We are in our 5th month of Hospice. DH still declines each day. I still don't know how he is still going. He is unable to do so many things for himself now. Does not eat very much now. I have found that he likes a smoothie in the morning so we have that and then maybe at dinner time he will eat something else. He started drawing on things about a month ago. Started with the newspaper. And then notebooks and I now have a coloring book for him. He calls it his work and likes working on it when he is up. If I am not careful he draws on his plate and food. He is only up for about 5 hours a day now. The rest of the time he is in bed. Not sleeping always, just resting in the dark. The only persons he knows are our SIL. Can call him by name and his Hospice nurse. His face just lights up when she comes to check on him. All his vitals are normal, just the weight loss. He has gone from a high of 280 to less than 170. I have not weighed him in the last 2 months. I just can't. I am losing him by degrees. Each morning just a little more of him is gone. I had to take my dresser and clothes and shoes out of the bedroom. He started putting on my clothes. I now have only one shirt and one pair of pants in the closet for him, if more are in there he puts them all on. Each time he showers he is able to do less and less for himself. Even with me coaching him he can't do it without me helping at some point. This is getting so hard. I don't know how the keep going. This is the hardest thing I have ever done.
I am so sorry. The shrinking is difficult to take since it is apparent from day to day and is such a marker. As you said, his face lights up, so there is still that enjoyment that he can feel and show. And it sounds like he has some enjoyment in food too.
My husband also increasingly slept and rested. Some of the things he told me- I would wonder if they were carryovers from his dreams.
blue, it hurts so much and I am very sorry. The weight loss is devastating and as you know one of my hardest battles. Have you spoken with his doctor about an appetite stimulant and supplemental food/drinks to help with the weigh loss? I know even on hospice these things were offered to Lynn.
In the midst of so much sadness it is good to hear that your dear husband is still finding enjoyment in his "work". Bless your heart for encouraging this small pleasure for him. Love and hugs dear ((blue))
The weight loss started two years before the dx. When he was eating a normal (or more) amount of food. The loss of appetite only started about a month or two ago. This is just one of the saddest things of this disease that I hate. Both mind and body just slipping away.
Ahhhhh, Dear Sweet Blue, Gosh this the hardest thing you have EVER done in your life. I am SOOOOO thinking of you. Our/MY journey is now behind us...it still hurts...like nothing ever.
I never thought I could do this...but, I did...and sweetheart dig deep...you WILL TOO.