How do you know when it is time to take over giving him his pills and how did you accomplish this task without a Big Bang up fight?.. DH is forgetting to take his pills on his own. I check to make sure they are taken after the time goes by, but he gets upset when I have to remind him to take them and says I am treating him like a baby and tells me to get lost. He forgot to take them this morning and I didn't check as he was really obnoxious, I should have known why, and he was really wired and bossy and mean in the things he said about me personally. I just refused to fight with him but that sometimes makes it worse. I found a job for him to do but called my son to come and help him as I knew DH couldn't do it alone. That worked and he is now sleeping. I check the med container tonight!! Dumb! Dumb me.
When I saw dh's memory was getting so very bad about 2 yrs. ago, I just automatically started giving him his meds which consisted of heart med, vit. D, gerd pill. 6 months ago he absolutely refused to take any more so I said okay but did manage to give him his 10 mg. of Paxil every day. I kept my fingers crossed until he had his physical two weeks ago. His heart is not as strong but his bp is normal, 115/75. No sign of heart failure. Dr. said I should rest easy and at dh's age(87) we should just let nature take its course. He shoveled snow all winter without any problem. I am doing the best I can.
I guess I was lucky because I just took his pills from day 1. At night, I just give him his pills and water. I found that when I just passed them go him he sometimes put them on the table and then I found them there in the morning.
I also take some meds so I take them all out at the same time and let him think I too would forget otherwise.
I just took it over and no conversations about it. I have to pick up the meds anyway and so I fill the pill boxes for two weeks and then order refills and make sure the ones that need a new RX are sent early. When DH comes out in the morning, I just get the gear out and before we have breakfast, I give him his water, and coffee and first we do the finger test for glucose. Then the Spriva inhaler, then I put out the pills, counting each one to verify I didn't make a mistake when I set up the boxes, then the Exelon patch is set out and finally the insulin is set..he gives it to himself. After we do all of that I take his O2 reading, HR and Wt and 3 times a week the BP is done. I write all the vitals on his calendar and take that to the doctors when we have appointments. There never have been any problems with it and he is happy not to be bothered with filling scripits and sorting out the pill boxes.
Early on we had a big fight over my insisting on taking over filling a weekly pill box for my husband, because he was forgetting refills. He didn't want to lose the control of sometimes taking extra, particularly of his sleep medicine. But it was too complicated for him: he takes 9 different prescriptions and 4 supplements. Once I took it over he never complained again and sometimes he reminds me it needs filling. Several years later I still don't remind him regularly to take his medicine. Most of it is not time critical and he catches up at bedtime if he sees the pills still in the box. But he is having increasing trouble opening the compartments, which will lead to my being more involved.
When Clare was starting to forget to take her meds (she used one of those 7 day pillboxes), I used a suggestion given to me in my support group. I went to Wal-Mart and bought a package of plastic pill packets ... I think they're 3"x2" ... and, initially together but now by myself, made up a month's worth of packets for her morning, afternoon, and nighttime meds. I placed a 2" piece of masking tape on her afternoon med packets and blue tape on her night med packets to tell them apart. Eventually, however, I had to eliminate the afternoon packet because she kept forgetting to take them when I wasn't with her, and I distributed those meds and supplements to either her morning or night packet. (Due to heavy duty heat meds, there are about 10 meds and supplements in both her morning and night med packet.) That lasted for about a year until she couldn't help me anymore without screwing things up, so now I prepare all the packets by myself, and simply allocate time to do about 60 months every 2 months. She used to be able to self-medicate when I'd simply say each morning, "Clare, don't forget to take your meds." Now I must physically hand her the packet and watch her take them in my presence. At night, same thing. Did she fight me initially, saying things like, "I'm not a baby; I can do this myself." Yes. But it was obvious that she couldn't, and at that point I could still reason with her, albeit with lots of tears on her part, that this was too important and I didn't want her to get sick because of something silly like forgetting to take all the right meds each day.
This was a big issue 4 years ago. L would insist that she could remember everything. She went as far as to mix pills into a single bottle when we went on vacation, of course had trouble IDing them. I wanted to move to pill boxes, she refused.
Fortunately her psych suggested pill boxes (we emailed over the subject) and said it is hard for a healthy person to keep track. L agreed and said I should fill them. Then we noticed her taking pills at wrong time of day or two days worth in one day. I then moved dinner and bedtime pills to cabinet, there was nothing dangerous or vital in her morning pills. I was surprised how quickly she agreed to me taking over, and she seemed to do worse with pills once I did take over. I think it was a relief not to deal with it, but getting her to give up that first step was hard.
