Coco, I am so sorry for your loss. You have been such an inspiration to all of us and we grieve for you and with you. Peace and comfort be with you in the days ahead. Dorie
And thank you for sharing your painful journey. The time you took to post your experiences was an enormous gift to all of us traveling the road. Peace.
Coco, my heart is breaking for you ((hugs)) I hope you find comfort that Dado was able to look so deeply into your eyes, I know he saw there the powerful love you have for him. Aloha Dado, you will be deeply missed..... Much love Coco, Love you ♥
Coco--I'm glad you were with Dado when he passed. I hope that you will be able to continue your advocacy on behalf of those with dementia and find that it's a comfort, as I do. XXOO
Coco, you have my deepest sympathy. I'm glad you could be with him during those final hours. Those memories will give you the greatest comfort and strength in the days ahead. Please take care of yourself.
I am here. Thank you all so very much. I am surviving better than I thought I would. His service will be in Maui next weekend, I will be flying his ashes over. I will post his obituary when it comes out later. Perhaps someone could give me my star, and the date of 7/23/2014.
I will have much to offer along with our other widowers when I am feeling better. We will make it. Really tough. But we will.
Only you and I can get into your account to put up a star. I will try it, but I may need some personal information from you. If that is the case, I will send you a personal email. I am unable to get to it until tomorrow night.
Coco, I am just getting caught up with the news here at "Joan's" place for Alz spouses. I was so sorry to read you lost Dado..You did such a wonderful job taking care of him..and he knew it too. These next days will be intense with memorial services etc. Let those who love you surround you and uplift you and help you too. Arms Around..
I am not able to change your screen name to include the star. Charlotte posted this for MaryinPA:
Charlotte 19 hours ago edit delete To put the star click on account on the top, then personal information. IF I am correct make sure you change your sign in name to match right down to spacing.
It apparently worked, because right after Charlotte posted this, MaryinPA had her star. Thank you Charlotte.
thank you Joan, I had a special helper. Thank you helper.
I will post more soon. Just really still not believing. We will have his service August 9 in Hana Maui, and I feel that will be a turning point. I can't totally let him go yet.
Let go of what you want, when you want and if you want. Hang on to memories, feelings and thoughts, whatever might comfort you. And, as time goes on you may find that these sets of feelings trade places over and over again.
Sending love and support.
Edited by me because I posted the same comment twice.
Mahalo nui, thank you so much for your generous and caring hearts.
I am outwardly apparently very strong, they tell me I am so strong and am doing so well. And I suppose I am. But I know that only we ourselves can experience the deep grief and hurt, no one can really understand except the people here, and others like us. Just because I can carry a conversation on about the weather, or the garden, does not mean I am really in to it. Even at this time, I try to be kind and polite, but sometimes I just want to say...I cannot hear you, please stop talking. Most people are sweet, and yet some are horrid.
I have to put this in. I saw a couple I know and told them about Dado. As I went to use their bathroom, I could hear the woman saying quietly to her husband, ""My diabetes is likely going to kill me soon, so you can always get together with "her"
Honestly as I was in the bathroom, it made me kind of giggle at the absurdness.
Tomorrow I leave for Maui to spend 5 days for Dado's services in his hometown of Hana Maui. When people ask, how many people do you think will come, I say, well the whole world of course. Who would not want to be there for the best guy that was ever born? There is a hurricane and a tropical storm on the way to Hawaii. As in some tradition rain at a funeral is a sign of love and good luck, well I think the heavens are opening up a big show for Dado.
I miss him to the moon and back. He loved Tweety bird, and I will think of him every time I see any yellow bird. He was so good. I hope he can see me from his place and know how much I loved him. I am strong, and I am so weak. I hope that his service will release in me the stuck in my chest feeling.
Coco, safe journey for Dado's services. In many cultures rain is a good sign, so apparently the heaven's plan on welcoming Dado with a spectacular home coming. When it rains at funeral services I chose to see it as god's homage to our sorrow. (((HUGS)))
Coco, I love your comment "I am strong, and I am so weak." I know exactly what you mean. In my religion we have burials very quickly after death--I think that it's a good thing because it removes much of the anxiety in anticipation of the funeral. I think you will do better after the service.
Safe journey, Coco..will be thinking of you..I know how you feel..And I was kind of amused at the lady who spoke of her diabetes...just the other day, someone asked me if I was stepping out yet! Uh..nope.
Been thinking of you when I saw that the rare - they said - hurricane was going to come to Hawaii. Grief is a difficult road to travel no getting around that fact. My thoughts and prayers for you.