The same every day. I scoop of pureed orange, green, white and brown....come on, who would want that day in and day out. Dh just won't eat it, he plays with it, mixes it all together and leaves it. Dessert today was just the same as nearly every other day, a bowl of custard, that's it nothing with it. Sometimes he'll get a bowl of ice cream nothing else. One of the carers snuck him a pancake for morning tea with coffee. He took big bites and ate it all... I could see he enjoyed it! Not happy. They say he can't swallow, so they won't take responibilty. I'm asking them to try "minced moist", but first he needs to see the throat speech people again. What does your LO have for lunch if pureed?
Oh Julia, my heart hurts for you. With all the other abilities that my DH lost he can still chew his food. He doesn't wear his upper denture, so I had to ask them not to give him fried foods, but he eats pretty much everthing else. But now he has to be fed. He can no longer manage a fork or spoon, so I try to go in either at lunch time or dinner time to feed him. He still actually has a good appetite & will eat everything on the tray. I don't blame your DH for not wanting to eat the pureed food. Some of the residents in Tom's unit have that & it really doesn't look appetizing, but I understand the reasoning behind it. Can you take him food? Maybe you can take him something that you can cut up really small so that he can swallow it. I take Tom food all the time. Even when I go in at mealtime I always take him sodas & ice cream. (((HUGS))) to you my friend!
Julia I can see both points of view, but how boring for your poor DH. and for you to see what hes getting. at the minimum he should be getting a shakes of sorts that he can swallow! with lots of protein mix and fruits blended in. even peanut butter can be blended in. that is a source of nutrient and not just blands and he would probably suck it down promptly. if it were me I would have a sitdown with the dietician and see what he can have that's not a risk that still tastes good. maybe you can approve a menu set for him weekly? see whats on the menu and ask for specifics. mashed potatoes with chicken broth or macncheese or even blended meatballs all this my DH can eat fine. some days more than others. some days I do give more pureed depending on his awareness and lucidity but other days he does fine with more. and I would also bring in then a pancake or two if he likes it and you see hes able to get it down ok. if you have to maybe sign a release that if he chokes on it while you bring in outside food you take responsibility. I don tknow the rules of facility living but I am sure you can make his meals a bit more noteworthy even if hes having troubles. can you get some of those shakes nikki mentions they give to her lynn? ice cream popsicles he could eat too I would think. jello with mashed fruits and whip crème. its the perils of having them under someone elses care I guess. but speak to the diet persons. and have them note any changes in his charts. there are many creamed soups that are very tasty as well. I think its taste not the consistency so much.. I know its a challenge, best of luck. divvi
What about mixing a little barbeque sauce or steak sauce in the brown stuff, a little salad dressing in the green stuff, butter and sour cream in the white stuff and orange marmalade in the orange stuff? My brother was in a very bad farm machinery accident when he was young and had his jaws wired shut. He wrote a note to mom that said he was so hungry for stuffed peppers. She made some and gave them a whirr in the blender. He had a special feeding apparatus with a soft rubber tube that threaded through his mouth. The stuffed peppers went through just fine and he was able to taste them. I wonder if the problem is not the consistency of the food as much as the blandness. Just a thought.
Julia would it be too hard to take him a smoothie, maybe keep it in a cooler and shake it up when you get there.? Having that protein powder in there, and maybe a little flax oil , would be so healthy and tastes great.
ElaineH we also feed Dado but because his hand shakes so bad. He makes no fuss about it and it is like feeding a little bird.
Coco, Tom doesn't seem to mind that we have to feed him. In fact if I don't “shovel it in” fast enough he reaches for it with his hand!
Julia, I agree with divvi about seeing if you can sign a waiver of responsibility so that you can bring food in for him. She listed a lot of creative ideas!
Dear Julia, seems like we get one thing fixed and then we're faced with another challenge. Our experienced members have given you great ideas, I particularly like the shake suggestion. I know when hb was on a pureed diet, he so looked forward to his shakes and they were not as healthy as the ones divvi and coco mention but he sucked them down! Meeting with the dietician and trying to work out a menu that might appeal to him is a great suggestion-I found if you have a good dietician they can be quite creative. With my hb we used a lot of maple syrup on breakfast stuff-oatmeal, cream of wheat even pureed French toast. I found when I pureed macnchees the consistency was way to thick and he had difficulty swallowing it.
Other suggestions - pureed fruit with the custard, applesauce, pureed carrots, pureed pasta shells with ricotta and tomato sauce (hb really liked it even though it didn't look great). You can also fid pureed diets on the internet and take them in to discuss with the dietician.
I am not siding with the facility, but if they preformed the swallowing test and detected problems, they are obligated to keep your husband safe from choking hazards. It does make sense to me that they will not give him anything else without another test. Keep pushing them to get it done.
I know I mentioned this in your other thread but I think you need to call for a meeting with not only the dietitian but also the head chef/kitchen manager. It is the kitchen staff that prepares the food and make the menu's. I have found that they do appreciate a loved ones input. Our kitchen manger worked diligently to make sure I was happy with Lynn's menu and even gave me his private number in case I had any concerns in the future.
I know it is hard for us as a spouse to see the pureed foods, but what is most important is that our spouses not choke and that the foods taste good. I would suggest you taste the foods yourself. I have and I can truthfully say I would eat Lynn's meals, they are delicious! If there is something you do taste and find displeasing take it down to the kitchen manager and have them taste it, I have done that as well.
I found it helpful to think about how Lynn would have eaten these foods before. For instance, with meats, did your husband like a specific sauce or seasoning? Use it on the pureed foods as well. For potato, did he like butter, sour cream or gravy? Ask for these condiments to enhance the flavor to what he has always enjoyed.
