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  1.  
    The leaky boat is being replaced by the most luxurious cruise ship starting on June 1.
    This new ship is unsinkable (unlike the Titanic), because new technology made it possible for the caregivers to walk on water, and the same technology was used on the ship.
    It offers the most comprehensive staff of experts in the ad journey.
    Check out the 5 star meals that the caregivers prepare each day...sample all the cocount goodies, coconut shrimp, coconut scampi and coconut zombie drinks with little umbrellas. Sample the tahitian hamburger helper....
    The medical staff comprises of at least 50 neurologists, each with expert advice on special treatment, and more prescription information than is available on the drug information sheets.
    The entertainment staff will keep you laughing throughout the day as they recount their adventures, and there are dedicated crews to help you find missing items. Extra pajamas and nighties are included with every trip.
    The clean up crew is "pristine", and you will not find a smudge anywhere.
    Of course, gambling is a prime entertainment spot, and be sure to check out the high stakes gambling...after all, you may be betting on someone's life.....
    Meals are served 24 hrs a day, with or without utensils, and can be special ordered to accomodate the most sensitive palate.
    Be sure to visit the exercise room, where you can throw things, punch walls, smash furniture and vent your frustrations.
    Lifeboats will also be available for anyone who falls overboard. Our staff will be on constant alert for anyone nearing the rail.
    The sun deck is open from dusk to dawn for those who like to nap or just lay around.
    The swimming pool boasts of 92 degree water, and 15 pool attendants for you ladies. Towels and sun tan lotion are additional.
    The captain of this ship is Joan, and Sid will be the harbor pilot, and he will be allowed to drive anywhere at all.
    Other staff leaders have not been named, and will be assigned as they volunteer.
    Happy Sailing
    • CommentAuthorWeejun*
    • CommentTimeMay 31st 2009
     
    Oh, my goodness I've been sick in bed all day and just came to check the latest news -- I've NEVER been on a cruise so I wouldn't miss this for the world. Put me down for a fancy stateroom!
    • CommentAuthorGail*
    • CommentTimeMay 31st 2009 edited
     
    Do we come with or without our spouses? Humm.....
  2.  
    Package deal...must be accompanied by ad caregivers and spouses
  3.  
    Make sure it has a poop deck available!
    • CommentAuthorGail*
    • CommentTimeMay 31st 2009
     
    Count me in if you have unlimited food bar 24/7 for DH. Otherwise he will think he is starving to death. :-)
    • CommentAuthordoneit
    • CommentTimeMay 31st 2009
     
    Can I come with TJ as my caregiver?
    • CommentAuthorscs
    • CommentTimeMay 31st 2009
     
    Love to be in charge of infirmary...will supply beautiful nurses...male and female. No norovirus, happy pills for all. Sundowners cocktail specials for LO. Medically supervised wheelchair races..
  4.  
    I'm clueless, doneit, what did you have in mind?? :)
    • CommentAuthordoneit
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    TJ I need someone to fan me with a palm leaf and bring me drinks in tall glasses with tiny umbrellas
  5.  
    I can do that....we can take turns.
    • CommentAuthorcarosi*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    If there are pool attendants for us ladies, surely there must be spa personnel for us all.
  6.  
    I would think so, carosi.

    Doneit, I was thinking maybe you also meant as escort, to include some dancing.

