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    My husband is pre-alzheimic (my word). My memory is not the best either. But, his is becoming more and more noticeable. When he tells his "stories", there is a slightly different element to them (which is not important, really) but it's part of an increasing trend.

    Today, we went through another incident with medical appts on the calendar. He is "THE PERSON" who marks the calendar. I caught something not right, verified it with the doc's office, made correction on calendar. And dreaded showing him this change, and then he insists the original notations are correct.

    I have the proof, and my patience is wearing thin. He is a guy who thinks he is always right, and I'm the dumb one.

    I bite through so many blasted nails I could build a house. It's been 35 yrs of marriage, and It will get worse.
    I've been tested for memory loss, which has been attributed to depression. Yet, I feel this is a "copout" dx. These local docs are something else here. I know people who have had to go out of town, to the bigger university settings, and got the correct dx and thereby assisting them with momentous decisions.

    But, my spouse! He often remarks how his memory is worth nothing.....but dealing with this on a continuing daily basis has me so ANGRY. It's his attitude.....
    • CommentTimeMay 1st 2019
    Sorry you are going through this. Stress and depression can affect memory, so don't discount it as a contributing factor.

    I was fortunate my husband never fought the diagnosis, but many others here sadly have.
    • CommentAuthorpaulc
    • CommentTimeMay 1st 2019
    I am sorry about your husband not recognizing the problems. The part of his brain that would allow him to see his deficiencies is probably damaged.

    When it comes to dementia it isn't unusual to need to see a neurologist who is a dementia expert at a university based hospital.
    • CommentAuthoroakridge
    • CommentTimeMay 5th 2019
    Hi Paul, and Aprilfool48, I often wonder what the value of the neurologist is in dementia? To determine the type? or maybe if there is another source? I guess there are some that need an official medical diagnosis to qualify for some type of benefits, maybe veterans? DH joined the Marines at 17, but because of a broken nose he had to have it repaired before he could qualify for active duty. Then when he was drafted the draft board deemed him essential personnel on the PD so was deferred. Still irritates him today, LOL.

    My husband met with a Neuropsychologist about 18 months ago, took the initial testing and met with the Dr. He said highly intelligent people scored high on the first set and low on the other and vice versa. As expected DR said dh scored high on the first. He said there was obviously dementia,..of the AZ type. Dh was scheduled to go in the next week for an all day testing session. He refused to go and I had to cancel the appt - the minute he heard the word Alzheimers, he was through. It did result in a prescription for Aricept - and later Namenda (which he had to stop). I honestly can't see any difference with or without medication.

    Now he is scheduled to see a Neuropsychiatrist next month. This Dr is highly qualified in every form of Neuro (fill in the blank :) I assume anything to do with the brain. He really doesn't want to go - and I too wonder if it's worth it. You know nothing can be done in a 15 min visit, so it would mean going back & more testing. At 82, he may be right. What is the use of continuing to see specialists? Short of brain scans etc - what more can they do - or why? Psychically, he's very healthy and at this point I don't see the value of trying to qualify it - or explain to me what the problem is - or how far advanced he is. One day he's ranting and raving but an hour later he's forgotten it.

    Yes he drives me crazy and the stress is awful -- but is it anymore than the stress and worry Charlotte has dealing with proper care for Art? I'm not sure there are any real answers to this AZ question/problem, it's just getting through every day. All the studies show caregivers are more at risk than the person they're caring for -- is that news to anyone?

    Our middle son and wife will be here Father's Day, from Oregon. But this is the son who wouldn't go to the hospital when they thought he might not make it because he didn't want to remember him that way. So I don't really expect any words of wisdom nor offers of help from him.

    I think there is a line in the Bible about enduring to the end. Oh, there is some good news. He has completely forgotten the tractor incident and I'm scheduling to have the floors put in about the 18th of May - if they can get it in in time and if the final cost doesn't exceed my budget. the sun is shining, it's a beautiful spring day, and -----as soon as this program is over----LOL, he going to go outside and weed the flowers. At least he's happy and in a good mood this morning.
    • CommentTimeMay 5th 2019 edited
    Are these the lines ?

    2 Timothy 4:7-8 King James Version (KJV)

    7 I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith:

    8 Henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, shall give me at that day: and not to me only, but unto all them also that love his appearing.

    King James Version (KJV)
    Public Domain
    • CommentTimeMay 5th 2019
    You are right about a neurologist. You live with him 24/7 so know more than a short visit would tell you. If the anger is different than his before then maybe there is some FTD. But the outcome is still the same. I remember how Sid, Joan's husband scored high on the MMSE test until near the end even though his memory was shot. It all depends on what area of the brain is affected.

    If you can fined a good primary who is knowledgeable in treating them and you trust them, then in my opinion there is no need for a neurologist. Some want to put their loved one through all the test probably hoping for a wrong diagnosis or a miracle.
    • CommentAuthoroakridge
    • CommentTimeMay 5th 2019
    I'm not really sure Mary, I suspect it's a combination of verses - so many passages appear similar in different books. Just a line I've heard forever. The first time was when a very elderly woman was dying - but kept living. Her husband and even some kids were long gone, when someone asked her what she thought, she said she just had to endure to the end.

    The race is not given to the swift nor the strong but he who endures until the end.

    I do like verse 7: I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith:

    Occasionally someone will say something has earned you a star in your crown in Heaven, but I sometimes wonder if it isn't the job - but in how we approach it that earns us a star.
    • CommentAuthorpaulc
    • CommentTimeMay 5th 2019
    I forgot to mention that 60 Minutes is showing a segment on FTD right now on the US East Coast. It will be available on the 60 Minutes web site later. Of course a golf game delayed it but they will still show the FTD segment.

    One of my FB friends was interviewed for it.