Well, hello everyone. It was slow going, but I am well enough to return to some semblance of normal, including finally writing a new blog. I invite you to log onto the home page - www.thealzheimerspouse.com - and read today's blog. It was prompted by m-mann*'s tragedy, my illness, and my experience in trying to arrange placement for my husband.
As I said in my blog, I have no solutions to the caregiving crisis. Maybe some of you have some creative ideas you would like to share.
I am so sorry, Joan, that your were so sick and had to work so hard anyway. How terrible. I am so grateful it was not something far worse. Joan, do every possible short cut to guard your heath. Say "No" more. Lots more. Hide in the bathroom more, reading your favorite book. Buy paper plates. Use shopping service to order and deliver groceries and TP. My LO lives in sweats (no briefs , socks or ironing). He's happier that way. Anything... My heart breaks for you. Be strong. And hide lots.
joan I hope you are feeling better soon and can find a way to lessen the stress you are under, =as are we all. caregiving is the most relentless painstaking task I think any of us have had to endure. it lasts for years not days. we have to adapt or crumble. everyday is a challenge to survive more loss and new stresses. I hope you find a bit of peace for awhile to recoup and renew your peace of mind. divvi
Joan,I wish there was something I could do to help you,You are really reaching the end of your rope. I ]"ve been tire of caregiving and my DH is not near the work Sid is. He is usually happy and easyto get along with but my own health has suffer just as yours has.This week he entered a NH due to a stomach bleed after a 8 day hospital stay.In all probability he will not return home,the house seems empty but at the same time I feel relief.Did you ever get that cat you talked about getting?As I said before, my cats are the greatest stress buster.Everyone says they are amazed I've gotten this far without physical or medical relief.I chalk it up to the cats,of course, I have nine and a stray cat yesterday brought 4 kittens to my barn. Should I send you one?
Joan - so sorry for your illness. I'm certain the continued stress of caregiving while you were sick delayed your recovery. The physical stress caused by the mental stress continues at our house, too. I was at the doctor this morning for checking my blood pressure. Of course it was high - because we have been fighting the "your license has been revoked and you have to turn it in to Drivers Services and stop driving" battle. The doctor finally confronted hubby and made him promise to turn in his license and let me drive. I'll believe it when I see it!
Please take care of yourself. Wish I lived nearer and could help out.
George's Caregiver -this might be totally out of the question, but could the driver's license be spirited out of his wallet & cut up like a credit card (or shredded), & tell him he had given it back to the DMV? Would he buy that? Just something I thought of while reading your comment.
Joan, I am sure others recognized this even if you did not. Your very writing and typing (e.g. typos) is very indicative of the level of exhaustion that you are operating under. Just reading the basic text shows that your cognitive abilities are below your previous level of functioning.
You are certainly at the end of your rope. . . . I dont know what to offer, but PLEASE dont let AD take you too :-( Jim
It is true that I am exhausted, but I am letting everything that is not absolutely necessary go by the wayside, so that I can get my rest. A good example is what happened yesterday. It was my day to drive Sid to DC. The bus always takes him home. The DC was having a "caregiver appreciation" luncheon, which meant that I would have to take him, drop him off, go back for the luncheon, sit for two hours with all of the DC attendees and some of their family members, then drive Sid home with me. Somehow, that did not seem like the "appreciation" I wanted. So I dropped him off and thanks to good couponing, spent the afternoon getting a manicure and pedicure. That was my "caregiver appreciation" day.
Mim - had planned to just get it out of his wallet and send it in, but the DMV provides a "photo ID" that replaces the license and he has to go in for that. If things do not improve with his attitude I will just take it out of his wallet and send it in - never mind about a photo ID - we could go get that later!
My Dh had his license suspended because of his dementia and no matter how hard we tried or what we said he still insisted on driving. Don't know if this would work for you but one of our relative's called our local police dept. ( we live in a small town) and explained the problem to them and in a day a sheriff's car pulled up to the house and two uniformed police came in and told DH that he was no longer permited to drive and they had him give them his license and sign a paper agreeing that he would no longer drive.. He was not very happy about that but I've had no problems about his driving since. He still complains about it but has accepted the fact.