    DW and I were quite the dancers, but since she lost her balance 26 years ago, I haven't danced since. I don't even think I remember how.
  7.  
    But you're a quick study, aren't you, TJ?
    • CommentAuthorcs
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    Ports of call: Land of the Lost , Fantasy Island, Peeto Rico and Cabo Loco. cs
  8.  
    I don't know anymore, Vickie. With the right coach, I guess. It would be fun to try anyway. :)
    • CommentAuthordivvi*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    oh wow! well lets not forget a stop in martinique.. the french side- where are the skinny dipping and nude bathing goes on??? and our own official specialty drink, called the "COCO-LOCO" and everyone will drink them in abundance-. who knows maybe our spouses will find themselves again for a bit with all the fresh ketones! hahaa.
    and plan to attend the midnite buffet which is CHOCOLATE LOVERS DECADENCE! intended to send our spouses sweet tooth into oblivion:) - and i believe we should close off the 'promenade' deck for the 'wanderers and pacers' around 4pm every afternoon while the rest of us booze itup around the pool.:)i hope someone reminded them to stock depends onboard:)
    this cruise certainly sounds devine.... divvi
  9.  
    I am thoroughly enjoying this thread. Have fun...
  10.  
    Don't forget either the British or U.S. Viagra Islands!
  11.  
    Tonight, the ship is docking at Musha Cay, and happy hour will last from 2pm until 2am, and ballroom dancing will be open all night. A seven course meal, Featuring fried chocolate cake, chocolate potatoes, green beans au chocolat, biftek chocolat, creme de chocoat, choco-chicken, Mocha Pork, and chocolate zuppa, and our dining room will be located in the ballroom.
    Tomorrow, the pool will feature 2 attendants for each person, and will include pedicures, massages, fanning, and personal services. Additionally, the pool is scheduled for cleaning, and the pool boy crew will be doubled in order to accomplish this quicker.
    Shopping will be available and excursions to Musha Cay will depart at 9am and noon, and return at 5pm.
    Coconut martinis are the drink of the day, and will feature extra mct extract, with double shots.
    Poop deck will be closed for renovations
    • CommentAuthordivvi*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    phranque. i suggest members meeting prior to dinner in the Memory Lane Lounge lower Baja deck for a quick martini and a handout of free packet of their anti-psychotic drug of choice- for either passengers or patients?? just to mellow out everyone before dining..:) and just for the record-it was not MY DH who caused them to have to clean out the pool on the poop deck! i heard there is going to be dirty dancing contest in the lounge later?? and marsh and joan are going to enter and Doneit and TJ?? and of course Bille and divvi as his/her poop king/queen...:)
    divvi
    • CommentAuthorJean21*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    phranque, you might want to make sure they use lots of air fresheners when they renovate the poop deck. lol
  12.  
    No air fresheners will be needed....we will be heading into a catagory 4 tropical storm on Wed.....
  13.  
    Oh, great, that's all we need - another "storm" to fight!
  14.  
    Everyone is reminded that, as of 1 June, they'll need an up-to-date passport to re-enter the U.S. after visiting various destinations in the Western Hemisphere, per the new Western Hemisphere Travel Initiative announced in today's paper. And considering all the drinking that is evidently planned, equipping the ship with lots of extra pissports would probably also be wise.
    • CommentAuthorShanteuse
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    Why would anyone want to come back? Staying on the cruise indefinitely sounds like a lot more fun.
  15.  
    I want a cabin with a balcony and a butler.
    • CommentAuthordoneit
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    Will GC be making those cute aminals out of towels for our turn down service?
    •  
      CommentAuthorSusan L*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    Oh dear, I had my heart set on stopping at Looney Landing to do some shopping. I'll need to get a grass skirt, a lei, haven't had one of those in a while, lol! and a floppy straw hat. I would love a chair on the lower deck so that DH can do some real deep sea fishing. The Memory Lane Lounge sound like just the place for a Pina Coconuter. We'll need some dance instructors for those of us who haven't boogied for a while too.
    • CommentAuthordoneit
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    Susan-did you spell lei right? :-}
    • CommentAuthorJean21*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    Okay phranque, if we are heading into a cat 4 storm count me out. Today was the first day of the hurrican season here in SC and I am hoping and praying anything we get will not be major. I'l stay home with my Bacardi and coke and think about you all getting seasick from the storm or just getting sick from all the booze and food. Enjoy.
  16.  
    I hope you put some bales of hay on board and lots of dinner rolls in case any of us wants a good old roll in the hay. Been a long time.
    • CommentAuthordanielp*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009 edited
     
    I'd love to join the cruise
    • CommentAuthordivvi*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    doneit i think she needs that spelling too... :) haha..

    i'd like to win some in the casino at my favorite game now...CRAPS!
    hahaha!!~~~~~~

    divvi
    • CommentAuthorMawzy*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    I'm not sure how much fun I'd be but I used to be a pretty good dancer. DH and I did dance at oldest grandson's wedding 2 years ago. That was pretty fun.

    I like to go on those port of call tours and I really enjoy the shows the staff puts on in the theater. Is anyone else up for that.

    How long is this cruise going to be? I'm not trying to rush anyone. I just want to know how much $$ I need to take with me. :) (grin). I don't gamble at all but I've heard it said that I can be a big spender if in the mood. (another grin).

    Do I need to go someplace to pick up the ship or is it going to dock in Seattle? I can pick it up then if you let me know the date(s).

    This is going to be a good time.
    • CommentAuthordoneit
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    Mawzy I do believe the ship starts in the Port of Miami sails through the Panama Canal then heads your way. Not sure how the Mainiacs will embark.
  17.  
    The ship can go anywhere...it has wheels also......no problem getting to maine via alaska
  18.  
    I'm confused--which direction is this ship going? North or south, doesn't matter, you'll have to pass Los Angeles sooner or later. Can we stop in Hawaii?
    •  
      CommentAuthorSusan L*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    Lay, lei, roll in the hey, yes we might, yes we may, oh my, what a great day!
    •  
      CommentAuthorSusan L*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    Betty, we HAVE to stop in Hawaii, I need my LEI!
  19.  
    Well, Susan, don't we all!
    •  
      CommentAuthorol don*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    if anyone is thinking of trolling off the stern be forwarned, use very short lines!
  20.  
    This is all hitting to close to home. I'm going to sign-off now and start getting DW (and me) ready for bed. Y'all have a good night. (sigh..)
    • CommentAuthorGail*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    Just be sure to stop in Arkansas.
    • CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    Pick me up as you head to Seattle. And I don't want to come back!!
    • CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    I want to learn line dancing, folk dancing and ballroom dancing on the cruise. I always wanted to but hb would not. I saw in the senior 'The message' newspaper they are offering line dancing for beginners and intermediate. Would love to do it but will have to wait until later.
    • CommentAuthorMawzy*
    • CommentTimeJun 1st 2009
     
    Line dancing. That sounds like a whole lot of fun to me. Can I bring my portable oxygen with me? I'd get too winded if I didn't.

    Gee, ain't getting old fun? :)
    • CommentAuthorcs
    • CommentTimeJun 2nd 2009
     
    Mawzy...Monopoly money only. Oh and schedule a passanger pick up on Lake Erie. cs
    •  
      CommentAuthorSusan L*
    • CommentTimeJun 2nd 2009
     
    My Goodness Frank Look at What You Have Started, it had better be an annual trip!
  21.  
    It's an ongoing trip......and so much better than the old leaky boat we used to be in......gotta love it