As we are all aware, we only suspect something is wrong with our spouses in the beginning. We wonder about the personality changes and wonder if it is the beginning of the end of our marriages, before we realize that when we add that to the forgetfulness that we have attributed to getting older (of which we all have a little - such as misplaced keys), the lack of eye perception or the compulsive orderliness signs manifest themselves enough to where we can't "write it off with excuses." Something is wrong. We take them to the doctor, and some get diagnosis right away, and some (like me) have to prove to the doctor that there is something wrong and it takes a year for diagnosis. By this time, our spouse is in Stage 3.
We have written extensively about what we wish we had known when going through those stages to help others. During Stages 4 and 5, which most of those here are in right now, we have hundreds of discussions to look at for things to do to solve the issues of the day (which are too numerous to mention).
Stage 6, which has it's own set of more dirty issues, requiring extra housecleaning duties, also offers a little more fun, in that they can feed themselves for the most part, dress themselves for the most part, and can walk and look normal, but do some of the wackiest things that you have to grin over! The arguing is gone (for the most part) and the caregivers have put on key-locked deadbolts for those insisting on leaving the house and/or the bedroom if they get up during the night (some even use child gates to make a maze through the house rather than lock the door). The locked bedroom door only works if you are sharing the bedroom! <grin>
Having read Frank Broyles' book concerning the "Last Stage," I'm hoping that those who have been through it will share with us the things to look for and what they did to help their spouses through this. I am aware that a lot of you have had to place your spouses when they have reached this stage, and I know that at some point, I'll probably have to as well. But my spouse is not violent or abusive. He's as docile as a kitten, and cuddly, and we can still take care of him at this point.
Those who are widows and widowers, as well as those whose spouses (spice) are in the last stage, please share your experiences with us.
Thank you Mary for your post . Like you I need this . We I guess ??? are maybe in stage 3 or 4 . No big problems other than my DW just can not remember where we are ,Dr. Names and appointment , Days of the week . Just a lot of things like that . We hanging in there and enjoying each day we are together .
I would also appreciate information here. My DH is in stage 5. I am now starting to have to clean his teeth (permanent bridge) and he doesn't remember to take pills or eat anymore.
There is no joy at this stage. All you can hope for is no skin breakdown or falls. Safety and comfort (if that is possible) is all there is. You start to let go and then panic when they have a bad day. Your heart stops when the phone rings at an odd hour. Sometimes you even carry your cell phone in your hand lest you miss a crucial call. Sorry-nothing sunny at this stage-just waiting.....
Well, the last stage for us started in October of 2003...my husband started with the incontinence and was falling on a regular basis because he refused to sit down or sleep in bed...he would walk until he fell over or if anyone could get him to sit someone would sit next to him and throw their legs over his lap....he also could no longer feed himself and could no longer verbalize any understandable words or phrases. By the next month he was bedridden and hospice took over his care in his AD facility. He remained bedridden and under hospice until February of 2005 when I decided to bring him home. Hospice had discharged him because he was "stable".....he lived at home with me as his caregiver until March of 2008 when he died of pneumonia.
It is a strange disease...some people I know have LOs who die soon after becoming "end stage"....others like my husband last for years in that stage.....I think the fact that my husband was only 50 at diagnosis in 1997 and in excellent health otherwise, was the reason he lasted as long as he did.
Thank you, Bluedaze and Sandi, for sharing your comments. I have been thinking more and more about the "end stage". My husband is totally incontinent, paces all the time (thankfully, hasn't fallen), harder and harder to get him into the shower, needs help with eating, dressing, everything. I sometimes panic when I realize he depends on me for everything, even water and food. I'm hoping I have the strength to keep him home. What a horrible club we all belong to. Thank you to everyone who posts here to help us deal with this horrible disease.
Claude is nearing the end. He has declined dramatically over the last six weeks or so. He also has congestive heart failure and his heart is wearing out. Hospice has ordered a hospital bed. He has reached the point that the CNA is having difficulty getting him in and out of our stall shower so she will be doing "helmet baths" from now on.
He is totally incontinent at night. He soaks thru chux, a cotton waterproof pad and two extra heavy duty depends type briefs nearly every night so I have to strip our king size bed every morning. During the day, he will use the toliet some of the time.
He is totally dependent on me. He can't dress himself and gets lost in the house. He can still feed himself most things but things that require hand coordination such as a spoon, he can't do.
I want to keep him home until the end. I only hope I am strong enough both physically and emotionally to do it.
