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    • CommentAuthorLindylou
    • CommentTimeNov 4th 2017
    When did this journey start?

    I keep thinking about this question. I know for certain that it began for us shortly before my partner lost her job. I am certain now, and I think I was certain then, that I knew something was wrong when my partner spoke to me about adding an additional step to her daily work routine. I listened to her closely and followed her description of her new procedures. There was nothing wrong, that I could see, with how she was now doing things. But I could not, for the life of me, see the need for this additional added step. I believe now what was happening was that she was beginning to sense that something was wrong cognitively inside her, and she felt compelled to double check, triple check everything she did. It was shortly after this that her employer began the needed paper trail to dismiss their 20 year employee.

    But I ask myself, were there clues before that? What were they? There were a couple of “explainable” car accidents that in reality could have happened to anybody. But are there events or worries that I had then but I’ve forgotten completely about now?

    The reason I keep thinking about this is that immediately after her “enforced retirement” (so much easier to say than firing), in addition to applying for unemployment benefits we also began investigating Social Security Disability due to cognitive impairments. So something that was noticeable must have also been occurring at home. Darned if I can remember it now, though.

    The intersection from living the life we had anticipated living together to taking a forced turn onto the new road called dementia did begin for us when she lost her job. At that point everything began to change, although in the beginning we still had good times.
    • CommentAuthorbhv
    • CommentTimeNov 4th 2017 edited
    Good morning Lindylou.
    I have been wondering the same thing lately. I have been updating my estate plan and trying to write a letter to his sons. Years ago he boxed up their pictures and sent them a box telling them he would have no further contact with them. After that he kept bugging me to write wills to make sure they wouldnt get any of his money. I have no way to comprehend this. After about 15 years of having children in my home every summer, toilet training the youngest one three years in a row, they are finally adults we could have fun with and DH decides to eliminate them from our lives!?! WTF? When his oldest called to tell him he had a grandson he refused to take the call.
    Now I find myself wondering if that was AD. Perhaps he was searching for a cause of his angst. We had retired. We were helping his father learn to cook and care for his mother. I don't remember what year that was.
    • CommentAuthorWolf
    • CommentTimeNov 4th 2017
    Don't forget that what we're talking about is when it first became apparent to us. It was surely there before then.
    • CommentAuthorRona
    • CommentTimeNov 4th 2017
    I remember it was spring of 2006 Lisa's mother had a major stoke, she was very close to her parents, so when she started to show signs we thought it was from worry and stress. She was still working and was having trouble putting deals together. In hindsight it wasen't stress it was the first visible signs. Then she started having trouble reconciling our credit card bills something she always did. Took us until May of 2012 to finally get the diagnosis.

    When did it start well I read in a couple of threads cannot remember which ones where the question was asked about out of character behaviour years before any recognizable signs. I certainly noticed this in our relationship she is a very loving giving person but sometimes her behaviour was just bizarre just so out of character. I would just shake my head and think where did that come from there was no reasoning or logic. I often wonder if it wasen't Alzheimer's just popping it's head up.
    • CommentAuthorRodstar43
    • CommentTimeNov 4th 2017
    Lindylu, I have often thought the same. I became aware after DW had a TIA and then started having simple partial seizures. They came around every 5 weeks or so and that is when I started to notice memory lapses. That was in 2009. Now, I wonder if there were signs before that. I think wolf is right. When it finally became apparent too us. Who would anticipate this AD happening to our loved one?