I had my own notion of grief I thought it was the sad time Following the death of someone you love And you had to push through it To get to the other side But I am learning there is no other side No pushing through it But rather There is absorption Adjustment Acceptance And grief is not something you complete But rather, you endure Grief is not a task to finish And move on But an element of yourself An alteration of your being A new way of seeing A new definition of self
Wow, Amber. That is beautiful. The words (grief is) "an element of yourself, an alteration of your being" really spoke to me. Any time I can find something that somehow clarifies what is going on in my head and heart, helps me persevere.
I copied that one. My mom and dad and my sister have been gone for several years now. In a space of such a short time I lost many members of my family. Every so often, I will feel an overwhelming grief at the losses . I remember so much of my early life now, the good parts, with my family members who are gone, and that is good, but with my husband going now too, the losses have mounted up and sometimes I feel very alone, even though I have wonderful children and their families, which I am so grateful for.
Amber, thanks so much for sharing that - I had also seen it on Facebook a couple of weeks ago and immediately copied it out. Here is another thought on grief from the writer Anne Lamott which was right on the money for me:
"You will lose someone you can't live without, and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn't seal back up. And you come through. It's like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly - that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp."