Not signed in (Sign In)

Vanilla 1.1.2 is a product of Lussumo. More Information: Documentation, Community Support.

    • CommentAuthorLindylou
    • CommentTimeAug 31st 2017
     
    Several nights ago I came by, Myrtle, just as you were squeaking the porch door to sleep on the cot. I didn't say anything then, I just needed to be alone with the water and the stars.

    Now I'm back again because I don't want to think about decisions just now. Decisions will just have to wait until I get back home. I'm sliding the canoe out and taking it to the shallows on the other side of the lake. Sometimes its called the Stumpies. And I'm going to see how close I can sneak up on the snapping turtles before they slide off their logs and into the water. And I'm going to take the crumbs from my sandwich and feed them to the bluegills. And then I'm going to tie a rope to a stump, and lie on the bottom of the canoe with a pillow and let it just rock me back and forth. I'll look up at the pattern of leaves and sun. And just rest. In a very safe place.
  1.  
    Good night, Lindylou. I hope you can get a good rest while the canoe is rocking.
    • CommentAuthorbhv
    • CommentTimeSep 12th 2017
     
    All.weekend I kept wanting to come here and say "psssst, Lindylou, are you here? Maybe hiding in the canoe?" I couldn't get you and your partner out of my mind, but didn't want to interrupt. I am sittting at the end of the dock with two glasses of wine for when things quiet down at your house and you just want a quiet shoulder to lean on.

    Rodstar43, here is our cottage. There is a dock with a gazebo. There is a canoe we can paddle to the island and go blueberry picking. Poke your head in the kitchen and there will.be some kind of treat left for us or pitchers of lemonade and iced tea. There is a screened porch suitable for sleeping, although mosquitoes are not allowed here. Lindylou brought a grill so we can have a cookout any time it might please us. There are paths through the woods where the trees form a canopy above our heads and the dirt paths are so soft we can walk barefoot.
    • CommentAuthorLindylou
    • CommentTimeSep 12th 2017
     
    Ah, bhv, I have just a few precious moments right now. I'll soak my feet in the water and have that glass of wine. Thank you for waiting for me here.
    • CommentAuthorLindylou
    • CommentTimeSep 12th 2017
     
    bhv, my turn to pour two glasses of wine and save one for you down on the dock. You are beaten up and I am utterly exhausted. We don't have to talk, just sit side by side on the Adirondack chairs watching dusk fall over the lake. It is peaceful here. Can you hear the whip poor will?
    • CommentAuthorbhv
    • CommentTimeSep 12th 2017
     
    Oh Lindylou, thank you. I haven't heard the whip poor will in ever so long. How astonishingly nice!
    I am a bit worried about Wolf. I think he needs to come here right now and have a whiskey with us. I am so upset, I have been adding a bit of coke to my whiskey. Feeling guilty for drinking so much today, but feeling peaceful right now. FINALLY.
    I know I am 3,000 or more miles away from you and Wolf, but I feel like we are friends. I feel like there is a hole in the universe now with your partner gone. I am thinking I would have felt something similar when Wolf lost his Diane. I feel a little lost cause I never knew a love like that. But it makes me very pleased that such a love does actually exist! I can't thank you enough for sharing that! Lindylou, tears are streaming down my face. I am so happy you are here. I hope Wolf and Mim come by tonight.
    • CommentAuthorbobbie
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2017
     
    Lindylou, my thoughts are with you. When I first tried to visit here, I didn't understand. Now I do. May I come sit with you. I want to sit on the dock at sunset and put my my feet in the water. What happens if I splash water on you, i'm apt to do that
    • CommentAuthorbhv
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2017
     
    Hi bobbie. We don't mind if you splash. Glad you are here. You.aren't from Florida are you? I have a friend (of a friend) named Bobbie whose husband has Alzheimer's, in Spring Hill, FL
    • CommentAuthorLindylou
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2017
     
    You just might get splashed back, Bobbie. Welcome to a peaceful place far from all worries. And bring these peaceful feelings back with you when you have to leave. So glad to see you. Sunsets here are beautiful.
    • CommentAuthorWolf
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2017
     
    bhv, I'm sorry I wasn't there two days ago. I would have popped by.

    bobbie, I'm glad. It's just like opening up to reading a story except you're in the story and you're writing it. At least, that's how I look at it.

    Also, please don't splash any water on the body in the hammock because that belongs to me and if cold water suddenly and mysteriously splashed down on me, I could easily get twisted up in here like a cottage roll.

    With a little luck, what Lindylou is going through won't forever change her access to the fact that these places are here; they are always here; and they aren't weak or fragile, they're powerful and strong which is evidenced and has always been evidenced by this place, the lodge, the parties we had, the travelling pajamas, the eagles we watch, the jokes Don tells, Phranque, Operation Petticoat (Charlotte), and an endless host of specific examples that even while we turn on the spit and our liver is pecked out every day - we look for something good.

