Working title: Divi Takes a Trip Divi pulled out her suitcase to pack. Thirteen years now she had been care giving, and here was a miracle. She’d won a first class airline ticket to wherever she wanted to go, accommodation and meals included. She had given it a lot of thought. Reluctant as she was to go, she knew that her husband would be well cared for. She’d set it all in place when he’d first to be bed bound. Friends and relatives would check in daily with the paid care aides. Now to pack. For sure she would take….
Her bikini, can't go anywhere fun without a bikini!!!! And that was all she was taking. After all she had planned to buy all new clothes when she got to where she was going. Oh my now where are my tickets to.......
a beautiful turquoise cove..Once checked in and boarding pass in hand, Divi, joined the rest of the jetsetters off to St Thomas. she couldn't wait to get to the hotel for some warm sun and fun and those warm rays that would turn her lilywhite legs into a bronzed goddess! as she sat down in the boarding area a very good looking gentleman took the seat next to her. she couldn't help but notice he had Italian calf skin shoes and a gold watch, and a cadusa ring which meant he was a dr! excuse me, she said, I see your a medical dr, ...' a psychiatrist 'he stated flashing a bright smile, of gorgeous perfect teeth.. he asked her politely....
ps. ok you guys feel free to join in this soap opera !! and ladies feel free to make it fun and crazy:) we did a couple of these a few yrs back and they were such a hoot.
"I will," said Divi, "but first let me investigate what's going on two seats away. Now don't you all go away. I'll be back as soon as possible." "Pardon me, Ma'am,' she said to a tired-looking woman seated by an elderly man. "I'm an expert in the field, and my nose tells me you need some help. I have some Tenas handy in my purse - I've got in the habit of always having them handy for my DH. Can you manage on your own? I want to get back to that distinguished looking man wearing the Italian calf shoes who just beginning to stand up."
He'd watched her in the waiting lounge, he'd watched her lifting her carry on up into the compartment stretching showing her lilly white legs. He was in the last row of first class flying with the bimbo from the Sorbonne he worked with and he was concerned this lovely creature was mistaking them as a couple.
It was the only reason he could think of why she would be chatting up the Italian guy with the perfect teeth. Probably a dentist he thought opening his magazine.
"Tee heee hee excuse me" said the bimbo, having to pass over him to get to the aisle, and go down the the wee toilet. As she crawled over his lap, she brushed her fanny on his chest, trying to excite him. He cringed and could not believe it, it was the only woman who had ever made him feel creeped out.
Well wouldn't you know, the tired looking woman had dropped the Tena in the aisle, and bimbo slipped on it and went for a fall. Divi jumped to the rescue, she had another Tena that she used to mop up the head wound. Then, the Italian shoe guy blew kisses to another man across the plane, and Divi was bummed.
Bummed but not defeated. Divi glanced up and saw that a tall, good-looking hunk in the last row of first class was staring at her. She flashed her lily white legs and headed his way. He stood up to meet her, "Could I help you? Eh?" he said. A Canadian. Tall bugger, though. "Would you....
Just then a swarthy man stood up screaming in terrible english "I'm talking over the pain!" causing everyone around him to stare. "I'm tagging over the playing!!!" he screamed louder. He was extremely aggitated and was trying to get something out from under the robes he was wearing. A large man across the aisle stood up, punched him once, and he went down in a heap. It turned out he had smuggled a gun on board and meant to take over the plane. The emergency stop caused a lot of excitement and made the news. It turned out the large man was a sherrif from mendocino county and had previously been a boxer (Rutgers '56 he explained).
After some hours they were up in the air again. Divi wondered if her whole trip would be this exciting.
this was more excitement that she had seen in several years! cargiving wasn't especially newsworthy.she was especially bummed out the nice shoe guy was not interested in her but still blowing kisses across the isle.. and wondering why she hadn't used those shopping channel tan towels on her legs --knowing she would be stocking free and trying to look like the goddess she knew lived within before heading to the beach? the Canadian hunk, was definitely paying more attention than would be appropriate for a stranger. she would need to be on guard and decided the drink they could share was innocent enough. but she must remember that the Ativan she took pre boarding may not mix too well with more than one drink. she had a bizarre tendency to become very uninhibited if she mixes the two. but at this point she was free a bird out of the cage and on vacation! as she handed the drink to the Canadian, taking a longggg drink of her own she drawled as only a Texan an do... 'now just where are you stayin, honnneyyyy once we land??? I cant wait to hit the beach..!"" .. he answered in a deep excited voice...oops the planes starting to land! you need to get to your seat, maybe ...
