My apologies for being so late in welcoming many of you. If you read today's (9/25/14), you know that I have been a bit overwhelmed with my husband's issues lately. There has been little energy left over to devote to the website. I started this website in 2007 because I couldn't find anyone who would talk about how I felt - I thought I was the only one feeling the way I did about what Alzheimer's Disease was doing to my marriage. I needed a place that dealt with my unique issues as a spouse of an Alzheimer patient. This site is now a place of comfort for spouses/partners who are trying to cope with the Alzheimer's/dementia of their husband/wife/partner. The issues we face in dealing with a spouse/partner with this disease are so different from the issues faced by children and grandchildren caregivers. We discuss all of those issues here - loss of intimacy; social contact; conversation; anger; resentment; stress; and pain of living with the stranger that Alzheimer's Disease has put in place of our beloved spouse/partner.
The message boards are only part of this website. Please be sure to log onto the home page - www.thealzheimerspouse.com - and read all of the resources on the left side. I recommend starting with "Newly Diagnosed/New Member" and "Understanding the Dementia Experience".
Do not miss the "previous blog" section. It is there you will find a huge array of topics with which you can relate. Everything you are feeling - anger, guilt, roller coaster of emotions, - all of it is “normal” for an Alzheimer Spouse, and only another such spouse can understand how we truly feel. There is a "search" feature on the home page that allows you to look up different topics that may have been explored in a previous blog. If you are feeling it, chances are excellent that I have written about feeling the same way. Log onto the home page daily for new blogs; news updates; important information.
Darlene – It took me 7 months to adjust to my husband living in the nursing home. It is devastating and difficult, but necessary for both of you. Check out my blogs from August, September, October, November of 2013. Hopefully, they will help you.
Thank you so much for the welcome, Joan - your site is an absolute godsend. Everyone I know has had the dementia experience (including me) with their parents only. And as all us here know, the experience of having a spouse with dementia is unique. I admire you and thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to put together this website while you are in the throes of your own pain and grief. I am not just blowing smoke when I tell you that I would have had a complete physical and mental collapse without this site. The members here are the only ones telling me the real story of living with a spouse who has this terrible disease. I raised hell today at the Memory Care center for not telling me the things I need to know. Finally the Social Worker said, "Frankly, we are used to dealing with spouses who really DON'T want to know, because the truth is so painful for them". I assured her it is painful for me also, but in these last phases of my dear husband's life, I need to know the complete truth. That is what I get from this site. It is not "misery loves company" here - we are all survivors and fighters, doing our best for our loved ones and ourselves. Bless all of us, and especially you, Joan.