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    • CommentAuthorDianeT*
    • CommentTimeMay 9th 2013 edited
     
    I haven't posted on this site for such a long time. My husband Mark was diagnosed July 2, 2008 with early moderate Alzheimer's. 15 months later I placed him in assisted living. He was in late stage Alzheimer's. He wasn't 65 yet so it was EOAD. Today he has been bedridden for about a week. His breathing is shallow. He has a rattling or wheezing sound in his chest periodically. He has not had anything to eat or drink for 3 days now. I don't know how much longer he can hold on. Hospice has made him as comfortable as they can. He has been running a temperature because of dehydration. His regular nurse thinks it may be a few more days.
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      CommentAuthorNikki
    • CommentTimeMay 9th 2013
     
    ((Diane)) I am so very sorry. Know that we are here to listen and offer our support. I know from our facebook group that you have spent all day with him, as sad as this all is, I am glad you have this time to share what is in your heart with your beloved Mark. Know that he hears you Diane, he knows you are there and is comforted by your presence. I imagine sleep is impossible right now, but do take some rests. I pray God shows mercy...... I also pray you will find the strength and courage you need to say this final goodbye. I am thinking of you constantly Diane, Love and ((hugs))
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      CommentAuthorNikki
    • CommentTimeMay 9th 2013
     
    As I head off for bed, I wanted to let you know I was thinking of you and Mark ((Diane)). I held Lynn just a little bit tighter today......
    You both remain deep in my thoughts, heart and prayers. ♥♥
  1.  
    That all sounds so familiar Diane. Thank you for sharing. Take care and know we are thinking of you and Mark.
  2.  
    Yes you will be on my heart too Diane. Prayers going out for you and Mark. It sure seems like it has all happened so fast..
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      CommentAuthormary75*
    • CommentTimeMay 9th 2013
     
    Sending you prayers and love.
  3.  
    My thoughts and prayers are with you. Your description brings back sad memories of my DW passing. While the end may be near for your loved one change is coming your way. Some good some not so good but stay strong and focused on what your future holds in store and keep your chin up.
  4.  
    Diane-as we all said on FB-we are with you on this last vigil. Peace to you all.
  5.  
    Diane: In March, I was where you are now. Almost exactly. It is a tough time and my thoughts and prayers are with you.

    God Bless and Thank You for sharing with us.
    • CommentAuthorJanet
    • CommentTimeMay 10th 2013
     
    Diane, as always, I'm thinking about you and Mark. I hope that, when the time comes, you are able to feel some peace and comfort.
    • CommentAuthordivvi*
    • CommentTimeMay 10th 2013
     
    wishing your dear Mark a peaceful passing Diane. hold tight in the days ahead.
    divvi
  6.  
    Diane, I am holding you and your DH in my heart.
    • CommentAuthorLFL
    • CommentTimeMay 10th 2013
     
    Diane, my thoughts and prayers are with you and yor beloved Mark during this very difficult phase.
    • CommentAuthorabby* 6/12
    • CommentTimeMay 10th 2013
     
    Dear Diane,

    A year ago I was about where you are now. The breathing, the rattle and wheezing scared me so much. Hospice, and they were wonderful, said that my husband was not in pain. They said discontinuing food and water was really humane. Nevertheless it is a heartbreaking vigil. Sending you prayers and blessings.
  7.  
    Diane, I made this journey three years ago. I know that there are no words that will make much sense to you know. My most heartfelt prayers are with you. You know how to get ahold of me on FB if you need to. We are all here for you. Just know that you have done well along this most difficult road and have did everything you could, who could more of any of us then what we can do. Love you!
  8.  
    magnoliarose* it's good to see your name again.
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      CommentAuthorJudithKB*
    • CommentTimeMay 10th 2013
     
    So many of us have traveled this road and we know exactly how you are feeling. We are thinking about you and our hearts go out to you. Hope you can get some rest and take care of yourself. Peace be with you.
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      CommentAuthorNikki
    • CommentTimeMay 10th 2013
     