He took her by the elbow to guide her back to her seat. "My name is Divvi," she said. "That's spelled with two "Vs", or one. Depending. And to answer your question, I'm staying at the Ritz-Carlton." "Depending on what?" he asked.
"Depending on what?" he asked keeping the conversation going. He was staying at the Fountainbleu. Not as chic as the Ritz; but, close by and near the beach on St Thomas. He wondered if she was travelling alone or with someone.
after de-planing and a rigorous tromp thru the st Thomas airport, she flagged down the taxi she has previously found to be awaiting her arrival. thank goodness for the internet and prebooking! the Ritz was in view and she literally ran to the lobby to checkin. the bimbo was standing in line in front of her and without notice turned and slapped divvi (this calls for the 2 v's)hard. her cheek was burning and her senses told her to strike this broad a fast one back. a huge brawl ensues right there in the lobby of the ritz. onlookers are shocked but soon begin wagering on who will be left standing. of course, divvi will prevail. lifting DH for 13yrs has left her not short of Amazonian strengths! (grin).. ladies ladies!!! the hotel manager is trying to calm the two... 'please, whats this about?"....we have an Alzheimers conference here this weekend and some of our guests are prone to outburst, is there a dr in the house?'
Dr Marsh came running from the bar as soon as he heard the plea for a medical professional. he had a few martinis too many, but knew a thing or too about outbursts and alzheimers. he sees the two ladies pulling at each others hair, and firmly says...
Enter Coco, left stage, shouting loudly and waving her arms. She grabs the blonde wig from March's hand. Then she turns and puts a strangle hold on Bimbo of the very thin hair and hustles her out of the front door and right onto the street. “Vamoose,” she says. “And good riddance. You and your saucy bum.” Returning to the lobby, Coco links her tattooed arm in Marsh’s. “Come on, Doc. There’s big guy, a Canuck, who got his hotels mixed up. We have to find him and bring him back. I don’t know where to look. We could ask Divvi. She usually knows everything. Especially legal. Hey, maybe we should start at the local jail." 'Hey, wait a minute!" cries a voice behind them. They turn around and see....
Me. Because my character is standing here waiting for a bus. At least I think he's supposed to be here. That's what the bimbo with the very thin hair said. She didn't look too good just then. Like someone who'd just been worked over. Maybe it was just windy where she'd previously been. Who cares? Where the heck is my character? Aren't I supposed to be in charge here? Oh, here he comes. Finally [roll eyes]
The tall canadian stood there waiting for a bus [finally] and pulled his map out to see if this really was the place to catch the bus to this Coral World Marine Park he was told he had to see. He wondered how long it took to get there completely unaware of what was about to happen to him.
Coco was so happy and elated to be in the story line that she pinches the tall Canadians butt, and in a loud beer buzzed voice tells him, "Where do you think you are going , the party is back in the hotel lounge!! You had better get in there quick or you could end up in jail with the way this story is going"
So Coco, Marsh, and the long tall Canadian, the cool glass of water, link arms and stroll in to the lounge. Coco looked so funny in the blond wig, it really did not match her macho tattoos.
There was that crazy Divi, or was it Divvi, never mind, there she was. She was back at the bottle, oh no they had to make sure she did not get to drunk to....
join Coco on stage for the hula. It should be quite a show! Actually, it was quite a show until Joan showed up raging. "Is this what you people get up to when I'm not watching over you! What an irresponsible bunch of . . ."
The german midget inside the tall canadian suit sitting near the front row was mildly concerned that while we all have to be responsible, it just wasn't right to deprive Coco from going on stage in the blonde wig and doing her hula dance naked.
