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    • CommentAuthorLindylou
    • CommentTimeJan 23rd 2017
     
    Charlotte, take the hospice hours any way you can. Use them in different ways. Find what works for you. You will be surprised, I think, at the change you have in tension and worry. You will be used to using it by the time you get around to feeling you really need it. It will take away your worrying about is everything really okay. Certain kinds of help worked for me, other kinds did not. Going out evenings did not work. Experiment. Sometimes we feel we have to carry the whole load. Sometimes we do, but sometimes help is there if we use it. Love, Lindylou.
  1.  
    Talking about winter--another nor'easter coming in this afternoon. I went and got some groceries, then walked Bandit for an hour and a half down by the creek that flows into the Hudson--very picturesque down there, with a promenade along the creek--have to take the car , but it's only a couple of miles and less than five minutes to get down there. I hope he's settled down enough that when I want to just read or watch DVDs and watch the "wintry mix" out the window, he will take a nap or something. Boy, do I hate "wintry mix." It's almost as bad as "freezing rain."
    • CommentAuthormyrtle
    • CommentTimeJan 23rd 2017
     
    Someone asked me if I would show the inside of the shed and I finally found a picture of it and put it up. However, the program on this site crops the edges so much that it turns the picture into a close-up. All you can see is part of the baker's rack and the two wicker chairs in front of it. What you can't see are the rag rug, the double windows on each side, the blue table under one window, the bookcase under the other window, the dried lavender hanging from a beam, and the antique tools and other decorations. But this will give you an idea.
    • CommentAuthorcassie*
    • CommentTimeJan 23rd 2017 edited
     
    That was me, Myrtle. It looks (sounds) delightful (love the wood.) I am coming to visit, with a nice bottle of wine to fill those glasss and to sit beside you, on one of the chairs.
    I am sure that we would have much to talk about!
    • CommentAuthorWolf
    • CommentTimeJan 23rd 2017
     
    Myrtle,

    You might try shrinking the original picture with a picture management program and saving it with a new filename (I usually add an 'a' at the end of whatever filename the camera gave it. If you have excel and word you might also have Picture Manager but Paint can do it and so can some other resident picture viewing programs. You can usually check by right clicking on the image and seeing what options "open with" give you.

    Joan's site can only take a maximum size and it's true that the resident program here takes whatever middle of the picture is in that scope and cuts off all the edges. By shrinking the picture you bring more of the picture into that middle zone it can handle.

    If you like, you can email me the picture and I'll shrink it for you and send it back. No need to reply to that.

    Nice shed.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLjS3gzHetA

    That's the thing about Monty Python you see you never quite know where they're going and I didn't either. Nevermind.
    •  
      CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeJan 23rd 2017
     
    Looks like a great setup.
    • CommentAuthormyrtle
    • CommentTimeJan 25th 2017
     
    A program about the social and financial costs of Alzheimer's will air tonight on PBS at 10:00 ET/9:00 CT.
    • CommentAuthormyrtle
    • CommentTimeJan 26th 2017
     
    Wolf, Where can I email it to?
    •  
      CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeJan 27th 2017
     
    This was posted by Kim Campbell. I don't have music from my husband to be remembered of what we have lost like Kim does. I love what she posted.

    http://www.careliving.org/beautiful-love-song/
    • CommentAuthorWolf
    • CommentTimeJan 27th 2017
     
    Sorry Myrtle, I missed this earlier, but we've connected now so it's all good.

    Thanks Mary.
    • CommentAuthormyrtle
    • CommentTimeJan 28th 2017 edited
     
    Thanks to Wolf, I was able to put a picture of the inside of "The Hermitage" on my account profile. So step right in, cassie. Here's a corkscrew for the wine.

    What I wanted to say about this is that this idea came to me one day last Spring when I was thinking, "I am so miserable. What can I do to make myself happier?" I was looking out at the back yard and my eyes rested on the shed. I had to remove a lot of my husband's possessions (buckets of driveway tar, old window air conditioners, a broken leaf blower, etc.). Almost everything I put in there was something I already had, either in the shed, the garage, the basement, or a closet. I only bought two items - the baker's rack ($50 on craigslist) and the rag rug ($30 at TJMaxx). For me, doing something creative helps to ward off the misery of this disease, at least for a while.

    P.S. added on Sunday 1/29/2017 @ noon:
    Wolf just edited the image again to add the name of the building. He said he was having "a last bit of fun" with the task and I realized that "fun" was the whole purpose of my doing this in the first place. For me, "fun" is a partial antidote to the stress, anxiety and sorrow brought on the Alz experience. Thanks for the insight, Wolf.
    • CommentAuthorLindylou
    • CommentTimeJan 28th 2017
     
    Love the shed, Myrtle. Wish it wasn't the wrong season, else wise you could go sit out there, let the breezes waft over you and let this last battle with NH drift away. Glad you stood up for your husband and yourself.
    • CommentAuthorMim
    • CommentTimeJan 28th 2017
     