I monitor T's filling of his pill boxes to make sure that he is putting in what he should for each day. And in the morning, I put his pill box on the table next to his plate as a reminder to take his pills, and I check them again when I move them off the table to make sure he did in fact take them. He takes his AD meds at night, so I keep them separately and hand them to him with a glass of water while he is watching TV in the evening, and wait to make sure he takes them.
Jazzy, he has never fought my help on these issues, so I have no advice to give on how to make it easier for you, except to say that in all likelihood, this too shall pass.
This has never been a problem for us. When he was initially dxd I started giving him the meds and found that if I took mine at the same time everything went smoothly. DH has never been in charge of the meds he's on for his dementia (fortunately he has no other medical problems) and has generally been good about taking them.
We have always used the 7 day pill boxes but he got so he took an hour to fill 2 weeks boxes and still made mistakes. I finally took over filling his when he was in another room. He was refusing to take the evening ones so the nurologist said to give everything in the morning. Then he was forgetting to take them so each morning I put them in a medicine cup and gave it to him at breakfast. He would still forget them so now I put them in a shot glass and put it in his hand and watch while dumps them in his mouth and then pass him some water. Then he get his coffee.
If I ever responded to a topic by saying "that was not an issue", I don't recall it. So maybe this is the first time I get to say that something, anything, was not a problem.
Initially, maybe 8-12 years into it, my husband took care of his scripts, refills and daily dosing. That declined from him getting his own meds from the containers to me filling a week long tray. By that time I was going along with him to almost all appointments and had to be more active in managing the meds. As time went on we went to a daily tray. Also, the med management in terms of the pharmacy was exclusively mine.
The time came when I did all the above plus give him meds three times a day. I would bring him orange juice and just hand over the meds for that am. I think he liked being waited on. He took about six meds per day, so I would do the same early afternoon and then earlier and earlier for bedtime as he increased the hours he slept.
If I sensed a reluctance I would just say "oh, you don't need to bother with it, let me get them for you and I'll bring (whatever), a mini-cupcake, cookies, etc. too." I also always remembered to say "thank you" to him after he took the meds.
Mimi- that sounds like so much! Also sounds like you have that routine down.
Jazzy- thank you for your kind comments on another topic last week.
My DW was on some dangerous and additive medicines. In fact, she almost got hooked on hydrocodone. She would take them to often and couldn't remember when she took the last one. In fact, she didn't care when she took the last one, she just wanted another one. The same with drugs like Seroquel. It is very dangerous and I had to avoid her taking more than the prescribed dosage.
Long story short, I discussed the problem with her Dr and he told both of us that she should only take her medicine from me. I got a lock box and kept her meds in it until she went to the nursing home. She never took a pill that I didn't give her after that.
Fortunately, that wasn't one of my bigger problems.
Like others have experienced this was not an issue for us either. Lynn was very healthy and never needed any pill before AD. Where he had never had any control over it, he didn't mind me being in charge of that. Like LFL, I took mine at the same time. Later, well into stage 6 is when our trouble started. He just didn't want to take them at all. Others here suggested I mix them with his food, or ask for liquid meds to make hiding them in the food easier. This is what I did and it worked fantastic. I hope it isn't the problem you are anticipating Jazzy.
mine also had no problem with me administering the meds to him, what was the issue is he would put them in his mouth then when I turned my back spit them out. be careful and not 'assume' they swallowed them. I found them under cushions , under pillows, under furniture. it was always a worry a pet would eat them off the floor. they can be very crafty. its best to give the meds and watch them wash them down if possible. check hands to see they actually didn't fake taking it. yes it can happen. :) divvi
lol Divvi, Lynn would spit his pills out too. I swear he liked to see how far he could make them fly :D His pills are now crushed very well to prevent this.
Thank goodness, I've never had this problem! He takes his meds fine - except the Ativan is so tiny, he sometimes doesn't get it down and it ends up in the water glass - but I always check that one- sometimes I just put it in his mouth and give him the water glass and make sure it goes down!
<quote>what was the issue is he would put them in his mouth then when I turned my back spit them out</quote>
Sounds like my cat. Since getting the new pill popper it has been worse.
Nikki points out something important. Sometimes you need liquids or powers (which can include crushing pills you have) so you can mix the medicine with food or drink, though do not do so without doctor's advice.
Sometimes you may want to change meds to one easier to deal with. When my wife was changed from Warfaren to Xaralto for blood thinner it made things so much easier because Warfaren has so many drug interactions and needs to be closely monitored. Approval for Xaralto was made last last year.