Oh sorry. Not naked. I thought the brochure said that. My mistake. I was doing better waiting for that bus.
Actually Divvi was giving that arm tattooed Hawaiian Coco, a run for her money, swaying provocatively to that Hawaiian luau music! what coco didn't know is Divvi had been involved in a hot steamy affair with a Hawaiian dance instructor while single, and was quite proficient at moving limbs and feet to the beat- very well indeed. a show indeed. but the several drinks they both had finally started to creep up on them, and to the delight of the astonished crowd , they went to the audience and pulled Joan G up to the stage along with them. Joan was quite timid at first but soon the alcohol, antidepressant, and pain meds she was on soon had her smiling and ranting from the stage.. she surprised everyone when she...
came running a security guard, who rushed up on stage and pulled Joan off to the side. "Hotel Security, maam" he said in a loud voice, "I think you need to come with me." He quietly whispered in her ear "It's Phranque, Joan, I'm here to keep you from making a phool of yourself in public."
'Poor Buggers' .. Nikki had been left a handsome inheritance from several Nursing home patients who had thought her attentions to them were over and beyond human decency. but that was her agenda, always see the good and try to lend a hand to those in need. she was trying to avoid confrontation but seeing Phranque up on stage trying to drag poor joan by her neck scarf was too much. 'who the hell is in charge here?" blasted Nikki. about that time entered a multitude of folks who appeard to her to have the 'look' she knew only too well. 'well I will be a monkeys uncle... look who just walked in!! '...
Nikki stood on the sidelines watching, her eyes filled with tears. It was overwhelming to her to finally see in person so many of her mentors. She thought of all they had been through together, she wiped her stray tears and with determined strength she said "time to pull up those big girl panties." There had been far too many tears. She thought of Lynn waiting for her at home, she knew he would want her to join in the fun! A wicked smile crossed her face as she looked and saw Divvi and Coco start to do a provocative hula dance on the tables! Just then....
...the thin haired woman with the black eyes came back on the scene, and hit Coco over the head with a dragon fruit. It was smooshy so it did not hurt too bad, although some of the thorns got in her ears. As she swallowed her pride and sat down to tweeze them out, Divvi grabbed Joan's scarf and twirled Miss Joan in a spin, then spun it out in to the crowd and hooked the tall thin drink of water Canadian, (who was really a german midget in disguise). He went flying in to the crowd, and just when he got his balance he slipped on the blond wig that had been carelessly discarded. Chaos broke out. Phranque got over the fact that he might look like a phool, and he..
grabbed Mimi who'd just come in on a golf cart with a plate of Marional brownies for Nikki's Lynn. "You're not too late for the party," he said. "We're waiting for ol Don and his half of the dog, and then we're going to....."
Have a scavenger hunt. The list of things to look for includes traveling pajamas, a dog's harness, several wallets, a package of spices, numerous key rings, a red hearing aid and a pair of glasses. Ready, set, go!
Alert! Alert! Alert! Divvi is missing! Last seen with two airline pilots heading for the casino. She is wearing a Oscar de la Renta flora print dress with ruffles and very high heels. She may be considered dangerous,says a thin-haired woman who showed TVSCAM her bruised face and back eyes, which she claimed were inflicted on her by Miss Divvi. Excuse me, David; we have additional information. Also missing is the notorious Coconut Patti, a.k.a. Patty to those of her gang members at SPICE. She is considered to be extremely dangerous, imaginative, and moves in unexpected ways. Whether the two women are traveling together or have some nefarious scheme cooked up, is unknown at this time. Coco is said to be wearing very little. Keep listening. You can count on us for the latest updates. SCAM never lets its listeners down. David, get your hands off me.
mary75 and Bluedaze who are nurses, decided the marinol brownies should be distributed among the folks before the scavenger hunts begin.Miss Bama had already aligned herself with a group of younger gents, as she had decidedly shown being a 'cougar' was making her life much more enjoyable. Janet MarilyninMD and Wolf were discussing the best strategy to get the false teeth and depends off some of the conference folks and give themselves an added advantage in the scavenger hunt. Joan and Phranque decided the hunt wasn't for them and retreated to the bar for more embibing and joan was opening flirting with a man in uniform, she was so far gone she didn't realize it was the hotel bar waiter. 'lets move this party to the beach!" someone screamed over the crowd. 'lets start a bonfire, .. and skinny dip!" ..little did they know...coconut patti and miss oscardelarenta divvi were the first in the water!! all hell broke loose on the beach when...
