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  1.  
    My husband has been in-and-out of emergency rooms geriatric units for the past 8 months, Finally last Tuesday he was Put in a veteran home, 45 minutes from me I was going to see him everyday from 5 to 9:00 p.m. I would dance with him listen to music exercise go outside he needs the 1 to 1, But she doesn't get their, Everyone sits and watches TV he doesn't like TV. They told me today I shouldn't come and see him for a couple days maybe a week. We've been together for 50 years met in the 9th grade
    • CommentAuthorbhv*
    • CommentTimeMar 15th 2018
     
    Some members of this message board have been asked to stay away for a bit at the beginning to help their person get acclimated to the new place. If they didnt explain why they want you to stay away, please ask. It sounds wonderful what you do when you visit. I can't imagine they would want you to stop that! He is being cared for there but you are an invaluable member of the care team. It is new for you too and will.take time to find the best way to work together with them.
    • CommentAuthorWolf
    • CommentTimeMar 16th 2018
     
    Welcome to the board Stayhealthy. Many of us know what you're talking about.
  2.  
    Stayhealthy .............

    I agree with what bhv said. Why would they want you to stay away from him
    when he's only been there for a few days? This is usually a time when he needs
    you more than ever. And it sounds like you do so much for him.
    ................ Please let us know how this works out......
    • CommentAuthorRodstar43*
    • CommentTimeMar 17th 2018
     
    A fallen comrad needs visiting, how much more a fallen partner for life. Screw the so called know it alls.
    • CommentAuthorRona
    • CommentTimeMar 20th 2018
     
    I was one that was told to Back off and not come everyday. Two reasons one was so she could transfer her dependence on me to the staff and the second she was not accepting the placement was not nice to me and as a result they could see the stress this was causing me. There is not right answer here you have to go with what you feel is right for you and for your husband.h
    • CommentAuthorSedgly
    • CommentTimeMar 20th 2018
     
    I haven't been down this road yet with Dh but went down it with MIL and when they said don't come for a week I totally ignored them. She loved me and I was the one she depended on, no way was I going to chance her suffering the loss of losing me also..I went every day for the first couple weeks.. she adjusted..I agreed, there is no right answer... let your heart be your guide.
    • CommentAuthorNicky
    • CommentTimeApr 8th 2018
     
    ttt