    Myrtle, I love your she-shed! Looks so inviting.
    • CommentAuthorcassie*
    • CommentTimeJan 28th 2017
     
    Myrtle, it really is as lovely as the tiny peek before promised.
  2.  
    Well, I'm impressed! That is one cosy shed! (I didn't know how others were accessing the picture, so just clicked on your name, Myrtle, in the heading of one of your posts, and there it was. Easy-peasy.)
    • CommentAuthorWolf
    • CommentTimeJan 29th 2017
     
    Myrtle,

    In reply to your PS from yesterday, I think that a few years ago I was too stressed and detached to understand whether I was having 'fun' or not. That whole aspect of enjoying myself wasn't something I understood, thought about, or was capable of. I don't exaggerate. Nothing like that crossed my mind because my mind was extremely busy and occupied with coping through Dante's Inferno while everyone I knew before was getting smaller on the horizon still running away screaming.

    This experience became all consuming. It broke me down to a nub. It obliterated my life. It pushed 'me' into a tiny corner. Then, finally, it killed her and spat me out into an alien world - ten years older. What's not to like?

    But you know what? It did do that. I've got the scars right here. I've got her urn right here. And the best way I can describe my response is to lift my hand and my middle finger up in salute. Up yours.

    Even as I type time marches on away from the point where genius Alzheimer's died with her. And some of my friends are drifting back. "Look! No Alzheimer's! It's safe to come out now!" In this best of all possible worlds, it's best to remember what my mother used to say. And I could tell you what my mother used to say, but I don't know what my mother said, because I didn't listen!

    Nevermind. I'm still not listening. I'm on a rock that is run, quite charitably, in a way that isn't completely incoherent although quite obviously not terribly thought out. I may not know how other parts of the plan work but that doesn't mean I'm not looking at - never mind living in - their work right now. Could do better. I'm just saying.

    Look. There are two stories. In one all this happened and I never recovered. In the other all this happened and I've got the t-shirt. I'm not hoping for anything. I chose and in every fight it was the same opponent - me, every single time. Not me as in being my own enemy - me as in being broken here too. I've spent two years being a nurse and a repairman. I don't charge either.

    In my mind there have to be things in the now that take on meaning. If we can't do that we have to survive until we can do that. Your new alien world takes on meaning afterwards when you give that meaning to things in it. It has taken a long time to come to a condition where I can understand that.

    So. When I saw you post your name for the shed I realized it might help create meaning to visually put the name of the thing on the image of the thing so they could become more of the thing and maybe take on more meaning.

    It is our meaning that is one main thing under siege during this time. Mine went away. Gone. No thought of missing it or ever having it. Just surviving. I'll tell you something. We had fair weather lifelong friends but the most disappointing showing was by the willingness of many aspects of my personality to hang in there with me. They flocked off. They've come back now. Hello! It turns out long torture does things to you. Who knew?

    I wasn't able to settle down enough until eighteen months later. I think it's different for most everyone. Only after that over the next months did I start to feel really, fully, and truly like myself again. Hello! Like finding old favourite slippers that still fit like a glove. I've changed I'm sure and I've aged but I've found my way to a lot of peace inside and that has brought me to another new place. Feeling OK and having a life are two different things.

    On we go.
    •  
      CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeJan 29th 2017
     
    Article about attemped euthanasia of a dementia patient in Netherlands.

    http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/euthanasia-patient-fought-back-doctor-9707709
    •  
      CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeJan 31st 2017 edited
     
    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooo

    January is going out as it came in with snow. Woke up to 1 1/2 inches and still snowing. It is suppose to warm up to 37 so it should mostly melt at least on the roads. Today was my last PT which approval expires today - don't think I will make it. The roads are probably fine, but still have the snow covered roads in the park. Tomorrow hopefully will make to doctor appointment that had to cancel due to weather two weeks ago so he can order more PT. The physical therapist wants another month of twice a week and two months weekly.

    Goodbye January!

    Update: I did make it out to PT. Once I got out of the park the roads were clear. Nice that the ground was not frozen.
  3.  
    Has been snowing here for six hours. 'Tis the season!
  4.  
    And I'm walking around in shirt slevees down here in sunny Central Florida, after a couple of coolish (for us) evenings that bottomed out in the mid 40s.
  5.  
    Central heating is a wondrous thing. Snow outside; shirtsleeves inside. The best of both worlds.

    Let us all sing praises to Amana, Carrier, Goodman, etc. and electricity or clean natural gas that doesn't have to be shoveled twice a day or leave everything covered in soot. Thank you modern technology for year round comfort (that many of us now take for granted).
  6.  
    Myrtle, the Wall Street Journal has an article today (that should be accessible in a day or two) entitled, "The Man Cave Has a New Neighbor - The She Shed."

