I am shaking as I write this. Mim was in the death notices this morning. It says "arrangements are pending." I had not wanted to say this on the forum, but I've been checking the death notices daily in our Heartland newspaper, looking for Mim or Dan.
I don't post much, but often come on to check on everyone. I'm so sorry to hear that Mim didn't survive her brave battle. Thank you Elizabeth for keeping us informed. May she rest in peace.
Thank you for checking Elizabeth. We've been afraid this happened. I really liked Mim and miss her. We had some lovely times at the cottage on the lake. I am very sad.
Yes, a pretty woman. I feel bad for Dan--but he does have adult children in the area who I imagine will step up to the plate. Mim hadn't said much about them, but I felt like the vibe was positive.
Jazzy, that's a very good point. I have often wondered what happened to LFL, who was taking care of her husband at home because he had been kicked out of LTC. There are some others who I worry about, too, but I've mentioned them in earlier posts and won't belabor it here.
That's why I think it's important for us to say if we decide to stop posting, as you and Coco did,.
I have not been here for a while but when I saw this, it stopped me in my tracks. I'm so sorry to hear Mim died. I want to cry she was such a wonderful inspiration and contributor with the best advice. She will be missed, may she Rest In Peace. This is just sad...
Mim's obituary is in the Youngstown, Ohio Vindicator today. Google vindy.com, and click on Tributes. You will see Marilyn Faith Wojton, and you can click on "read full tribute." Note that when they mention "Poland"--that is a neighboring town. (Not the European country.)
I don't know why, but I can't get Mim's death out of my mind. It's not as though I was shocked - ovarian cancer is a killer and I had a bad feeling when she told us last summer that it had come back and after that when we didn't hear from her for so long. A few years ago, she wrote that had always wanted to travel to New England and see the fall colors. We were both taking care of our husbands then and I though that maybe someday, when it was possible for her, she could visit me and we could take a drive around the mountains.
It's strange not to ever actually meet someone but to care about them nonetheless. Maybe online support groups have downsides that I did not fully understand. This is the only one I've ever joined.
Yes, I don't believe in online friends, virtual relationships, and all that. I would no more go on a dating website than fly to the moon. Just seems silly to me--my "friends" are the people I sit down with in the bagel shop and have coffee with--but, boy--is this forum ever the exception. And when Mim and I did meet and used to get together at a coffee shop or on my back porch, we had sooooo much to talk about. It was as if we had known each other our whole lives. This death has hit me hard, too. There she was moving heaven and earth to get Dan taken care of, and ovarian cancer comes out of nowhere and kills her first. I can't help wondering whether somehow her immune system was compromised from all the fatigue and stress of caring for Dan, and her body was more vulnerable than it would have been otherwise. Like maybe if she wasn't already exhausted, the cancer might not have been able to get at her. Not at all scientific, but I wonder...
I do believe and know there is research to back up that stress weaken our immune system. We get headaches, high blood pressure, arthritis gets worse, our backs ache, and numerous other pains we get when under stress. When I was diagnosed with uterine cancer almost 4 years ago, that is not what I was expecting. Because I was never pregnant and other reasons I was high on the list for ovarian and breast cancer. They say we all have cancer cells but our immune system keeps it in check. Add stress, lack of sleep, etc - perfect setup for getting sick including cancer. I know when my stress level goes up every vulnerable place in my body hurts more.
As for online friendships - I have made some good ones over the years via Facebook. I think most I met playing games. In fact a couple I met playing games in Pogo. Two I met when I first got online in the 90s when I joined a depression support group and our friendship moved to Facebook. I have had friends I met online but never in person die and it hurt as much as in person friends. Unbelievably we are all Christians which I think has made the friendships deeper. I have met ones through this sites - met in spirit not in person.
My older brother met his wife online. Not through a dating site, but if I remember she was a friend of a friend of a friend he met online. She lived in the Pocono's and him in Virginia. They have been married 15 years. So anything is possible.
Thank you for letting us know Elizabeth. Such sad news. I am teary reading all the thoughtful comments in this thread. Thanks Wolf for passing on our condolences. RIP Mim.