As I read these posts and especially Joan's blog "Overdosing on freedom", I'm thinking about what all this really means to me. I was once free to choose between the adversities of care giving and freedom, and without hesitation, I choose care giving, with all the problems and adversity associated with it.
I have to admit that because of my age, and having already enjoyed all the happiness that life has to offer, the choice of caregiver over freedom was much easier for me than it would be for most of you on this site
Looking back on it, there never was a time when I doubted my choice of adversity over freedom and I'll tell you why........As I've said before, The greatest gift life has to offer me is happiness. That's what I live for. What else is there? .......What makes me happy? Only one thing. A good opinion of myself..,... And what gives me a good opinion of myself? Only one thing.. Making others happy…… ….Now what would my self-esteem be like if I had chosen freedom over care giving? What I actually chose was happiness over despair.
And now that I'm on my soapbox, I need to mention a few more things that I've learned. The happiest people that I've known, have suffered some tragedy or been afflicted throughout their lives by serious adversity, either born with a physical defect themselves or like us, caring for a family member who is afflicted. So it all boils down to a simple formula.....
Adversity brings self-esteem....... which equals happiness.
Over and over again I think of these quotes.
....Adversity builds strength.
....If life were a bowl of cherries it would not be worth living.
....Without bad times there would be no good times.

What message do you get from this little poem?

Whenever Richard Cory went downtown,
We people on the pavement looked at him.
He was a gentleman from sole to crown.
Clean favored and imperially slim.
And he was always quietly arrayed.
And he was always human when he talked,
But still he fluttered pulses when he said,
"Good morning," and he glittered when he walked.
And he was rich -- yes richer than a king,
And admirably schooled in every grace.
In fine, we thought that he was everything
To make us wish that we were in his place.
So on we worked and waited for the light.
And went without the meat, and cursed the bread.
And Richard Cory, one calm summer night,
Went home and put a bullet through his head.
...........By Edwin Arlington Robinson (1869-1935)

With love and happiness to all.............GeorgieBoy

That has always been a poem that made an impression on me since high school. Soo true. We never know what others are going through. Thanks for sharing your wisdom.