It sure has taken a long time, but I got to be ninety-two years old today. I'm wondering if I'm the oldest, old man here........... Maybe, ol don ?
When I first came to this site, because of my age, I felt like a stranger. But all of you changed my mind about that. You convinced me that in spite of my age, I was one of you and somehow, I really like being one of you. Even though I feel that I don't have much to contribute because my dementia trip was an easy one when compared to others on this site.
Helen was diagnosed in April 2008 with vascular dementia and left me in Sept. 2012. A rather short trip of four and a half years. And it was only the last two years that were really bad. I usually feel that others are more qualified to offer suggestions, but right now I feel like I do have something to say to those of you, like me, who's loved ones have passed, and are having a hard time getting over the loss.
Even with lots of family and friends, I felt loneliness for the first time in my life. It was a terrible feeling, but it only lasted for a month because I stumbled on the solution. I followed the suggestions on this site and found that if I kept myself busy, doing something that I liked to do, I was never lonely. And I knew from my experience with this site, that I liked writing stories about my Dear Helen. With 67 years of marriage, I had a lot of stories to tell, and I let them all out. Writing the stories was like reliving them. I not only enjoyed writing them, but I enjoyed reading them. I shared the dementia stories on this site but I wrote many other stories and found a way to share them all with family and friends. Writing stories was my magic therapy to cure loneliness.
I had noticed from looking at profiles here that some of you old timers have a blog spot or website of your own where you share stories and photos of your loved ones and I've enjoyed reading them so much. And that gave me the idea that maybe I should have a site of my own. So that's what happened. And since I started that website, there's no way I could ever be lonely again.
At first it was just two pages of stories about Dear Helen. Before and after dementia, like a tribute to her memory. But as time went on I added some pages of other things I was interested in, such as some of my favorite photos and some music that I wrote and some thoughts I chose to think.
Overall, I have to say that building a website is great therapy. It's not expensive ($100 to $180 per year). It's fun to do. The site provider guided me through the complete process. I used HOSTBABY because it seemed better suited for music. Anyone like me, who's loved one has left you and you find yourself with time on your hands, Please look into this. Your family and friends will love it. If I can be of help to any of you, you can contact me through email or my website. Both addresses are in my profile.
One more thing...........I wish more of you would put some information about yourselves into your profile so I can get to know you better.
CHARLOTTE. By looking at your profile I figured out that you were married at the age of 18, and Art was 23. Same as Helen and me, but at our present ages, I'm almost old enough to be your grandpa. As a birthday partner, I want to wish you a very happy birthday, with lots of family and friends around you. Art will be happy also. GeorgieBoy
Happy Birthday Georgieboy from another older (old) member of this site. You give good advise and I agree that staying busy is important. You and I don't have a lot of years left in this old world and I am going to spend them living and remember all the good things that have happened in my life.
Happy birthday, George. I finally tried journaling and am really liking it. I tend to be a private person and the book is just for me. Some things I really don't want to share-even with my family. I hope, like you, I have gained some wisdom along with the years. I think I still have a lot to give and I am enjoying my life.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY GEORGIEBOY!!! Or as we say here, Hauoli la hanau, happy was the day of your birth. You truly rock. And, I want to thank you, mahalo, from the bottom of my heart, for what you did for all of us, your generous contribution you know what I am talking about. What a wonderful surprise.
Happy Birthday, glad you are doing well. Keep writing, it will be a huge testimate for all those younger folks coming up who do not know what true love and a true committment are.
Happiest Birthday Georgieboy! its not the years that count but the wisdom that comes with time. and you have a very natural ability to make us all smile. your Helen is smiling today just for you. hugs. divvi
Happy birthday, Georgieboy. You have me by a few years - I'm 82, been married for 59+ years. My wife is in an Alzheimer care facility now, so I am alone for the first time in my life. Recently I have felt that I had no ambition to do anything. Maybe I should try your idea of writing down stories of our life together. I'll see if my kids can help with that. Right now I'm at my daughter's and we plan to go to a friends 80th birthday party tomorrow.
Happy Birthday to you Georgie. You have provided us with so much wisdom, kindness, and life experience. I look forward to your posts, and will now check out your website. Hope you had a wonderful birthday celebration.
