Sunday dh was in pain at church, we left. Before we left church he whispered, if you let me have keys, I would be ok. He was angry. He would not go to hospital, we went home. Couple hours later, he was ready to go. He was mister happy at the hospital, you wouldn't know anything was wrong, then the pain got worse, finally they gave him morphine. After a couple of hours he blew. He wanted pants and food. Said he hadn't had food since 4 p.m. The day before. It was true. The problem was he had a cathiture in. He fought the nurse and I. She called for help. Now he was against the wall with, 5 or 6 nurses and aids, 1 cop, and 1 Dr. Looking on. He managed to grab is pants and was putting them on, the nurse was holding his cathiture, she was raising it as he pulled his pants up. I told the cop he was a retired trooper. He stepped forward, engaged him in cop talk, and talked him into sitting in wheelchair, one nurse showed him a sandwich he could eat in his room. The Dr. Pushed the wheelchair down the hall, onto the elevator and into his room where he got his sandwich and a brownie. He talked nonstop, even while eating. He had 2 kidney stones, one blocking the kidney into the urethe( can't spell it). They put in a stint, and took the smaller one out. In a couple weeks the other will be crushed. After his surgery he was able to eat. Would not eat laying down, he sat up, swung his feet down on the floor. Compression tubes took blankets off the bed, he was all tangled in all the tubes. The nurse gave up on him laying back down, said DON'T. Stand up. After eating he got up, I tried to stop him, he was going to the bathroom. Nurse had to come back talk him into using port a potty. They brought sheets to change bed. It was 7:30, I said time to go. They kept him laying on his back, Monday, and Tuesday. Wednesday he was moved down the hall, they had him sitting up. He refused food Tuesday supper, and all day Wednesday. Tuesday afternoon he was crying because he was tied down, dying, losing his wife, and would never see his kids and brother again. I finally. Got him talking about something else. We went home Wednesday night at 8:00 p.m. He got in the car and he stunk. Today when I was unpacking his bags, I noticed his soap, toothbrush, toothpaste, D.O. We're unopened. I assumed he had been bathed before I got there each day. I am upset, but I will be aware and it won't happened again. Plus he was mad at me the whole time. Even after he got home until this after noon. I did get him to eat soup last night, then supper tonight. He is afraid it will stuff his kidney if he eats. It's been terribly ruff on him, and me. I can tell he lost ground over it, I just hope he can recover from it. Hope this isn't too much of a rant, but he would have washed himself, brushed his own teeth, but he couldn't reach anything, and didn't know to ask. I never dreamed they weren't keeping him clean. Love, Bonnie
Sorry Bonnie that they ignored his personal care needs - that is inexcusable. But then again maybe he fought them on it and it was a fight they did not want to do.
Sorry about the whole nightmare. I am glad they found the problem and took care of the one. Hope the other one is not causing him pain. And hope he is able to gain back ground.
oh dear what a dreadful experience for you both. I would ask about the lack of personal hygiene. he may have been belligerent but that is when they get him Ativan or such to calm him down enough to meet his care needs. esp in a hospital. unacceptable. the dr should be questioned and asked why nothing to calm him wasn't administered so the nurses could do their jobs. I hope his recovery and yours are soon. divvi
Bonnie, I agree with Charlotte and divvi, there's no excuse that they didn't give him something to calm him so they could take care of his hygiene needs. I do know many hospitals (particularly psych hospitals) will not force them to do something they don't want to do. When I called the Medical Director demanding to know why my husband have not showered, shaved or brushed his teeth in 7 days I was told "We don't force them to do something they don't want to do" and this at a psych hospital.
I recommend that you contact the patient advocate at the hospital with your complaints. My experience is that they're very responsive and want to correct any issues. BTW, if he needs to go back again for the other stone, I would also mention that to the patient advocate and tell them what you expect will happen during his next stay (bathing, psych consult for agitation and meds, etc).
Bonnie, what a horrible experience for both of you! I agree with the others about the personal care/hygiene issues. I also know from my dH's experience with kidney stones that the pain and back up of toxins in the system can turn even the most mild mannered of persons into an absolute monster.