((HUGS ))) to you all. reading these posts brings it all too close and back to reality. those of us on the same path will eventually be there as well. sigh.Divvi
I want to thank those of you who have responded. I know it is difficult to relive, but it will be of help to those of us yet facing it. I hope more will respond.....bettyhere, Trisinger, Patricia, and others....please let us hear from you as well.
I want to add my thanks to you that have kindly responded to this. Surely it is painful. I for one am glad this subject has come up as my DH is early stage 6. I have been thinking, sadly, about what is to come. What I will have to face and get mentally prepared for it. I am trying to cope like everyone else. DH now needs help with his shower and is lax in his toilet habits, but as yet not incontinent, also needs help with dressing, is up and down all night being restless. I want you all to know how much I appreciate your help.
Thanks to all of you for the info. I've wondered what stage DH is in now. I think it's 6. He is totally dependant on me for almost everything except feeding himself. He has Lewy Body Dementia. He can hardly walk, sometimes uses walker, cane or I may have to use the wheelchair. He's incontinent of urine but still used the toilet at times. My biggest problem is his sleeping 16 to 18 hrs a day. He just is so tired. When he's up he is agreeable and easy to care for. But I get so frustrating waiting and waiting for him to get up. He can't remember much. I get so angry at this disease. He just wants to die and I can't blame him. Sometimes I blame him for not trying but then feel so bad because I know it's the disease. He's been diagnosed about a year, but has had trouble for a while. Thanks for hearing me out. I need all the help and support I can. Thank you for this site! Nancy
nancy, I can see myself following along behind you in this journey. I wouldn't want to live if I were in the stage 6 and no quality of life left. I realize it is hard for us to let them go but we need to remember the quality of life they have to look forward to, especially after they don't recognize us any more. Thinking of you Nancy.
My DH is in the last stage of Alzheimers....two weeks ago we noticed he had difficulty swallowing his food and liquids. A blood workup was done, finding very high sodium levels, he also had lost a great deal of weight since Sept. 141 to 131. We decided with staff to give him an intravenous water drip for 36 hrs. to see if his body could recover. He was put on pureed food. I must mentiion that he has been incontinent for years, not able to talk with verbal aphasia, in past year in a wheelchair only able to walk with assistance, did not recognize his family often. After the driip, he rallyed for a day but quickly became lethargic again sleeping often. We are not putting in a feeding tube if he can no longer eat. He still does eat but his body is not getting nutrition from the food. he must be fed by others and this has been for a long time (years) He has lost four pounds in a week and probably will continue to lose. He has been on hospice for a week. I have read t hat with these signs he is likely to pass soon. He has always been very healthy before Alzheimers so he has battled fiercely but the disease is winning now. I don't know how long he has.....his diagnosis was in 2000 but I knew he had great difficulties with memory as long ago as 1996. difficulty swallowing, lethargic and sleeping often, bluish skin, weight loss appear to be significant signs.
We are living day to day sitting with him, and any interaction is viewed as a gift from God...I h ope this helps to give some pertinent information to my friends. he now weighs 124 lbs.
Dear Friends--these stories are just heartbreaking. Thank you so much for your gifts of sharing with us. My DH is declining--quite a bit in the last 6-8 weeks. Today he didn't remember he had a brother. He can't remember the names of things i.e., placemats, pillows, forks and spoons. He does not prepare his own meals at all and if I don't fix his meals, he will forget. Last night I made him a pizza. An hour later he asked if we'd had supper. That kind of thing. No in continence or wandering. Mostly he just sits for hours looking ag Nat'l Georgraphic pictures. I don't think he reads the material.
Very sad. I really do want to keep him at home as long as possible. I just can't see myself placing him. If I ever have to do that, it's going to be a very bad day.
As you can all read the stage 7 can go very slow (and I don't know how you do this for years) or very fast. I know Frand and I think trisinger and myself all went thru stage 7 at lightening speed. In a matter of 6weeks we went from where I had him out on a family dinner to a very fancy restaurant, I had to assist him witk h meal ordering, meat cutting and had one of the men take him to the bathroom but these were minor and normal details. That was Nov 9. By Dec 15 he had deteriorated dramatically. Could not eat except for a little pureed food which we fed, could not even suck liquid thru a straw, everytime he tried to get up he fell unless assisted. Up all nite pulling ateverything within reach. Nights were a series of crashes and all bedding would wind up on floor. One nite he fell 4 times and I had to get son up to try to get him back in bed. Hospice nurse talked me into 5 very badly needed days of respite care. He went on Dec 15. By evening they had called and said he was having some heart event going on (hands and feet blue). This went on all week, and we extended stay for 3 extra days. We were going to get hospital bed on Monday and bring him home Tuesday the 23. Saturday morning nursing home called and said he died quietly while they were doing mornihng vital signs. Instead of bringing him home on the 23, we buried him. But maybe that was the ultimate "going home". As I recall Frand also had a very fast very sudden downhill run.
Some Joy to report tho - the onocologist and breast surgeon both think what they are seeing in my breast is change due to all the radiation I had. Biopsy report which I just got was "benign" They are doing an MRI next week, more thru an abundance of caution than more serious concerns. My pg daughter developed preeclampsia last week and on TuesdAY they took the baby by c-section. Mother and baby both doing just great. I will go down Sunday to help for a few days (other new grandmother is with her right now). Big stress reliever for me to have these two issues resolved so now I am going to treat myself. Son and I are going to Ireland for 6 days the end of March. I am so excited as I have wanted to make this trip for almost 50 years and now I am actually going. Love and hugs to all of you how are still struggling. Patricia
joyful, we are here with you. Waiting is long and tiring. It does sound like your wait is going to be over soon, as will his suffering. He will be in a better place and know what is going on.
My dh feet are dark mornings when he gets up. I need to check if they are the same afternoons when he has been on them a while. Must be circulation.
Mawzy, we are very lucky to not have the incontinence or wandering. Good luck at your meeting. Is this the one you are teaching? What is your topic?
Joyful, you and your family are in my prayers. You and your DH have fought the good fight, and soon the battle will be over, with both of you moving on to better places. I wish you peace at the end of the journey.
Good morning everyone, I haven't posted in a while but felt this topic was very close to home..The last stage is different for every one from what i read.. my husband went from laughing and and dancingand giving any one who came to see us flowers ,to not being able to talk ,walk or eat in a matter of days . He started having seizures and passing out. He wasn't able to eat ,then he lost weight .from Aug.-Nov. just a few short weeks. It surprises me to this day that it was that short. I pray everyday a cure will help all of you especially the young one and recently diagnosed .All you can do is take one day at a time and love your loved one as if it is the last time . I miss my husband so much ......
The last stage is different for everyone. My dh has been in a steady decline for the last year. He no longer walks or talks. The last few weeks he has lost the ability to feed himself. He tries, but needs help and does not eat much now. The Hospice nurse told me it is the loss of another motor skill. It is heartbreaking and I was so upset about the lastest loss. He has lost some weight, has adema and possible heart failure. Our aim now is to make him as comfortable as possible. It is hard to say how I feel. I hate to see him as he is, but the thought of losing him is terrifying to me even if the person I married is not longer there. It is a heartbreaking time and my thoughts and prayers are with all of us that are going through yet another part of this horrible disease.
I never in a million years thought that I would wish for the good Lord to take him in any of the stages, but now in stage 7 I know I have to face reality. After all these years of knowing that this horrible stage 7 was coming, I still hung onto the hope that somehow, somewhere, things would still be manageable. But this past year, things are happening much faster. Dh can do absolutely nothing for himself. He can still walk short distances but beyond that, he simple falls straight to the floor. I got a wheelchair a few weeks ago so that when the weather gets warmer, I can take him for walks. His legs are so skinny and the bones and veins are so visable that if his skin were peeled back that's you would see. It also seems as though one of his eyes is not centered. I know he can't see things such as pictures and such. He hasn't been able to read anything for years and he walks into walls, chairs, couches.........he doesn't see anything in his path. It's like a wind-up toy still moving but stopped by a wall. He will only pee once a day no matter how many times I sit him on the pot. During his adult life he weighed around 175 and he now is down to 138. He usually eats very little but once in a while he will eat a little more. For the past couple of years he called me by my mother's name but he doesn't even do that anymore. He can't communicate hardly at all. He knows I am there with him but he does not know my relationship to him nor does he know anyone else except that they are paying some sort of attention to him.
Many of you talk about the incontinence. Does this always happen in stage 7? Dh has had a few mishaps but since he only goes once a day (and that is at night before bed when I sit him on the pot until he goes), I don't know if that is always what happens at this stage. I have talked to his doctor about this and he says to give him more fluids which I do but it makes no difference.
