It has been a rough year for all of us, so I have tried to infuse a little humor into our lives with my first blog of the new year. I invite you to log onto the home page - www.thealzheimerspouse.com - and read today's blog. Although every word is true, and the basis of it is sad, I hope no one is offended by my attempt to look at it with humor.
Congratulations on losing the weight....at our age that's quite a feat....total bummer the way it happened.
I'm the opposite, gaining weight while he was at home and now the stress weight is slowly coming off.
I can't believe the fight you had to go through to get him placed...up here they (doctor and community care nurses) basically took him from acute care and put him into LTC and told me that I had done enough. Mind you there is a very short waiting list in the town I live in, in other areas of the country there are long wait lists and different rules for each province.
good to hear a positive in the midst of the negative of this disease. I am sure you feel much better. I know I put on 50 pounds since his diagnosis. I am trying to change things but unless I can get the doctor to listen about getting my thyroid readings straight, it will be harder. After first meeting with doctor I am of the belief I will need to go to the one and only naturopath in the area to get it straightened out. Medical doctors only check TSH and sometimes T4. T3 also needs to be checked. But, since I am trying to get my cholesterol readings back down which means taking the supplements and exercise hopefully that will translate into some weight loss. I also have PCOS which has a symptom of obesity - add that and genetics I feel doomed.
Joan, your weight story could be my story! Well, except for the 50 pound weight loss - congratulations on that, but a rough way to do it. Like you, I think I have battled weight since childhood, but probably from about age 10. Before that,I was so thin that my mother took me to the doctor! After an illness when I about 9, the doctor decided that I needed "building up" - well, thank you doctor!!! There have been only a couple of instances in my adult life when I've heard "my, you're just a little peanut" or "what a cute little butt" - been a looong time since I heard that! Maybe something good will come out of this stinkin' disease for me, that is if I live through it! I do notice that my appetite has changed a little, because of knots & butterflies in my tummy I presume. Always there, just not so noticeably much of the time (unless I've just gotten used to it!) Thank you for the chuckles- laughter is the best medicine - but it sure isn't easy! Fortunately, I seem to have been blessed with a pretty good sense of humor - hopefully, it will help to see me through.
Joan, I am sure the fifty pound loss is in your "plus column", but I agree not the way it was brought about. Hopefully, your appetite will return somewhat in the months ahead. I think the extreme stress of dealing with Medicaid over those months would have ruined anyone's appetite. Thankfully, it worked out for you in the end. I am sure 2014 will be a better year than 2013. Thanks for all you continue to do for us all.
Joan, we have to keep our sense of humor to survive this! So sorry for the way it had to happen, but so happy you have lost the weight.
From the other end.....I've always weighed around 100-105 - all my life. During the last 3 months before DH died, I started losing weight and I know it was because I was having to feed him and by the time I did that, I wasn't hungry, nor did I want what I had fixed for him. The last 13 days, I was at the nursing home so much, I never had time to eat. I was down to 89 lbs. when he died. Within two weeks I felt as if I was starving but just could not cook and eat it. Breakfast I could manage. Then I started to go out to eat lunch - not fast food - just a casual sit down place where I could get a good nourishing and balanced meal. In the evening I would fix something light that I could get down. Now, 5 weeks later, I'm back up to my 100 lbs! I get hungry now and when I do - no matter the time, I leave he house and go out to eat somewhere. I don't mind eating by myself, I love to people watch and usually strike up a conversation with someone near me. I've been able to spread the news about ALZ on these visits. Maybe, just maybe, the stress of the last 11 years is slowly dissipating from my body. It feels good.
My tale is much like Vickie's Other than the fact that I had put on 20+ lbs, which I never lost, when I quit smoking back in the 90's' The loss began with the feeding DW for the exact same reasons Vickie mentioned. It took me too long to conclude I was accomplishing little by getting that last sip of Ensure past her lips. What was I don't ?? Prolonging a life with no quality for another half a day. For whose benefit, not hers that for sure. Then came the need for around the clock nursing, eating with strangers in your home doesn't produce an appetite stimulating environment . Going out with them in charge just produced anxiety. That was followed by four intermittent one week duration hospital hospice admissions. This entailed multi trips to the hospital a day; the "minder" volunteers provided by Hospice varied a great deal in skill and commitment. Finding DW scrunched up behind the hospital bed with her tray of untouched food on the floor was disheartening to say the least. Comments like she's not hungry or I can't get her into bed resulted in no appetite, just stress, bile and anger for dinner too many nights. Days spent at the skill nursing facility, where she subsequently passed were not exactly appetite stimulants. Meals left my caring neighbors went uneaten. I can recall the moment when I started to leave my apartment and realized I was holding on to my shorts, they were going to fall off my belt was at the last loop. By the time DW passed I had lost more than 30lbs. I was going to the rear of the closet pulling out clothing that hadn't fit since 2000. Once the immediate wave of depression resulting from DWs passing had dissipated somewhat and eating became a consideration I realized I felt better not caring the excess weight. I was taken off high blood pressure meds, in fact my blood pressure was too low! I placed myself on a sensible diet and I am now within 5lbs of what I weighed when I graduated high school. I don't mind eating alone, it's cooking for one that's the real challenge. The other night going out to dinner with a female friend was typical we shared a salad appetizer and shared a main course. One of the only positive outcomes of Alzheimer's is the diet it induces to caregivers
I am having the opposite problem. I am eating to much, have been for the past few months. I can' seem to stop. I don't care what it is I am eating either. I know that it is depression and the loss of DH. I hope that when the weather warms up and I can get out more, that will help.
Yes, and my DH is still at home. I have it much easier than many of you here. My DD lives with us so I have someone to vent to. (So does she when her job is getting her down) Since he went on hospice in September I have help at least 5 mornings a week and sometimes 7. I still eat anything I see. Twelve years ago I lost 40 lbs and swore I would never get that way again. Well, guess what, I am right back up to my previous high.
As I said in the blog, I have always been a stress eater. If I had followed my normal pattern in regards to eating, I would have gained 100 lbs by now, not lost 55. But the stress was so monumental that things just went in the opposite direction. I don't know why, and believe me, I don't care. The only good thing that has come out of this Alzheimer nightmare is that my appetite is gone, and I hope it never returns.
Moon,
I'm plodding along, hoping to write a new blog in a day or two.
I also have gained 25 lbs in the past year and a half. I just stopped taking care of me or even caring.
Depression and anxiety lead me to just eat without thinking or planning. Look at treadmill in the house and don't have energy or motivation. I keep trying to get back to taking care of my diet and exercise but the stress wears me down.