever they need to do. Now, get yourself together and try to keep calm. Let us know how it goes. Good thoughts are with you today.
Make certain you have his meds listed on a paper so they can see what he is taking. If the dr is good, they should understand that with ad, sometimes no means yes. If dh is calm enough, sometimes they can do testing but ask what the test is for. Make certain it makes sense to you. Bring the name of his dr to refer to. Maybe they will call him/her to get some background info. Lucky you that this happened during the day and during the week when his dr is probably available. In the meantime, I'll pray for a good nights sleep for you. Maybe if they admit him, it will give you some time to regroup. Good luck.
I didn't think I should have called 911, as he didn't "fall", just slid to the floor. Very slight temp. The vomiting stopped. ALWAYS is calling out in pain of one sort or another. He was VERY VERBAL about not wanting to go to the hospital. But, when I couldn't budge him earlier without his hollering in pain, I decided to call 911. Yes, he's in the "hands of the professionals" now. Not as good of care as he was getting here, but at least he will have several people around him to move him when necsessary. He's afraid of going into a nursing home again. That's not what I wanted to happen, either. But, maybe he'll get better and be able to come home?
Go with what the professionals advise. Sometimes what we want(with our heart) isn't what's best. We have to do what's best (with our minds) for our LO.
Going to E.R. now....all else taken care of here for the rest of the day. By the way, if my first, hasty message hadn't been erased, I probably would have gotten the message from someone to call 911. Just didn't seem like a life or death emergency and I've always thought that was what 911 was for. Heck, I've even driven myself to the hospital with a broken leg (left leg) before. Bye. I'll let you know what happens.
Jen, there's no need to speculate at this point about whether John will be able to come home again or not -- you just have to believe that he's in good hands with the professionals and that they'll take care of him in a medically appropriate way. And how are you coming with building that wall and detaching yourself emotionally? HUGS!
I am sure you weren't erased. I have, and I'm sure most of us have experienced doing a big post and hitting the "back to discussions" button instead of the "add your comments" button. So please stop worrying about that. Those buttons are too close for me.
As for John, he's in good hands...in that there are many more hands now to deal with the present situation. Hope all goes well. Take care.
((Jen)) Poor John! I hope they will be able to figure out what is the matter with him. Make sure you let them know the visiting nurse took blood and urine samples. Maybe they can get those results to help diagnose. Please let us know how you both are. ((hugs)) Nikki
Next time you are up in the early hours, you call the hospital or 911 with the symptoms and they will advise you whether or not to have an ambulance sent. People are not on this site 24/7, and can't make those type of decisions for you. When in doubt, you simply call 911. Please don't rely on this site in case of emergencies. You could be waiting a long time for someone to repond to a post made at 5:30 a.m.
If your spouse is on the floor, you are unable to move him, and he can't move himself, as was your case, of course you call 911. You DO NOT go to ANY web site for asisstance. You do NOT need a message from someone to dial 911.
My husband fell and broke his hip about 20 months ago. He said through tight lips, "Don't you DARE care 911." I had tried to lift him up, pull him up and it wasn't working.
I came into the house (he fell in the garage) and called 911, Silly me, I was whispering to the operator. Suddenly it occurred to me, I DON"T NEED TO WHISPER!!! I'm standing up and he can't get to me! Of course, they had to use their "scooper" to slide under him to lift him up to the stretcher. (a 2 piece hard plastic piece that they slide beneath him from two sides..and it interlocks (like fingers) beneath him. Much easier and less painful.
That was a long time ago (in Alzheimer's time) and I was still asking him "is it ok if I .....". Wow! I don't do that anymore. How easy is it to talk to them as if they understand, and get to decide what is best. Jen is way behind most of us on the learning curve of dealing with AD and dementia. I believe that she has even commented, "He was a doctor and therefore knows if his pain is akin to a heart attack". I credit the Clinical Psychologist on my husband's Neurological Team who calls me or we meet together at least once a month. Her time is charged to my husband's care. She has taught me so much, prepared me and encouraged me. I believe tht more than once, her words have come out in my posts here.... I, personally, would have succummed to this disease a long time ago if it was not for Dr.K.