I wish there was some way to know how long this will last but I know it's different in every case. It's just so hard.....so so so so so hard to watch this happening to a man so young and who once was more full of life than anyone I know.
I find it so difficult to read about the last stages and what each of you are going through - and probably what I will have to go through when the time comes. My DH is functioning so very well and my heart just aches for all of you. Thank you for sharing this unbearably difficult time with the rest of us. I hope you realize what a terrific unselfish act you have done. Thank you.
Thanks Vickie, but I really can't think of a time that it has not been difficult (at least for me). Each stage has it's own problems. There was a time my DH was mad or angry at me most of the time(before diagnosis). Then there was the agitation and depression. It is all hard and taking it a day at a time will help. It is the "long goodbye".
I can't read this thread without tears. Thank you so much for sharing. As sad as it is, we need to know what's coming so we can prepare mentally, emotionally, physically and financially. Like Vickie, my DH functions pretty well right now. Our biggest problem is just forgetting things and some confusion. Joan mentioned in one of her blogs the heartbreak of mentioning something that we've done in the past that was so much fun or so important and he just doesn't remember. He will tell me he's sorry he doesn't remember. Like Darlene said, it's all hard no matter what stage they're in. Right now, I'm hoping this will go really slow but toward the end stage, oh I pray it will go fast.
Went to visit my sweetheart today with my son, his wife, and children. Earnnie is still eating about 70 percent of his pureed food, and drinking water and other liquids however he continues to lose weight. He is now weighed at least every two to three days. In three days he has lost another two pds. and now weighs 122 lbs. He was alert today and his eyes followed our grandson tossing a basketball into a basketball net in his room. His eyes are sunken into his head more and his legs are mottled with reddish purple (look like bruises) He is not in pain and appears comfortable. We know he cannot continue to lose weight at the rate he is doing and continue living. Parcadoxially his eyes have regained their beautiful clear blue shade. THey have not been this color for a long time and had been very dull in color. I feel helpless to stop the decline of his vital signs and must watch helplessly as he slips away.
Joyful.......Just want you to know that my heart is with you and your family. This horrible AD is a nightmare from beginning to end but this end part is the hardest, I think. We know it's coming but when it's finally here, it's heartbreaking, heartbreaking, heartbreaking. God bless you all.
I have never been sure of my husband's stage at any given time and don't know. Since he can't speak, it is hard to judge his memory. I think he knows people but maybe not, he treats everyone the same. Just kind of looks through us. Has just started to have trouble getting his food down. And even though he drinks very little, he pees constantly. Many of you have mentioned blue hands and face. His nose gets blue and his hands get white as paper off and on through the day.
I can't read this thread without feeling very sad & with tears not far away. I have not been told what stage my DH is at but after reading what you wonderful people have shared with us he is nowhere near the end stage at the moment but my Dad is sure at the last stage he is so much like some of you have told us. We thought we were going to lose him just before Christmas but he has rallied around again & back on his feet using a walker or wheelchair, we are at the moment getting afew words & some cheek from him which is neat as my sister is visiting him from out of town.
well this is my first post and wish I had found this site years ago. I hope this is the right place to post and hope I'm not to wordy. my introduction in brief is I am 45 and my wife of 24yrs is 61. I have been the only caregiver since day one until recent. We are now being told that we are entering stage 7. she has been totaly incontinant for quite sometime. is unable to talk other than what I have been told is "rapid chantting" only a few words come in between the chanting. she is still semi moble. she will walk with assistance or often falls without. just reciently sleeping through the night in hospital bed. (me sleeping in a recliner at her side for over 8 months now). she is unable to do anything for her self anymore and spends her day chanting to her reflection in the mirror if I let her. She knows of me, but has no clue I am her husband. I have finally got some in-home care for her (3 hours 4 days per week for batheing & breakfast). I just made the hard desision that it might be best for both of us to have her placed in a local NH, as I am a burnt out caregiver and felt I would be of more help to her if I was a rested one that came daily to assist her there. I was shocked when I took the dreaded drive with her to the NH, only to be turne away, o to them feeling that her "rapid chanting" would upset the other residenants and their staff. Is the only NH within an hour of the rural area we live. they sugested I find a ALz locked unit. I have had nothing but trouble with Senior Services granting services due to her age. Been told she is maxed out on services, NO Respite or companion services for us until she is 65. Anyone else run into this with Senior services for their loved ones? I need Ideas of what to do now that she needs more services but Senior services will not help due to her age and me still being at home caring for her. We live in a no-cap state for medicaid, which means that when or if I work the majority of my income will be used against her and would have to go towards her medicaid spend down that has to be met each month for what services we get now from Senior services.
