Hi, Shannon, and a big welcome to our family. How very young you both are ... so sad. Won't you tell us more about you? Start a new thread, or add to "Where are you from?" and "Before dementia what did your spouse do for a living?" And please let us know if there's anything we can do for you.
I'm 70 and my spouse is 82. I'm worried about the few caregivers that lived to be in their 80's. That's not a good thing! C'mon all you Octogenarians...give us seventy-somethings some encouragement!!!! I'm so sorry to see so many fifty-somethings in this interesting survey.
<<I'm worried about the few caregivers that lived to be in their 80's. That's not a good thing! C'mon all you Octogenarians...give us seventy-somethings some encouragement!!!! >>
Hi Nancy B, one octogenarian (81) checking in. I expect that one reason you see so many more younger caregivers on this forum is that older folks are just less likely to be computer literate enough, or inclined, to participate in an online support group like this.
My caregiving role has evolved over a period of seven or so years, but didn't really become intensive 24/7 caregiving until about a year ago when my wife moved, rather quickly, into Stage 6. With heart bypass surgery and new teeth behind me a couple of years ago, and new hearing aids just last week, I figure I'm set to go for another ten years or more -- some of which I expect to be GOOD years after this caregiving chapter is closed. One thing that's really helping me to maintain a positive outlook is that our unmarried 52-yeqr-old mental health counselor son took pity on me and moved back in with us about six months ago to help out "for the duration" -- allowing me to run errands and even have something of a social life when he's not working.
I will preach forever that the strongest thing a caregiver should possess is a sense of humor. Amidst the tears and screams and woes, I read a little quip or something that lightens the mood. Or is just me? I know that I try to get him to laugh at something everyday. If all I get is a little sideways smile, I score a point!
Thanks everyone for your warm welcome. This message board is the best thing I have found in a while. Haven't had much luck finding a good therapist, etc. I just need to know that other spouses are feeling what I am feeling and that I am not going crazy!!! I do not have a cat unless you count the 2 from next door who peer in our back door. I live in Denver and own a gift basket company which I run from home. My husband was a banker before he was diagnosed 2 years ago. I would say he is probably in stage 4...
OK Shannon-you can stay as long as you talk to the next door kitties. Isn't it a pitty that our successful spouses have to endure this hateful disease. My only hope is that they will not realize how awful it is. Again-welcome
Hi, 2x around, and welcome. Won't you start a new thread, and tell us a little more about yourself and your husband? And whether there's anything we can do for you?
I believe I was the first one listed in the 80's. Welcome to the other three. Gourdchipper, don't worry about us old ones. We are tough "ole birds" We will survive. Spring has arrived in The Heart of Dixie. The trees are waking up and putting on thier summer dresses and and I am encouraged that I can find a new attitude.
Hi Bama -- yes this "ole bird" actually feels GOOD nearly all the time, with almost no minor aches and pains. I'm still able to keep up, physically, with mowing our five acres and other such manly tasks, just have to coordinate things like that to be done while our son is home to keep an eye on my DW. I'm so fortunate having him here! As for spring, yes, our oaks are covered with those little green pollen things, but happily it's been too dry down here for the grass to realize it's spring and start growing yet! Throwing some fertilizer under our starfruit and citrus trees is on my list of things to do today.
bluedaze - must be 'global warming'. ?? Here in Vanc.WA it is cool, windy with a forecast of snow. 50 years ago it was normal for snow to show (not stick around in the valley) but not the last 20 years. So far there has been brief flurry and just a brief hail. So much for global warming!
I planted 25 flats of petunias a week or so ago, my caladiums are coming up and my snapdragons are blooming. I cannot wait for it to be full fledged spring!!! We've had strange weather in Houston this year...including a horrible hurricane and a snowfall (only in the air) followed by the next day when temps were back in the 70's. I don't know what to expect of the weather. I love digging in dirt. - Makes me feel happy...at the time. Then the backache kicks in. It's worth the pain.
Nancy-if I planted 25 flats of anything I wouldn't be able to straighten up. My amaryllis are in full bloom-flowers almost 12" across. Spring is coming.
I cannot believe how beautiful your amaryllis must be. How elegant those flowers are. No, I couldn't straighten up..and slept on a heating pad for two nights.. I had my handyman helping, he calls himself Sugarfoot!.. but I was down on my knees pointing and reaching back and forth to the flats.. They are so pretty, deep purples, pale pinks,deep rose, whites, yellows... and I Imixed up the colors. Are your amaryllis red or white?
They are pink and white striped. The woman who owned the house before me was NOT a gardner. She must have gotten the first plant as a Christmas gift and just stuck the bulb outside in the bushes. I found it by accident and since divided it into many plants. Growing free of a pot the bulbs are huge and divide easily.
I am 58, as is my DH. He was diagnosed officially in April 2008, probably started Oct 2006 or so. Loss in last 6 mo has been appalling. Gone from working full time and doing OK spring 2007, to on medical leave Jan 2008 to full disability July 2009. Driving OK Aug 2008 and now can no longer drive. Did our 2008 taxes with just a couple math errors and now can't do any finances, even data entry. Basically Stage 5. Guess the rapidity isn't all a problem. He's self-aware enough to hope he doesn't linger too long...but not depressed.