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    • CommentAuthordeb42657
    • CommentTimeFeb 27th 2015
     
    Sorry it has been so long since I have written, I have never forgotten all of you though. I have been busy trying to start my new life! I finally found out what happened to my ex husband. Just 3 days ago I was told he was in a NH. I don't think the elder meant to tell me that but he let it slip. The reason I am writing today is because I went through so many different emotions after finding out. The most surprising one has been embarrassment that I wasn't able to take care of him myself. Most of us feel quilt! All I know is things did not turn out the way I imagined it turning out. The elder that "let it slip" said that he would try to find out more but...
    • CommentAuthorLFL
    • CommentTimeFeb 27th 2015
     
    deb42657, thanks for letting us know you're okay. I was thinking about you a week or so ago and wondered what had happened.

    Your situation was so complicated and emotional when you were going through it, hopefully you've found some peace. You have nothing to be embarrassed or guilty about - this is a difficult disease for any caregiver...you did your best and that's all you could do.
  1.  
    Deb, good to hear from you. Lose the guilt and embarrassment! You did all could do - and then more. Take care of you, now.
    • CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeFeb 27th 2015
     
    Good to hear from you. It would be so nice if this person keeps you informed about him. Even though you are divorced, which you did not want, you still love the guy. It is no threat to them to let you know.

    Has your disability ever been approved or are they still dragging it out? I hope not.
    • CommentAuthordeb42657
    • CommentTimeFeb 27th 2015
     
    Of course...they are still dragging it out! This is the third appeal and the case goes before a judge in this phase and the lawyer says it is this phase where the best results come about. The last appeal took 5 months and I am expecting this one to take about the same. So some time between June and August it should be accepted. I did do my best with my H and even though I don't love him any more I do still care about him. I hope the elder keeps me informed too but the elder that took him to the airport might make that difficult for him to do. Thanks for continuing to think about me. Even though I am no longer directly involved in caring for someone with alzheimer's I do care about the affect it has on all of you and still kind of has on myself for that matter.

    I still see a psychiatrist and have a great deal of panic and ptsd still.
  2.  
    What a time you've had with all this. I wondered where you had got to and if you were OK. It's good to hear that you're taking care of yourself and working on your own good life. Stay in touch when you get a chance.
    • CommentAuthordeb42657
    • CommentTimeFeb 27th 2015
     
    Thanks elizabeth! I have become a lot stronger than I use to be. It is very true that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Of course I am sure that the meds I am taking have been helping too. So I think I would also say that if you need to take anti-depressants or something like that don't be afraid to do it, or don't think it is a sign of weakness. It actually takes a strong woman to know when she can't handle everything on her own without help!