Paul B I am so sorry for your situation. Sounds like you are another one of those fantastic husbands who post on this site. We are so glad you have decided to come here and I know you will receive lots of good advice from posters here. I cannot help you other than extend a hand of friendship and caring. My dh is still in earlier stage and I have had no contact with senior services. My husband is 74 with Parkenism with VD and AD. He is still mobile and able to do most of his personal hygene but not much else. Take care and others will be around in the later morning.
Hi Paul B, and a very reluctant welcome from one of the "fantastic husbands" on this site. You're SO YOUNG to be going through all this -- most of us are thirty or so years older than you. My 82 year old wife is in about the same shape as your wife except she's not yet incontinent and is still able to talk -- but sleeps most of the time. I'm fortunate in that our 52 year old bachelor son moved back in with us about five months ago to help me care for her -- allowing me to get out of the house to do needed errands or chores when he's home from work -- and even do a little socializing with friends sometimes. It sounds like you're in a real pickle there with your wife too young to qualify for services available for seniors, but it could be that Hospice might be an answer for you. I don't have any experience with Hospice myself, but others on this forum should be able to give you better advice about that. But the gist of it is that Hospice can evidently come in for an AD patient whose doctor has said that they are "failing to thrive", since AD is, by definition, a terminal condition. I hope you'll stick with this forum, because I know you'll find some answers to your questions and plenty of moral support here. I wish you all the best of a very bad situation!
Dear Paul B. I'm so sorry that you are going through all of this but very happy that you've found this site. I've been using this site for 6 months and have learned more than I thought was possible.
We have not used senior services at all so am unable to be of help to you. But like Ihmor, I'm giving you my hand of friendship. Someone will be along soon to give you tips and clues on how to work through the maze of senior services. I'm just glad I don't have to do that yet.
Paul B-I'm in a similar situation. My wife is 51 and I am 60. I don't know what AD stage she is in because she also has small cell lung cancer that has caused some brain atrophy on its own. Everybody tells you, "get some help" and "you can't do it alone". When you make the difficult decision to actually get some help, there is none to be had. You made too much money last year, but ignores the fact that you are going broke this year. You have to fill out forms for the various 'help' agencies, disclosing more than you have told anybody, ever; only to be told that you don't qualify because of age. You're told to check back in 6 months or 6 weeks, when you are worried about everybody surviving the next 6 hours. Respite for me is when DW is chatting with the 'lady in the mirror'. I know that this isn't particulary helpful, but Welcome and hang in there the best that you can.
Welcome to my website. I usually explain all of the resources and support that are available here to newcomers, but you need some critical help immediately, so here is what I recommend. Your wife is in a situation that all "under 65" AD patients get caught in - falling through the cracks. Since she is in the last stage, I would suggest you call Hospice ASAP. They can get things done that no one else can. Talk to them first, ask them for advice, and they will get you the services you need.
When you get a chance, please log onto the home page - www.thealzheimerspouse.com- and scroll through all of the resources on the left side. Especially the EOAD (Early Onset Alzheimer's Disease). In the "previous blog" section, you will find many topics to which you can relate.
We are all spouses here - I started this site because there were no resources that spoke directly to spousal issues - we all understand and support one another. (And by the way, you could not have found this site years ago - I started it 18 months ago - July -07.)
Paul B, Welcome to this family of caring people who understand what you're going through. Gourdchipper and Joang gave you very good advice about contacting Hospice. Let us know how it goes after talking to them. We're here for you.
Paul B, I'm sorry to hear of the difficult situation you find yourself in. Welcome to the forum, we will do our best to help and support you. My wife is in early Stage 5, so I can't identify with some of the issues that you are facing.
Please contact your local Alzheimer's Association they may be able give you some guidance and assistance with your situation.