    I'm laying here imagining being the alien who was sent to earth to investigate them and is now reporting back:

    "Well they like a good laugh."
    "A what??"
    "They make their bodies shake and make appropriate sounds."
    "Why do they do that?"
    "Because something is funny."
    "Is that what you called their humour?"
    "No. Humour is what they called bodily fluid.
    "I'm don't understand what you're saying."
    "That might have been considered funny."
    "What was?"
    ...and so on.

    Of course it wouldn't be like that. Whatever's going on, it's not just going on here. We can argue about how or why it is, but there's no denying the rocks like stepping out. Aliens may not get our humor but I'm pretty sure they have a sense of it.

    I never lost Dianne. She's in the living room. She just doesn't do much these days although her very real and very right now pension comes in every month. Keep up the good work. And it's not like that anyway. We love talking like surfers on the now wave experiencing reality happening to us and there's no denying that hypnotizing aspect. A greater truth is that all of the experience we learn from is in the past because it has to have happened already to be experience. Why would this be any different? I'm still learning about us. I'm just slow.

    It's time to come out of the hammock, and in less than a blink that thought is in the past.
    • CommentAuthorWolf
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2017
     
    Hi Lindylou. Please consider banning winter from the cottage on the lake. Endless summer would be good.
    • CommentAuthorLindylou
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2017
     
    You know, Wolf, I was thinking that Columbus Day (AKA Indigenous Peoples' Day) was coming up and we would have to shut off the water and lock up. But, if we ban winter............................? We could canoe any time we wanted. We could dangle our feet in the water and splash a few drops on each other as we sip a glass of wine together at sunset.

    When we need winter there is the Christmas lodge and we can let our tears freeze in the corners of our eyes. When we need summer we can soak in the sun on an old inner tube, and read dusty old books from the book shelf. What do you say all?

    Wolf, so very nice to see you. If I should do a "cannon ball" I'll do it from the far side of the dock and nary a splash will hit you. Don't want you tangled in that hammock. :)
    • CommentAuthorbobbie
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2017
     
    Nice to be a guest. Not from Florida, I am from dry West Texas. That is why I like visiting a cottage on the lake so much. What kind of pajamas do we need to bring? I don't have see thru ones, and I would love to sit out at night. I love winter, so tell me about the Christmas cottage.
    • CommentAuthorbhv
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2017
     
    Any PJs will do.
    Wolf and Lindylou, I totally agree we should ban winter at the cottage on the lake. It should always be warm enough to go swimming, canoeing, pick blueberries, or just sit on the dock with our feet in the water.
    Oh Bobbie.... the Christmas Lodge is sooooo magical. I barely survived last Christmas and would not have got through the holiday season at all, at all, if not for the lodge. Can hardly wait. You can find it if you use the search tab. But I think we will all find our way there sometime in November. I tried to describe it to a friend from the real (non alzheimer) world and her eyes got real.wide and she said how do you find a place like that? I believe Wolf created it, but so many of us have chimed in to add details and fun.
    It is always winter there. I went there in the middle of the summer because I needed some alone time. I went skating even though in the real.world it was 110 degrees.in the shade! What fun.
    • CommentAuthorbobbie
    • CommentTimeSep 16th 2017
     
    Sounds good to me. I'll bring my crochet and you can help me with the magic loop.

    Will you be taking a bus from the lake to the Christmas Cottage. I can usually manage to get lost.
    • CommentAuthorWolf
    • CommentTime7 days ago
     
    Bobbie,

    When I saw that christmas was harder to get through for many, I invented the christmas lodge as a place that isn't about christmas, it's just that it's open then. The main theme is a huge rambling lodge that always has a fire going in the large fireplace and plenty of comfortable chairs to lounge in, a large kitchen which guests are welcome to take over, and last year I added two heavy horses and took those who wanted on a sleigh ride through the winter night wrapped in blankets with hot cider or mulled wine. Daisy was one of the names of the horses but I can't remember the other one. Someone else invented a skating party. Some else made something in the kitchen and told everyone they could have some. Two rules: no calories and your room is always ready.

    When Lindylou wanted the cottage by the lake she referred to that lodge and asked me about this. Myrtle jumped in and created this thread for her, and as we can see, it has it's own life now.

    I believe they're meant to be the same thing. A place for us to mentally get away and put our feet up for a bit, to which we already belong. We all have a bond by life experience and there is little need to explain that because we all already know.

    Ultimately we learn to authorize a moment and, if we do, then we've experienced that moment in a way not dissimilar to enjoying a moment in a book we might be reading or a movie we might be watching. Whatever else, they're meant to be a safe place with people we share this journey with to put our feet up for a little while.

    We might participate, we might watch, we might know they're here, or we might think it's a foreign thing. It's all about self authorization which is a skill we'll need and a diversion we may need now. Change need to want.
    • CommentAuthorbobbie
    • CommentTime7 days ago
     
    I want no fear and no danger at the cottage. I want to put on my old lady swim suit and go swimming at night. Just to float in the dark water and sky, looking at the stars No snapping turtles,no snakes-----just beauty and safety. No decisions, no questions, just beauty and rest.
  2.  
    Beauty, peace, rest, joy...and all good things.
    • CommentAuthorbhv
    • CommentTime7 days ago edited
     
    That's it exactly Wolf and Bobbie. There are no dangers allowed.
    I am still chuckling about taking the bus from the lake to the lodge. In my mind I go for a walk here at my southern calif house and turn the corner and poof! There's the lodge or the cottage. It's kind of like tapping your heels together in your.sparkling red shoes.
    Wolf you captured the sense of magic. I kept wondering why reading a new book doesn't create the same sense of magic. The key is here the people know what THIS is like and we don't have to explain. We are not judged. There are no snapping turtles. No mosquitoes. No noisy motorboats. No spouses offering to harm us. No spouses demanding anything.
    I forgot to tell Bobbie about the horses. Yeah. They.were a wonderful diversion last winter. It was funny that we had to wait until Daisy was in the mood for a.sleigh ride. She had a definite personality.

    I think another reason the cottage and the lodge and the monthly threads work so well for us is we don't have to ask a question to talk to each other. I mean every day is so similar to the last, only more boring which you don't think can possibly be true.
    • CommentAuthorLindylou
    • CommentTime6 days ago
     
    Thought I might see some of you guys here, and I was right. No snakes, no snappers, Bobbi, just a bull frog croaking off and on, and a whip poor will singing in the early evening, and occasional fish jumping in the water and making a splash. I feel tonight like being mesmerized by a small bonfire on the beach so I've dragged a few chairs over and set up the wood for later. Bring what you want if you want to come. I'm bringing marshmallows, mostly for the chance to use skill in toasting them just tan enough to melt with no char on them. Any and all are welcome. I've been sleeping a lot. Its nice to come here and collect myself. Taking a swim now.
  3.  
    I imagine the crickets are chirping in the background. Enjoy the cottage tonight, everyone!
    • CommentAuthorbobbie
    • CommentTime6 days ago
     
    Who put up the nice steps, with thehand rail? Was that Wolf. I hadn't noticed them, but it is so nice to walk slowly into the water and then just float. As handy as BHV has gotten maybe she built them.
    • CommentAuthorLindylou
    • CommentTime17 hours ago
     
    Sitting on the dock with my support hose off and dangling my feet in the water. Only hearing a few cicadas. This is a safe place, a place to rest before tomorrow in the other world arrives.
    • CommentAuthorbhv
    • CommentTime16 hours ago
     
    Lindylou I am here with you I am not sure what you need right now. Perhaps just to be together. Do you have someone there with you? I am 3 hours earlier than you are. Do you.want to call? Probably not. I think we should just sit here. I feel like tears should be streaming down my face. I am having difficulty breathing with worry for you. But no tears. Too disappointed in human beings. But thankfully there are some human beings.like you and your partner and I am honored to know and care for you both.
    • CommentAuthorLindylou
    • CommentTime15 hours ago
     
    Just sit beside me for a time, bhv, as my son and his wife did this morning, and one of my brothers did this afternoon. I am surrounded by love. I am blessed. It is just that I hurt so much. I will sleep tonight surrounded by the love of generous folks who know how to reach out and lend a helping hand. Sometime it would be really cool to meet you bhv. As I have met Myrtle. But right now, you are as real and caring to me as anyone I know. Thank you for generosity even in the face of all you deal with.
    • CommentAuthorbhv
    • CommentTime15 hours ago
     
    I am relieved. I am glad you have brothers. I love my brothers. I will sit with you.
    • CommentAuthormyrtle*
    • CommentTime14 hours ago edited
     
    Lindylou, I just put fresh sheets on the bed in the second floor room that overlooks the lake. Climb right in when you feel like it. i plugged a nightlight in so you won't be scared if you wake up. Bhv will be guarding the place all night so unwanted in-laws will not be able to get in and create more chaos. Our other friends will be here in the morning. Sleep tight.
    •  
      CommentAuthormary75*
    • CommentTime14 hours ago
     
    This is so bad, it's evil. I've joined the others to sit with you. The love we all feel for you and your partner will help overcome help overcome the darkness.
  4.  
    Yes, I am here now. I am guarding you, too, with the others. Sleep, Lindylou. We are right here.