Every week I get a menu to fill out for Lynn. For each option on every meal there is always at least two choices to pick from. If I feel Lynn would like neither option, I write in what Lynn would like. They have always accommodated my requests. See if they would they also have the option of filling out a menu for your DH.
Back in 2010 when Lynn had double pneumonia and pulmonary emboli he started choking on his foods. It wasn't that he couldn't swallow, he could, but the excess mucous made him a choke risk. We started with mechanical soft but then had to go to the pureed foods. Once he recovered he passed his swallowing test with flying colors and he has passed every one of them since. Lynn COULD eat solid foods, but he developed this quirk where any lump he had in his mouth his would spit out, often clear across the room! For whatever reason he no longer likes the feel of the solid foods in his mouth, maybe it is texture? This is the only reason he remains on pureed. Even if there is a tiny lump in his mashed potato, yep he spits it out. For this reason they have to crush his medications as well.
I mention all of this because I am remembering that your DH was in that horrid hospital and with the state of all he went through it wouldn't surprise me at all that he would have failed a swallowing test then. Now that he is doing better he could pass the next one. Keep pushing that they do one ASAP.
Thank you so much everyone for your input. For a while they let me cut up his food and feed him, but now they have memos to say I'm not allowed. I'm going in today to talk with the head nurse to see if I can talk to the chef / cook, and I'm more than happy to sign a waiver Everything gets smothered in either white or brown sauce...he hates white sauce. I feel like they are just taking the easy way out for them
marche, barbeque sauce or steak sauce on the brown stuff, supposedly meat, he would like much better, they tend to make there own gravy /sauce
Coco, Reno is very shaky too. I really like the idea of smoothies. I can do that. I'm tempted to take in some take away chicken nuggets that kids like and fat hot potatoes wedges today, they would be soft inside.
LFL, breakfast is just oatmeal porridge, nothing on it for flavor, honey or maple syrup would be good. He loves pasta, it's our traditional dish, I don't think he has ever had pasta there. He doesn't like yoghurt, but loves ricotta, we used to make ourselves together ricotta ravioli....I could do that, oh you really have me thinking now.
Elaine, thank you. I will see about signing a waiver. I can't stand to see that mush he's getting feed.
Divvi, yes, it's all about the taste, if it tastes good he'll eat it. I think they could add some pureed fruit with the custard and jelly. Even trifle is soft. Thank you , you have all given me lots to think about, I need to be more forceful in a nice way to make sure he at least has nicer food. When you think about it, that's all they have really left to look forward to.
My son #1 is a chef, he overlooks another aged care facility's menus/ food....but he is interstate right now and can't be here to see what his father is eating. Not sure he could do anything as this facility own their own catering company and most likely would not take too kindly to any criticism....but then again it might just be what they need. Hugs
A hospital dietitian told me that the last taste an Alzheimer patient can dissern is SWEET. Everything else has no taste at all, and that is why they often offer a pudding first to get them to eat and then alternate with bites of protein and vegetables. I tried to find something that would verify this on line, and found, instead these words by a Dr. Volicer when I googled "Taste preferences by late stage Alzheimer's Patients" . If this is legal, (??) I'll copy a bit of the article here:
Artificial feeding also deprives a patient of taste, says Dr. Ladislav Volicer, clinical director of the Geriatric Research, Education and Clinical Center (GRECC) at the E.N.R.M. Veterans Hospital in Bedford, Massachusetts. "Alzheimer's patients love sweets," Dr. Volicer says, "even in the later stages-things like milk shakes and ice cream." Artificial feeding also deprives patients and caregivers of personal contact, which is a meaningful activity. "We haven't had any tube feeding in the last 10 years," says Dr. Volicer, who often converts patients back to assisted feeding on arrival. "They can always eat to some degree," he says, "except during the actual dying process." Patients in the dying phase do not experience hunger and thirst, he adds. Problems with choking can be addressed by substituting thick liquids, such as yogurt instead of milk, and by using commercial thickeners. -
I worried so much about the last five days of my DH's life when they were not giving him food or water. His mouth was so terribly dry. This article reassured me that he didn't feel thirsty. I had not read that before.
It's been almost 4 years now.. and I still have some "what if" thoughts. I guess we all do to a certain degree.
Nancy B*, Thank you for this comment on feeding. I'm sad for your loss, and pray that it will get easier with time. Yes, I think there will always be the "what if''s" He does seem to like sweet food now as before it was more savoury...and his liquids are being thickened a little.
I had a meeting with Reno's new Dr, and he has now stopped the Clonazapan as he is no longer aggressive as before, and will only be given as needed. That Med was making him sleep all day, slept from last Saturday through to Monday , they said they were able to wake him for feeds...I really find that hard to believe as I couldn't wake him. The speech therapist will examine his swallowing again , a list / menu will be written up for my approval. I kept in mind and brought up all the food suggestions written here, and they agreed it could be better managed. I can also sign a waiver to feed him when I'm there.
I was a little upset to find Reno in a chair with what I thought was a restrainer belt...but it was a waist belt with "handles" to making it easier for carers help get him out of chairs without hurting him. ..he seems to be very sensitive to firm touch.
I can see he is declining very fast now, lost so much weight.
Julia, it is so good to read how assertive you have become! I am sure that there is nothing that would daunt you now. The sadness of it all must still be difficult for you but you have made such a difference in Renos' care. I take my hat off to you.
Thank you Cassie, This is the hardest thing I've had to go through in all my life. As I'm sure it is for everyone here. All I can do now is make sure he is cared for as best as possible. To see the love of my life end up like this is beyond heartbreaking. Hugs to all here.