What we caregivers worry about happened. I fell on Sun. and broke my ankle. Spent all the next day with DD and DH in tow at two different clinics to learnI have to have surgery next Tue. By the end of the day and all of the next, DH was totally out of it.( Routine not there) He is a little better today but not good, Can't remember why I can't walk. I couldn't "master" the crutches so fortunately the have these little three wheeled carts that you put your knee on and roll around. Works really well if you have a big enough house. Kind of a struggle for awhile but I'm getting better. To make a long story short,I will be laid up for 6 to 8 weeks at least. Thank goodness for my wonderful family but it's going to be a really long road. DH is just not able to do that much anymore to help but he is trying.
I am so sorry. You sound very upbeat and positive. That is a fear of mine. If I get sick or hurt. I don't know what I would. I will be praying for speedy healing for you.
I am sorry to hear of your fall. You have a wonderful family, but are they going to be enough to see you through this long road? Its a big ask, and I am concerned that you may try to do more than you should. I know from experience (2 surgeries and several medical procedures and treatments) that family can be helpful but with the 24/7 burden of care we have for our LO's we sometimes need to get additional help.
No family here tonight and it is suddenly so apparent that I have been doing everything for DH. He said he would just have a bowl of cereal. He went in the kitchen and just stood there not knowing what to do. When I get upset it makes things worse and I know this.It's just so hard. He always does dishes and has always done a good job but I have to set up the dishwater ashe does not remember to put dish soap in and coaching does not help because he is so afraid of making mistakes it's likehis mind goes completely blank. not sure how I'm going to get through this. I know I'm just rambling but it's just good to let my thoughts out. This website has been my only support group. I read every day. It's so hard to think the 6 to 8 weeks and I know I just need to take one day at a time.Thank you for the thoughts hugs and prayers.
mkayeb I am so sorry you got hurt! Reading your post reminds me of how painful it was when my darling was home in the earlier phases. I remember oh so well, getting impatient with him and thinking well come on THINK! Poor dear. Now, as he sits as a zombie and has no words left, cannot walk and barely function, I reflect on those times not long ago and how unreal it all seemed.
Depending on what you and your husband need done, you might want to get some kind of home help in--whether it be a "real" trained nurse's aide, or more of a homemaker kind of person. It could just be temporary, for the weeks you need it. You are probably going to need to stay off that ankle to some extent--keep your feet up more than usual--you might get into issues of pain and swelling or throbbing if you are on your feet too much. (I don't know--just brainstorming and guessing.) It may be that you could do the necessary tasks if the home help didn't show up--but that you should not be doing it every day for 6-8 weeks.
We live in a very small town (3 thousand people, the nearest hospital 78 miles) "in home help" is very limited. Thank goodness school is out so Grandkids can help but they will go back by early Aug. I guess I'm just so frustrated and the realiazation that I can't ask the one who has always been my helper and "rock" to do things that he was always able. It's just not there anymore. At least at this point there is not very much pain--not sure how it will be after the surgery.As I said in my first post I'm getting around with my "3wheeler". It's just so good to have all of you helping me through this.
I ditto Elizabeth's advice. Another possible source is your church. I asked the church secretary to put a small notice in the bulletin, asking for 2 hours (paid) help a day. I got a most capable, kind woman who made Eric laugh and who also made marvelous lunches. Ankles need the best of care, and you deserve it.
Surgery went well--seven screws and a plate. lasted about an hour. DD took me to the hospital 78 miles from home. DH sister and husband stayed with him. When I checked in with SIL she said they were shopping and DH said he needed to go to the bathroom. Well brotherinlaw didn't realize how bad DH and didn't watch him and he got lost. another SIL happened to see him wandering around the store and asked him where I was. He said he couldn't find "that woman" (not sure if he was referring to me or his sister). Anyway SIL no. 2 brought him home and finally after phone calls to sheriff's dept and other contacts around town everyone was back together and ok All in all it turned out well as our "little town" is very aware of our situation. Family has been super and I'm getting along really well. Now to get checkup on Wed 23 to see how long it will be before I can walk. And there's my update!
That is wild! I'm glad that your family is doing their best (ha-ha…not funny, but still, kind of comical, since it all turned out all right) to help with things. Do you have a cast? Are you on crutches? Or a walker? Is the ankle bothering you much? Keep us updated.
I have a cast (very bulky) but I will get it off on Wed. Then in a boot but no weight allowed. I tried crutches when I first did this but that was a real "wreck" They have a three wheeled cart that you put your knee on It has handle bars and is very maneuverable. It will be even better when I get back in the boot. Pain is very mild now. DH is really having a hard time Too much out of routine. He's not remembering things that were so easy for him before. So far so good! Thanks Elizabeth. I will keep posting.
re-reading my posts---I kept repeating myself on what was happening guess I could blame it on the pain meds. So far this AM things are going pretty well. Hoping attitude does stay positive. Just don't want to think too far ahead as to how long this will take and then possible re-hab also.
Just got the cast off--what a relief. Back in the boot which is so much more comfortable. Dr. says 6 to8 weeks but maybe sooner.(We can always hope) DH is adjusting a little better but still not like he was before the accident. Hoping when I'm completely healed he'll bounce back. I know the weeks will seem like forever but I'll make. Thanks for everyones concerns.
mkayeb, this is just a thought out of left field, but I'm wondering if you should get one of those "voice of help" buttons to wear around your neck, just temporarily while your mobility is impaired. If you or DH had an emergency of some kind…I don't know what…but it might get you help faster…like if you couldn't get to the phone quickly or something.
Well here we go again---I am so careful ( I thought) with my cell phone. Sure enough into the toilet it went; grabbed it out quickly and of course you've go t to rinse it off---more water which cell phones hate. Anyway to make a long story short my DH phone is just like mine so I just switched the SIM cards and so far so good. Mine of course is resting in a bowl of rice hopefully drying out. I'll just have to keep an extra close eye on DH since he now has no phone. Surely my luck will get better!
Well as of yesterday I'm finally off of my "three wheeler" and walking with a walker. Ankle is completely healed. It never was very painful but the positions you put your body in to try to do everything on the three wheeler took its toll on my back. So after sciatica an MRI diagnosis of spinal stenosis and two cortisone shots I think I'm finally starting to get better. Still quite a lot of soreness in muscles that haven't been active in two months. DH is doing pretty well. Still not back to how he was before my accident. Hope he keeps improving. Boy, you don't realize how much you depend your limbs until you are not able to use them!
I know - I lost it too. I had so many plans like exercising, buying a bike, enjoying the summer but surgery squashed those plans. Now that I can swim, do whatever physical stuff I want, the summer is almost over. We might have one more month of the pool before they close it for the winter - all depends on the weather.