Happy Birthday GeorgieBoy. I so admire you, how you took care of your dear wife, and your commitment to continue to live a full life. You have helped me see a path for my future. I feel comfortable that I have a purpose today, as my husband is alive and living in a Memory Care facility. But I always wonder what I will do once he is gone and I'm alone. It is so difficult to keep a good and positive attitude when so many friends are now getting sick and dying of gruesome diseases. You are a role model and I want to be like you when I grow up!
Happy Birthday Georgieboy I too write the stories, I have written the stories of my dad, and my childrens dad, I want them to know their dad, they were young teens when he passed. It does help. I need to start writing about this dh, he will be 83 come Dec. only has gray hair in his sideburns, and still has plenty of hair. He too has done a lot with his life. They can live on through these stories of who they once were. Bonnie
Georgieboy, Happy Birthday. And very glad you still post. Your trip may have been short, that just goes to show that no two paths are the same on this journey. And it helps to know that some do have it a little easier. Gives hope to the new members. Wishing you the very best this weekend :))))
Happy Birthday my friend,how ever you apparently still hold the "oldest" member catagory altho there have been days when I felt much older,,I turned 76 in May and am currently looking for a....... damn I forgot what I was looking for,anyway make it a great day
I feel like I need to thank all of you for the Happy-Birthday wishes. I really did have a happy, happy-birthday although I was not looking forward to it or expecting it to be so happy.
My big sister told all of her family that she did not want any party for her 93rd birthday because it was too much for her to handle. She is living alone in a big house just like I am. I felt the same as she. I didn't want them all pilling in on me.
But my son had notified me two months ago that He was coming from Singapore for my birthday and was notifying all the family and friends, And since he was making such a big deal about it, and some friends coming from far away, I didn't want to disappoint him with anything negative, But I still was quite apprehensive and fearful of it.
As it turned out, I found out that I still had something to learn, even at 92yo. What makes a Happy-Birthday happy is not the cards and gifts and cake and dinning and seeing family and old friends. What made it so happy for me, was seeing my old friends and loved ones happy. Everybody was having such a great time and happiness was everywhere, and I just could not keep myself from being happy along with them.
Actually, it kind of confirms my long time thinking about happiness which I have thought and written so much about......
Wishing HAPPINESS for everyone here...You all deserve a lot of it...GeorgieBoy
George, just looked at your profile picture - what a wonderful,happy couple! You may be getting older chronologically, but you are very young at heart. If I live that long, I hope I have that same attitude & positive outlook.
George - did not get on here yesterday so happy belated birthday. Art never remembered my birthday or our anniversary until the last 3 or 4 years when I don't want him to - go figure. Yes, I was 18 when I married. I figured I had been out of high school for a year, so no reason to wait.
I was also on the rebound as was he. I also wanted to get away from abusive family males. We were married 11 days after we met - not recommended. I also had vowed (watch those vows) that the next guy who forced himself on me would either marry me or I would kill myself. Not a way to start a marriage by any means. But I tried to make it the best I could and here we are.
I would not say you are old enough to be my grandpa. If my mom were alive she would have been 91 on the 17th. My dad was 51 when I was born, too. Never had a grandfather as one died in 1906 and the other around 1945. But we did have a couple elderly men in our neighborhood that we adopted as grandparents. Art's grandfather had a stroke the day we announced we were getting married and spent the last years of his life in a nursing home mostly just vegetating.
It is good to hear of long happy marriages and glad your marriage is included in that group.
Georgie, I am so glad that you had such a happy day. And I think you are very wise, it is the people that make the day happy, not the trappings that go with it!
After checking out your website I urge everyone here to go there also,what a great family an great website to display all your precious memories,after all when its all said and done thats all we have
George--your great attitude reminds me of a man I know who is 94 years old. He is the only male in one of my Zumba classes and flirts with all the (much younger) gals. The reason you remind me of him is that he has also been through adversity--he is a Holocaust survivor--but he prevailed and has lived a long, happy life since then. I wish the same for you--Happy Birthday.
George, sorry I am so late in wishing you a happy, happy birthday. I marvel at the way you handle life. I can't wait to read your stories. Keep up the good work, it gives me hope for better days ahead. Kathy