I'm so delighted (if that's the right term) to find this site! My husband had early onset dementia in his 60's, he's now 79. We've been married for 37 years. Both of his parents had ALZ and died in their 80's in a home. I had to admit Ray to a home 18 mos ago as I could no longer handle him because he also has Parkinson louies so he's now in a wheelchair and can hardly stand. It's been a heartbreaking experience and I find that most of the other residents are mothers or fathers, not spouses. I changed my whole life to try and keep him, selling our home and retirement home, moving to a condo, etc. It's costing me a small fortune to keep him where he is (private pay only). I'm 67 and my doc has suggested I consider a separation agreement to begin thinking of me again and take a step back from my situation. Divorce is definitely out of the question as he will be my husband till the end - has anyone ever just gotten a legal separation?
Welcome to my website. It is late;I am in bed writing on my tablet, so I will give you a more extensive welcome in the morning. Just know that you have come to the right place. Only other spouses understand what Alzheimer Spouses go through.
What is it that the doctor thinks will be accomplished with a legal separation? I would strongly suggest contacting a certified elder law attorney for advice on monetary issues. Initial consultation is free.
I have been counselled to get an 'involuntary separation' that will separate our finances so then I can apply for some financial assistance for his care. This is the only benefit in doing a separation (in Canada anyway).
Good morning. I started this website in 2007 because I couldn't find anyone who would talk about how I felt - I thought I was the only one feeling the way I did about what Alzheimer's Disease was doing to my marriage. I needed a place that dealt with my unique issues as a spouse of an Alzheimer patient. This site is now a place of comfort for spouses/partners who are trying to cope with the Alzheimer's/dementia of their husband/wife/partner. The issues we face in dealing with a spouse/partner with this disease are so different from the issues faced by children and grandchildren caregivers. We discuss all of those issues here - loss of intimacy; social contact; conversation; anger; resentment; stress; and pain of living with the stranger that Alzheimer's Disease has put in place of our beloved spouse/partner.
The message boards are only part of this website. Please be sure to log onto the home page - www.thealzheimerspouse.com - and read all of the resources on the left side.
Do not miss the "previous blog" section. It is there you will find a huge array of topics with which you can relate. There is a "search" feature on the home page that allows you to look up different topics that may have been explored in a previous blog. Log onto the home page daily for new blogs; news updates; important information.
None of us will be able to give you any suggestions without a little more information about why you received the advice to separate. I cannot stress enough the importance of contacting a Certified Elder Law Attorney.