(composed in the dentist's chair this morning, while getting a new filling)
A large ship, the sized of a corvette, headed towards them. It flew an Australian flag and standing on the bridge beside the Commander was Julia. She’d tuned into TVSPAM, "The station with all the news ,as it happens, brought to you with live coverage," and she had heard about an impending bust on the Spice gang. She immediately called her brother, who knows everyone worth knowing, and he called in the Auzzie Navy to help. Though why anyone would want to break up this party, Julia didn’t know. She adjusted her eye shade and wished she'd worn mascara. Bama did. And if Bama did, she didn't see any reason why she couldn't, too. On the beach was mm-mann doing his impersonation of the Beattles. He started to sing. “Hey, Jude,” came wafting over the waves “Hey, dude! The name’s Julia,” Julia shouted through a megaphone. The people on the beach many of them seemed to be stoned and were munching on Brownies - turned and stared at Julia.
While the man with the animal name lay in the shade of the space umbrella on the beach chuckling that his clean cut plan was working. He was zonked like a wet noodle because the natives had said the brownies were the way to go and he wasn't talking girl scouts and while he seemed to actually be able to see everyone waving like in one of those dream sequences in cheap movies he knew it must be that local cuisine he had just injested and that the Australian navy really wasn't there arresting the Beatles and the Spice girls.
Instead he focused on the weird alien feelings he was having inside and it was right then that he started chuckling and closed his eyes soaking it in. He'd suddenly remembered what that alien feeling was. He was feeling just fine right now.
Divvi abruptly awoke, and as she contemplated what had happened she was dismayed that it had all been a dream. A DREAM!! a funfilled lovely dream but nonetheless a dream. wow, what a vivid dream, so full of detail and color! as she crawled out of bed, she realized she had overslept and now had to do some fast moving to get her caregiving duties under way. she was smiling and hoping a new dream would repeat itself very soon, as it was such fun and only intensified her jest for being alive today..
The writers and actors all left, the post production people left, the camera and sound equipment trucks left, the hotel came down and cleaned up the props and tables and umbrellas from the beach...and so it was that four days later the tall canadian finally woke up in the storage shed where they had stored him and went out into the parking lot hoping to find his car.
It took a couple of hours to realize he'd never buy brownies there again unless they were from a bake shop and that he couldn't find his car because he was on an island.
I'm glad that it's been enjoyed. Have to confess that I laughed myself silly every time someone added their bit. I've had a few problems this past week, but instead of stewing over them in the middle of the night as I'm prone to do, I found myself laughing out loud at 3 a.m. at the outrageous antics of all. Thank God that Divvi got back to Texas with her lily white legs intact, that Coco didn't end up in jail for public mischief, and that Wolf kept his cool and may go into the baking business. For a while, I thought that Julia might not return to Australia, but I see she has posted since. Coco, too. I was afraid that she had snapped up the first screen writing contract she was offered . But she has posted,too. P.S. Even 2 trips to the dentist couldn't wipe the smile off my face. Zany, crazy, imaginative, energetic - it was great fun.
Oh man it was pee your pants kind of laughing. I found myself reading each and every word, and trying my best to continue on in everyones comments. Kind of like trying to get in each others brains!! I too Mary found myself chuckling throughout the day, wondering what that crazy Divvi was up to next!
It has been since 1973 that I went to jail, briefly! Ha! Don't want to go back!!
<mary75 isn't it baffling that when I woke up my legs were a deep dark golden bronzed goddess color?? hehe... very odd since it WAS a dream!
me too, I just love these silly charades. makes our caregiving a bit lighter and if someone finds a smile or laugh out loud its done its purpose. thanks to all who enjoyed reading and participating. next time we expect to see more posters if you get a whim.