Paul, as everyone else has said, Welcome! I have faced many of the same issues as you with Senior Services. My Dh is only 54 so, they really look at me like I am off my rocker. I don't have an answer for you with them. But wanted to say, Joan/Admin suggestion of Hospice will be a wonderful asset to you, They are wonderful people who will guide both of you thru the process of the journey. They will care for your wife in a very loving gentle way while giving you the knowledge, strength and support you will need. Here in Colorado you have to be referred to them thru a Doctor, not sure what process is needed in your state. But checking with her DR may help guide you to getting them out there to help you. I know you said, your late in finding this site, but your here now. I am sure you will find some wonderful answers, suggestions, ideas, to help you along this journey. Best wishes! Rk
PaulB, we are not exactly in your situation. My wife is 78 (I am 77) so we don't have to worry about being "too young". I agree with the above suggestions: Contact hospice, contact Alzheimer association. Between the 2 you should be able to get some help. Glad you found this site, but sorry for the reason you need it.
PaulB you have found a good place for info and support. you are doing a wonderful job and your wife will get good care and you help thru hospice if you are able to get it. check with the dr and alz assoc closest to you. glad to see you here, Divvi
Thoughts ... Paul, what about contacting your state senators? Tell them your sorry saga, explain that you've looked for ideas here and so far, have been told that others who have been in your shoes haven't found any signs of equal support for early-onset dementia patients, either. Sometimes your elected representatives can work miracles -- they typically have a large staff who will dig into things like this for their constituents.
Even if they can't help you right away, the Obama administration is looking for ideas on what needs to be done to fix healthcare ... your senators may become interested in championing your cause with them. (You might mention the idea to them.)
Re hospice: First, find as many hospice organizations in your area as you can. Call the social worker and/or the discharge planners at the hospitals in your vicinity, and ask them the name(s) and phone number(s) of the hospice(s) they refer to. Also, look in the yellow pages and see if you can find any others. Then call each hospice yourself. Do NOT speak to the intake coordinator (bluedaze, no offense intended ... ); instead, ask to speak to the RN supervisor. Ask him/her whether you have to have a doctor's referral, what assistance they can offer you, and whether or not they can accept your wife as a patient.
While you're chatting about hospice, ask the RN supervisor if s/he can offer you any ideas about other sources of help for your wife.
I wonder ... maybe the social worker or discharge planner at the hospital might also have ideas for other sources of help, in addition to hospice. Wouldn't hurt to ask.
And when you contact your local Alzheimer's Association, ask if they have a social worker. Also ask if there's an AD research center or memory disorder clinic in your area -- they often have social workers, too.
I don't suppose you're a veteran? People who have served in the armed forces for at least one day during "war time" may be eligible for a benefit that's called "Aid and Attendance." It provides money for Veterans and surviving spouses who require the regular assistance of another person in the activities of daily living. The dates for the Persian Gulf War are from Aug 2, 1990 through a future date which hasn't been established yet. Note: you don't have to have actually fought, and you don't have to have a service-related injury.
Also, Joan (I think it was) found a booklet that's got a lot of ideas, which can be downloaded at:
What a thread this is ... from so much sorrow and struggle, to TheQueen's joyous news. Patricia, I am so very, very, VERY happy to hear about your biopsy report!!! It is so rare we hear good news like that. Wonderful... Enjoy your trip!
joyful ... what more is there to be said? It is so very, very hard to helplessly watch your husband dying, I know. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs...
It snowed last night and the weather is so cold and difficult to drive in I am staying home today . my dh is in a VA home 45 miles from here and I have Parkinsons so I have someone else drive me on the freeway. The hospice nurse called and told me my sweetheart had a fever this morning but after medication and a shower his temp was now normal. He is weak but alert, eating approx 50% of his breakfast. They are putting him on honey thickened liquids to better help him swallow. She said he might live weeks unless he quits eating then he would fade away morr quickly as he weighs so little now (122).
All people are so individual so their death process es are all individual also....I do wish I could be with him more but we are doing the best we can. This watching and having such uncertainy is so sad and heartewrenching.
Dear Joyful--I love your screen name. You must be a lovely person to choose such a descriptive name.
My heart is breaking for you. To be separated at this time and have the health problems that you have has to be so frustrating. You and your family are in my prayers.
joyful, thank you for sharing. Mawzy said it beautifully. I feel the same way...
Thank all of you who have been kind enough to share/relive this part of your life with those of us who will be going down this path. You have made our journey easier to bear.
My thoughts and prayers are with each and every one of you. You are very special!
Andrea entered the NH exactly one year ago last week. She had become incontinent. We stopped her AD medications in February, just the ones for stopping the decline, not the personality ones. We were advised to go on Hospice in March. We were surprised, but had noticed she had lost a lot of weight, which is why they recommended it. She was eating fine...we saw her. But she lost and lost and lost weight, and then she just died. It took 6 months.