I went to my Eye Dr. Yesterday because my yes are really bothering me. No need for change in prescription. My eyes are very dry and since I have severe sleep apnea and use a CPAP every night I thought maybe that was the problem, but not a usual cause. She asked me if I cry a lot and I told her about my DH and she said that crying those salty tears often can cause dry eye syndrome. How can a dementia caregiver stop crying?? We cry enough everyday to fill a large bathtub. At least I do and I can bet most of you do as well. I have noticed in reading your comments that even after our partners are gone, there are still tears.
Jazzy, I wish I could answer your question, because I would certainly like to cry less and smile (without tears) more. I certainly cry a lot more than I used to and some of it doesn't seem to be related to DH, but I suspect that because I am stressed as a caregiver then I am also overly emotional, so I cry while watching news reports if something hits my emotional trigger, I cry at the singing of the national anthem, frequently cry in church (which can be embarrassing because I sing in the choir and everyone can see me- LOL) often cry at the computer while reading posts on this message board, and I cry when I see or hear something incredibly beautiful - I think the tears will only stop when we cease to care.
I am so sorry that you are having this problem. I think that there is a prescription that can remedy your dry eyes ( I saw a commercial on tv). I hope that you can get some relief from your dry eyes soon because it sounds very painful.
I was thinking earlier about crying and your post gives me more reason to stop.
I was never much of a crier. Even a year ago, or maybe more, I talked here with Vickie about that.
Things can change. I think certainly starting in 2010 and persisting through when my husband left home for the last time in the Spring of 2012 I didn't cry much. Maybe a brief outburst in the car as I sang my heart out (I had started singing lessons because at "home" I was sentenced to silence).
As I have shared here with Coco- on her thread- I have cried more during the past couple of weeks than during those years.
It was the first year anniversary of husband's death, followed by the ten year anniversary of my best friend's death. In the intervening week my husband's father unexpectedly died.
I thought I would be much stronger than I am. Joan, I know this post can be considered off t but as Jazzy said "even after there are still tears".
I need to just smack myself to stop this crying already.
Abby*, let the tears flow, they need to come out after so many years of not crying, I am amazed at all the heartache we must bear even after the caregiving has stopped. Be kind to yourself, friend.