Today while I was out running some errands, I ran into a friend who just lost his wife two weeks ago to ALZ. She had problems with her balance, was getting up from her chair, fell and broke her hip and suffered a collapsed lung. Following 5 days in the hospital, she suffered respiratory failure. While she was in the hospital, the deputy Sheriff called, asked him if he was RB and he said he was. Then he was asked if his wife was in the A Hospital and he said she was and finally he was asked if her name was JB and he said it was. Then he was told that he had been accused of throwing her down causing the broken hip and lung collapse...He was shocked and said no that is not true, he was on the phone with the chaplain from hospice when she fell..the Sheriff said that was his ace in the hole. When asked who the accuser is the Sheriff said he could not share that but his lawyer could...but in the his lawyer said " let's just drop it"... Because of some other very bad behaviour by his wife's 2 daughters, he is suspicious of them..and he has reason to be as they violated his and his wife's home and things I can't really go into. I have always been somewhat concerned about any family member turning on a spousal caregiver and laying such a claim against me or any of us in this situation. I mean here we manage meds, are resonsible for health care decisions etc...and then something like this.
I had to make a decision this week for DH to have some dental work done..implant rather than a bridge..he broke a front tooth...but such a procedure is not without risk though I think he will be fine..they go over all the possible risks and death is one of them. It almsot makes me want to scream
It might be a good idea to kick around some ideas of how someone could level such a charge as was leveled against our friend so we can endeavour to guard against it as best we can..
First of all his own lawyer is duty bound to tell him who it was by the nature of that person being his lawyer. If it is his lawyer then he is in the service of that man and serves no other's interests. My lawyer does not decide what family issues I am privy to or not. My lawyer serves my interests only or he is fired.
Secondly by nature some people are like this. I have stories like this, Carol does, and many others have written about such experiences where the children, or relatives, or some party is acting in their own interests without concern for others. They may want money, or want to spite someone, or may just be mean or ignorant. Some people develop deep resentments because someone else has something. Facts in none of this mean anything. It's all behavioural.
It's likely in your story that one of the daughter's made a comment to the police who took the trouble to mention it to him as warning that such a comment was made since it's also clear that no charges were made since in this story the apparent result was his lawyer suggested to 'just drop it'. Therefore no legal charge was laid.
Since you would need to hire your dentist to assist you in your dastardly deed here, it's terrribly unlikely that anyone would see dental work as an attempt to do away with someone.
Where all this is serious is that when we are so much under duress even just getting dental work done for them, when we hear such horror stories about the deep resentments within some relatives or simply their own bad natures it really is the last thing we need to hear.
In one such case, the entire family didn't want to know about their brother's obvious problems and so blamed the wife entirely for his condition. In another the son is in the basement plotting to get all the money. In another the daughter takes her anger at losing her father out on the man willing to fill his shoes. In another someone kills someone to take five dollars off them.
Most people are good enough and want to do the right thing. And some will step forward and do something for you just to help out. It's the luck of the draw who we have around us and to some degree it's up to us to try and understand what is going on by really observing.
My poor mother was a great lady and she reacted to bad stories. Somehow bad stories were more important than good stories and needed to be taken much more seriously. But most stories have holes in them and bad things in life are NOT more important then good ones. They are the ones we fear and good natured people need real advocates around them to help seperate the wheat from the chaff where most things unfortunately have some chaff in them.
It is very unlikely the trouble you are taking trying to get his dental work done for him will be seen in a bad light. It pains me that good people like you are troubled by such things.