    You are rockin' with the times and inspiring us.
    • CommentAuthormyrtle
    • CommentTimeFeb 1st 2017 edited
     
    marche, I'll definitely read the WSJ article when it becomes available to the public. As it happens, I read your post about modern technology last night, as I was watching a documentary about the first public subway system in the U.S., and marveling at the boldness and creativity of those engineers and inventors of the late 19th and early 20th centuries. Charlotte and elizabeth, We got hit with snow, too, but not very much. It seems that every winter bothers me more and I often think about what it would be like to live in a warmer climate, like Gourdchipper, but then I think of the folks on this site (like Joan, Elizabeth, MaryinPA, and Jazzy), who moved just before or just as Alz struck and were not able to make many friends in their new areas. Even though I will someday be on my own, the thought of trying to make new friends in a strange area at my age scares me. Maybe it makes more sense to rely on already-existing friends for companionship and on modern technology for warmth. But the thought of sunshine and shirtsleeves in January sure is tempting.
    • CommentAuthorpaulc
    • CommentTimeFeb 1st 2017
     
    I believe that having a good social network is more important than the weather. So convince all of your friends to move south with you.
  7.  
    Myrtle, if you live long enough you'll find it necessary to make new friends anyhow -- you'll have outlived most of the old ones, and the others will likely be too crippled or demented to be much company anyhow. New wife Joyce and I both have birthdays this week, turning 179 years old between the two of us, and virtually all of our old friends are gone. I looked up some statistics yesterday, and if I read them correctly, only 4% of males born in my birth year of 1928 are still alive today, and only a few more for females. We were close friends with an older couple who both lived to be 100, and one thing we learned from them was to keep making younger friends. Even in their 90s they still entertained, had duplicate bridge boards going with multiple couples, etc. -- making a determined effort to remain connected and relevant. Departed wife Frances and I made and maintained lots of younger friends through hobby activities like gourding and bluegrass music, but Joyce and I are forced to do it less so because she has health issues that limit us.
  8.  
    Myrtle, I think if you moved South to some kind of seniors complex, there would probably be a built-in social system. Maybe a place like The Villages in Florida would be nice. I don't know a thing about it--am just talking out of my hat--but others may chime in.

    I like a four-season climate, as long as I don't have to drive in the bad weather. (i.e. don't have to go out to work every day). What I find with the dog, though, is that I am out in all weathers five or six times a day. Sometimes I get tired of being cold. (Whine, whine, whine.) But I know it is good for me, and keeps me in touch with nature--here in NY I see deer all the time, also squirrels, rabbits, hawks, and I heard a barred owl, ("Whoooo--cooks---for---you, Whooooo---cooks--for--you") It has a loud and very distinctive hoot. Anyway, it isn't so much the snow, it is the ice and "wintry mix." I hate ice. Ice is my enemy.

    Not to get too off-topic, but Venus in the evening has been really beautiful. And if you look carefully, Mars is up there, too, in the same general area. Looks like a little, faint, red dot.
  9.  
    I understand that The Villages has the highest STD rate in the state, so those seniors there must be doing something right (or wrong).
    • CommentAuthormyrtle
    • CommentTimeFeb 3rd 2017
     
    marche, I found the article on another website (mansionglobal.com). It looks like some of these sheds are enormous and quite luxurious. One described in the article is a 2-story 20x20 structure that cost more than $80,000! (My shed 8x12 shed was already there and cost $80 to decorate, thanks to all the junk I had.)
  10.  
    Geesh. That's the WSJ for you. You should see the real estate section. It gives new meaning to the phrase "richer than God." I didn't read the article, but I thought the headline was fitting. So be it. I like your shed and the whole idea behind so much better. You need to give your shed a name, if you haven't already.

    And, Gordchipper, if older folks are getting STDs then they are definitely doing something wrong. De Nile.
    • CommentAuthormyrtle
    • CommentTimeFeb 6th 2017
     
    Hi marche, it has a name: "The Hermitage." If you click on my name, you will see that my artistic director (Wolf) added the name to the photo!
  11.  
    My Gosh, myrtle, that is one sweet little shed! Was it a shed with windows or did you put the windows in? They totally make it a sunlit haven as well as your vintage chic decorating flair. Wish I could amble over to The Hermitage and discuss books over steaming coffee and digestive biscuits!
    • CommentAuthorcassie*
    • CommentTimeFeb 6th 2017
     
    You are classier than me Marche, I was just joining Myrtle in her shed to get "on the drink" with her!
  12.  
    We are in luck, cassie*, it looks like there is room for a third chair as well as a teapot, a coffee mug and a wine glass. And, I have to admit that every time I hear the English term "digestive biscuit," it makes me chuckle but it seemed to fit into the quaintness of the transformed shed.
    • CommentAuthorcassie*
    • CommentTimeFeb 6th 2017
     
    Yes Marche, it is a quaint term and I always smile too when I come across it.
    I might google it for a bit more info.
    • CommentAuthormyrtle
    • CommentTimeFeb 6th 2017
     
    The shed seats 4. There is a simple oak kitchen chair just off the lower right of the picture and a low plastic gardener's seat on wheels just off the lower left. The windows were in the shed when we bought it as a tool shed many years ago. That was one reason I chose it. We will need a Coleman stove or something to heat the water for the tea because there is no electric power.