This lack of patient hygiene is all too common here in Vancouver, Canada. LFL's advice about the patient advocate is good, that is, if the hospital has one. We didn't have one here when I noticed the same lack of personal care when my mother was in the hospital (1990) and, a few years later in 2007, when my husband was a patient. My best friend, a retired nurse, was hospitalized for a week in 2011 - same story. With health care costs soaring here, there are fewer staff - at least that is the reason given.
mary75*, in the US. hospitals are required to have a patient advocate, usually a registered nurse who has worked in the facility but is now in administration. I don't know how long it's been a requirement but all hospitals now seem to have one (even in 2008 here they did). They can be very effective in helping to solve problems, but let's not kid ourselves, the reason they exist is to resolve issues at the local level so complaints are not made to the state/national regulators which ruins their ratings and can affect funding levels.
If there's no patient advocate, call the hospital Medical Director or CEO...trust me, they'll get you in touch with someone to resolve the problems. Then they'll send you a survey asking you to rate their responses in solving your issues. It's all about funding and ratings...use it to your advantage.
We had a problem with a hospital RN not giving Claude his doctor order meds. She was too "busy". Cathie went and talked to the charge nurse. He got his meds but both the charge nurse and the RN were very surly about it. We requested another nurse be assigned to him. Cathie was ticked off about their attitudes so she went directly to the Director of Nurses. The DON talked to them, the complaint was put in their personnel files and Cathie got a long distance call the next day with an apology.
Good advice from everyone. This is a nation wide chain, I believe. Don't know if I am aloud to mention name. After the ER experience he was Mr. Happy Camper to them. But, was Mr. ANGRY to me. He didn't even complain about staying in bed. He thought he was tied to the bed, plus having the compressions on his legs. I don't know where he got the idea he was tied to the bed. I would tell him he wasn't, just the leg compressor was keeping him down. I couldn't have laid on my back that long. The next stay will be different. I will check out patient advocate, but will also talk to his Dr. Monday. He could wash himself and do everything if it was offered. I don't think it was offered or his mug would have been out and in use instead of a paper cup. He would not know to ask. He has been in that hospital before and didn't come home smelling. He is now eating and bathing, just has pain when he goes to pee. Thank you everyone for the advice and backup. I will update. Love Bonnie
If the nationwide chain is Rivera, I've posted before of problems I had with them. Ol' Don, too, has posted, and named, a care facility chain that did not deliver well. By the time I had transferred my husband out of Rivera's facility, three other families were in the process of transferring their loved ones out. Private Health Care is now big business, and I have asked my kids - if it comes to a placement for me - to chose a government-run care facility, rather than a private one whose chief motive, in my opinion, is profit. I was told by the Director of Nurses at Rivera that in intermediate care, where my husband was, that he could have 15 mins. of nursing care per 24 hour period. Then he would do without, or I could hire a nurse. For the last 3 months of his life (in another private care facility, better but with its own problems), I paid $21,000.00 per month. This included the cost of his room and round-the -clock care aides. In addition, I was there at least 2 hours a day. Even so, the call light was ignored when I needed the RN to administer Ventilin (a broncho-dilator, anti-spasmodic) to help him breathe. I talked to the CEO who promised it would never happen again. It did. I went again to the CEO. My husband died three days later. I have usually found that there is one individual in an organization that cares, and the key is to find that person. However, sometimes that person is let go by management and replaced by a cheaper, less pensioned, less experienced individual who starts at the lower end of the pay schedule. Being a nurse, I still believe that most nurses who are hired by government care facilities are there to deliver good health care and are accountable to the health system. While there are concerns about the huge health care costs, the profit motive does not enter the picture.
Bonnie so sad to hear of this and I hope things get immensely better. mary75* what an awful expensive challenge you had been given, and your sweetie too.
It was Mercy hospital, he was there for kidney stones he couldn't pass. Has to go again in a week or two to have a very large one crushed. Had to take him off blood thinners for two weeks to do it. He's happy to be home. Bonnie