My DH(he's in a wheelchair) constantly jiggles . He will latch on to anything he can,tablecloth,clothing protector, my arms and hands. He is incredibly strong, will not let go.It sometimes takes two aides to pry him loose. I have had many reconstructive surgeries on my hands and Dr. said this is damaging them. I don't know what to do, he wants to hug me when he sees me or hold my hand.Has anyone here had this problem?I do not want him on drugs to control this. Otherwise they have no problems with him. He is very cooperative about shpwering,taking his medications, etc..
find something to put in his hands while you visit. I bought those little rattle toys babies use to keep his hand occupied. or you can use clean rolled up washcloths. something to hold will help. but the strength they have is just incredible even in weak stages.
my husband does the same thing...he will want to shake your hand and then continue to squeeze it as hard as he can. It's like a vice grip. And he won't let go.
Divvi,I have tried giving him everything imaginable.Stuffed toys with arms and legs, real small stuffed toys,towels, washcloths even another t-shirt to twist '.He also will get ahold of his own fingers and pull and twist them and holler it hurts.I am willing to try anything.
My DH also has this powerful grip. I have often wondered if holding on so tightly gives him a sense of security or does he just not realize how strong he is. I'm sure that is over analyzing. If we are walking I take him by the wrist and hold on and if we are sitting I lay his hand on his leg an place my hand on top of his. It is working okay so far. I just know I cannot let him squeeze my hand because it just hurts too much.
I think that's right,Charlotte,when I tellhim to let go,he grasps even harder.For the past year he has been taking everything I say oppositely.When someone speaks he'll turn the opposite way to see them,food is too hot,even when it's cold.He blows on it before he'll open his mouth. Really strange.
yhouniey, I know you have tried many things at this point, yes it could be they just are so ansy they want to hold on to human contact. one last suggestion try one of those buzzing disposable battery toothbrushes.? I know mary *red*, and I have used them over the years with much success to keeping the hands occupied. the buzzing sound and movement tends to sooth them. mine still likes it years later and tends to put it to his face and it sooths him to sleep. don't ask why, we have to just go with the flow that helps with any and all strangeness this disease brings. I hope you find something. all else fails, I know if mine is too ansy, a small dose of Ativan works to ease him back into a mellow mood. its more my belief they can become fearful and its a stress hold that wont allow them to release the grip. we can never know whats going on with the brain. only guessing.
Gee's, I thought I was being too hard on my husband when he touches me and I scream out and become frighten of his also amazing POWERFUL grasp! It feels like an Octopus attacked me and so out of character for him. He is 5'11", 220 pds to my 5'4", 112 pds.
I truly believed it was me. So relieved to hear that other's have experienced this strange behavior from their LO. Even our beloved dog dose not let him pick him up. Our dog runs away and hides in my walk in closet. I do know that he, my husband, becomes frightened at my response and has absolutely no idea that he has hurt me in anyway.
I also noticed that he slams things that he is holding. Doesn't matter what it is, books, hair brushes, jars, plates.....Whatever. He slams doors, cabinets, car doors, trunks. Everything is "BANG, BANG, BANG," all day long. Sometimes I resort to ear-plugs just to block out the constant BANGING. Of course I tried to "reason" with him and of course he looked at me like I had three heads and went right back to BANGING around the house. Thank GOD for Target!
He is on 50 mg of Seraquel and at first it totally mellowed him out. It was HEAVEN for me.Obviously he needs a dosage adjustment.
Thanks guys and gals for the in sight. I feel relieved to know that it is the "disease" and not my husband.
At meals, I do place my hand over his on the table,he will allow this for a short time. I remove the tablecloth,s & p shakers and anything he can reach(don't know why they even use tablecloths).One of his aides told me he has a system when he bathes him or is getting him ready for bed,I told him to please clue the other aides in on his method of handling it.This week, Sonny has not gotten a hold of my hand,and the swelling is going down, I am trying to be more alert,also calling for help right away instead of trying to get him to release me.The staff offers him their hand in exchange for mine,really thankful for them.
Back to grabbing your hand and squeezing as hard as he can. Does he also grimace with his teeth clenched? My DH is confined to bed and cannot roll over or change his position. When we are rolling him to change diapers he will grab a hand and squeeze really hard and grimace with his teeth clenched. He seems to have a hard time letting go.