There is a Christmas tea on Saturday and there was to be only six of us including DH but his son called texted me to tell me his two sons and their girlfriends were coming as well. That put us over so DD said she would go to the dinner with our son and his wife coming from Alberta overnight. I decided to go to that and Kevan was quite happy with that. At 20:15 last night he called me and he is in such a state of upset I found out he had become terrified about going with out me. His stomach was upset and he was just so frightened. I assured him I would go and he calmed down and went and got Ativan and an antacid. This morning he called at 07:15 to wish me happy anniversary. Our son had reminded him. It's progression and so now there will be no more taking him out without me and no more big restaurant outings. It's just to much for him. This all started on Thursday when his other son called to tell him he wasn't coming to see him for Christmas. He was on his way to his home in California. Kevan hasn't been good since then. I wish I could boot this kid to the curb and cut off his phone calls as well. This kids very wealthy and his motto is" if you can't do anything for me you can't be part of my life" this includes his terminally ill Father. He used to be such a kind, loving person who would give you the shirt off his back even if he only had one. Money sure changed him. You know about the wicked step- mothers? Well I have a wicked step-son. It's only in the last few years that I have started to think of him as my step-son. Sad situation. I now have to decide wether to restrict his calls and his one visit a year.
It sounds confusing to me, and as far as I know, I don't have Alzheimers. (knock wood). Your story just reinforces what we all probably know--for our spouses' sake, the holidays need to be pleasantly low-key, without a lot of hoo-ha that will just make them anxious and confused. And unfortunately, we can pick our friends, but we can't pick our family.
Is this the same son who caused the ruckus in September and who was asked not call Kevan directly about scheduling or cancelling visits and instead to coordinate his visits through you? I agree with Elizabeth that this sounds very confusing even to someone with all their marbles. I'm not surprised that Kevan was unable to process all this. I really sympathize with you, Jazzy. You have your hands full here.
Same son. Pain in the butt for 44 years!! This will be the last big function. Now I have to go out to dinner with him and his other son Wednesday night. Yes this is what we all dread. I used to love the season but now I just dread it.
I used to dread the holiday season, too, but now I see it as just something I have to put up with. It's like having a crown put on a tooth - it's uncomfortable and time-consuming and it takes months to pay it off.