Susan, my DW, long ago when I was still working but coming home for lunch to check on her, fell into the stall shower, knocking out the glass (no breakage) and landing on her back, over the 4" high front 'wall', and had a dark brown liquid running out of her mouth and down the side of her neck. I took it to be stomach acid 'cause it wasn't red. She turned out o.k., but John's case of 'can't stop vomiting' it does look like an entirely different situation. Maybe bleeding, maybe stomach acid? I dunno.
To Jen and Everyone Who Uses This or Any Other Forum,
No website forum is a substitute for medical care. This is specifically stated in the Guidlelines of this and any other website forum. If it is a medical emergency, dial 911. Worry about the repercussions later. Someone who is well into AD, whether a former doctor, lawyer, teacher, psychologist, or any other profession, is not capable of making a medical decision as to whether or not they are having a heart attack or anything else. You don't listen to them. You pick up the phone and call 911.
I said I would stay out of getting mad at someone but her dh is in trouble, she needs to think of him first and not herself, instinct call 911 go with him to the hospital not wait for advice, I feel sorry for John,Jen you have to make your decisions right away not wait till later, sorry, I will now keep my mouth shut. Gail
I also said I would stay out of it, but I can't help but wonder why she was just leaving for the hospital two hours after she posted the EMTs were there.
Please e-mail your comments to her at canton@ntelos.net
We are all aware of the volitility of the situation, and I prefer to keep it off of this forum. You can also respond at http://stuntgirlsownwords.blogspot.com/
Just one thing about calling 911. I think a lot of us don't call as quickly as we should, myself included, and I've dialed 911 on myself more than once in the last 15 years.
My doctor once told me to call 911 to take me to Emergency and I had my husband drive me instead. After all, I could walk. I was wrong. The paramedics do triage on the way to the hospital. If you need to see a doctor at the door, and frankly I did that time, there is one at the door waiting for you.
I was reading a book on caregiving once and the author had been picking her husband who was twice her height and three times her weight off the floor after multiple falls for over a year. One day she couldn't do it and FINALLY called 911 for help. They took one look and sent for a THIRD person to help them with him. Checked him out and took him to the hospital as well, because that is where he belonged. Things change for us so slowly that we don't realize we are doing more than any one person could possibly do.
And it is in some ways worse for StuntGirl than it is for most of us because she was separated from him through no fault of her own for a long time and did not realize just how bad things had gotten when she made her decisions about trying to keep him at home.
I'm sorry. I didn't realize that asking questions and posting my delema and concerns for John was "volitile" as expressed by another. Thank you to those few of you that responded in an acceptable, helpful and adult manner. And thank you, Hildann, for validating my statement. I was NOT asking for advise about IF I should call 911. I figured John was exhausted from his ordeal, out of breath like usual after going to to bathroom, changing clothes....I made him comfortable where he lay down. No trauma, no reason for that kind of concern. Later, when I made my posts, I was looking for advice (read the post) as to what I should be asking for ..... tests, etc. The doctor expects that he has some sort of bleeding issue internallly because of the brown fluid. (telling you this because someone else may need info at another time). They're checking everything out and will most likely keep him thru the weekend. UTI? Maybe. No fever. VERY rapid pulse. A bit dehydrated. Red blood count still extremely low. VERY lethargic when I left. Why do you think I'm not thinking about my husband's welfare? I doubt any AD patient is taken care of as well as John is here at home. By the way, I was lucky to talk to both of his doctors about his conditions, at length. I was also assured that in no way was I remiss about not calling 911 immediately. They both said that too many people call when there is no need and that I used good judgement instead of the usual "knee jerk" reaction. And, no, no one there or here is stupid. Why are my threads always closed? Why don't I get support for my concerns instead of public beatings? I had legitimate questions and was very frightened.....I made the mistake that this is a "support system". Sometimes, some of us need real support. Really. Not chastisement or "there, there's". Please think before hitting that add button. You can do some damage that way. No one will e-mail me directly....only post annonymously here, with catty remarks. Not good or respected.
Also, I don't understand why someone said it was two hours before I left after the EMT's......whose clock are you all on? I was running around doing everything I could to prepare. I was in their way in that narrow hallway. AND I happen to type extremely fast!
Phranque, I agree with all my heart. A message board is like email, it's so easy to say something too quickly, and it's easy for misunderstandings to arise. Let's be kind and supportive, or silent.
Re: 911 My husband had several heart attacks before his "official" diagnosis of AD. The first time I drove him, the hospital is a couple of miles away. However at a busy intersection, I had to stop for a red light and my husband was having difficulty breathing. I was sorry that then that I drove him as I sure couldn't drive and tend to him - and I wouldn't know what to do anyhow.
Now ANYTHING that isn't quite right, I call 911. We are always told that calling is the right decision. They can check him out, keep him and treat him or hopefully send him home with everything being ok and no real emergency.
I don't question it, I don't ask him - I just call. We have a drill - put the pets away, clear the way from the front door to my husbnad. We keep a clear plastic change purse by the door with copies of his meds, and reminder to get the cards we need for checkin.
My husband is 69, he has AD, he has a history of heart problems and he has a history of making real poor decisions that sometime put him in an emergency situation. Like the time he cut part of his finger off, another time going into renal failure, which was a new ailment.I don't have the answers to the complex things that could be happening to him.
I don't care if the EMTs, the hospital staff fuss at me - they never have - or if I get a bill for an unnecessary call . I have never gotten one of those either. But, I don't know what to do - I don't know how to properly assess him and he is going ASAP to where people can do what they are trained for.
I take my cell phone and call my support numbers if I have to wait while he is being treated, having tests, etc.. I have learned that building a support system that I can call on when I need to, is as important as the insurance cards for me.
When all else fails, we have a local Crises line that I have called - I tell them that I am ok, not going to hurt myself or anyone else and that I just need to talk and cry and they listen and it helps me. Probably other people don't need that, but there are times when I get scared in the moment and those resources help me. Also, the Alzheimers 24/7 has been a big help and wonderful resource.
When my husband had his first heart attack,he looked fine at first and said he just had a little indigestion. So, I know now that he isn't going to show how serious his physical situation is and that it will look like it is an emergency.
I don't need to feel it is an emergency to call 911 - I only need to see that something is wrong and is much different than what is "normal" for him. My daughter is a nurse and works in the ER in her community and she always encourages us to go to the ER. She says that people come in with a tooth ache or a boil they have had for a long time and get treated. With the health issues my husband has, I am going to call 911. That way I know I have done all that I can do.
I remember last year, after I had just joined this group, I had a really violent episode. This was one of the first that I had dealt with. I need "ropes, hugs" and advice for dealing with them. I received many, many very supportive comments which were so helpful. I remember one in particular that, rather than being supportive of my feelings and for what I had been through, made me feel like I had done something wrong for holding my ground to keep my life together and not calling the police. I did not feel at the time like my life was in danger. I had just put up with a very hard situation and just needed a shoulder to cry on. I had this same reaction from one of my sisters once. She had told me pretty much that it didn't matter what I wanted that if she heard again that there was trouble that she "would have to do what she would have to do." You can bet your life that whenever she asks how things are going, I say "just fine."
Phranque, thank you for the supportative way you worded this.
In this particular situation, we are dealing with issues behind the scenes that many of you are not be aware of. There are serious legal issues involved that neither this or any other public forum is equipped to deal with. In this case, I have to ask that you respect my wishes and post any and all comments about Stuntgirl's situation on her blog. http://stuntgirlsownwords.blogspot.com/ This is extremely important or I would not be requesting it.
Please understand that I have mental health and legal advisors for this site. I cannot stress how important it is that in this case, comments must be diverted to Stuntgirl's blog.
Since my e-mail is currently not working properly, I have been unable to send a notification to her.
Joang....please do not close my thread. I began posting for the specific reason of finding out some needed information. Odd vomiting, lethargic behavior, sudden failure of my husbands abillity to walk correctly. "Ghost" symptoms that would disappear when I had a nurse or doctor examine him....which happens every other day around here. Is anyone else getting that kind (qualilty) of care, even in a nursing home??? I am ignoring (as best I can) those who have grown to dislike me. They don't even know me, only that I speak from my heart with honesty. I don't berate anyone on this site for whatever they say.....I don't even have a come-back for negative postings (oh, that's what a personal blog is for!). If I have a beef, or even feel defended and commended, I'll try to send that person a personal e-mail and not make it a public scene which some people here seem to feed off of. Please keep my thread open. John's experiencing some strange symptoms that I'm having a hard time finding references to, because (I'm finding) some of his symptoms seem to have NOTHING to do with AD....and maybe some folks here can relate some of their experiences. What makes me such poison? Please let me know if you know something I don't. Might make my life easier. Thanks again (I sent you an e-mail, too...don't worry, it's not a flogging like I've been getting). Jen