    ((Diane)) I can't tell you how many times you and Mark have crossed my mind today........ ((Love and Hugs))

    magnoliarose*, yes so good to see you here again ♥
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      CommentAuthorAnchor20*
    • CommentTimeMay 10th 2013
     
    DianeT, I am so sorry to hear you are going thru this. I have recently dealt with exactly what you are having to deal with now. It isn't easy to watch it happen I know but I know you are a strong lady. Music really seemed to help Kathryn relax while going thru this and you might want to give it a try. It doesn't need to be soft music just whatever music Mark likes. If you need to talk please feel free to email me at jgb182@gmail.com or if you need to talk email me and we can set up a time to talk by phone if it will help you in any way.

    JimB
    • CommentAuthorlulliebird
    • CommentTimeMay 10th 2013
     
    Diane, You are in my prayers. May God provide you comfort and peace....I am so sorry to hear your report.
    • CommentAuthorFiona68
    • CommentTimeMay 10th 2013
     
    Diane, I will hold you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
  9.  
    This has got to be so hard...I hope you can get some rest.

    And follow the advice of all our *s. They are so wonderful to be on this forum and be of service to all of us who are facing this or will in the future in spite of their own heavy hearts. Our *s are true unsung heros and heroines. Bless them all.

    Words are not adequate at such a time as this. I hope it helps some to know we are with you and hold you in thought and prayer.
    • CommentAuthorDianeT*
    • CommentTimeMay 10th 2013
     
    It has been a tough day. The minister read him his last rites this afternoon. I cried but after he was done I felt at peace. Mark's breathing changed almost instantiously. He is on Oxycodone for pain now. He is changing every hour. I had friends and family visit throughout the day. Now they are gone and it is quiet.
    • CommentAuthorlulliebird
    • CommentTimeMay 10th 2013
     
    ((Hugs)) to you Diane
    • CommentAuthorabby* 6/12
    • CommentTimeMay 10th 2013
     
    I agree with JimB above.

    My husbands decline was very swift. For that final vigil I took to him what I had downloaded on my android. It was the same music I had downloaded over the preeciding months; it's purpose initially was to comfort me.

    Yet, it was the music of the 80's and the 90's -what we grew up with. I think that more classical music may have comforted, but there just was not time.
  10.  
    Diane,you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
    May you have peace and comfort in the coming days.
    • CommentAuthorDianeT*
    • CommentTimeMay 11th 2013
     
    I have played a lot of music for him. When he became bedridden, I brought a radio in. My daughter was here a few days ago and read to him. He rallied for a little while. Now as I sit here in his room listening to the sound of his breathing and the oxygen machine, I wait for him to cross over. I know he will be in God's hands soon.
    • CommentAuthorandy*
    • CommentTimeMay 11th 2013
     
    Dear Diane, praying you will have a peace that passes all understanding and grace to go through this difficult time.
  11.  
    We had music when my dh was passing and it seemed peaceful for all who came to say goodbye to him. It seemed surreal to me then. My prayers for you and your family. Grief is hard.
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      CommentAuthorNikki
    • CommentTimeMay 11th 2013
     
    Tears and more tears....... my sister just told me I should stop coming here because it seems to upset me so greatly, what she doesn't understand is that we are family, when one of our own is hurting, we hurt with them. You have shown great courage Diane, I pray God will soon answer your prayers. You are loved ♥
    • CommentAuthorbqd*
    • CommentTimeMay 11th 2013
     
    Diane, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at this difficult time.
  12.  
    May peace be with you both, Diane. Thinking of you.
    • CommentAuthorElaine K
    • CommentTimeMay 11th 2013
     
    Please know that all of us here are with you in prayer. Take care of yourself.
  13.  
    Diane Valdés Tomasevich


    Mark Raymond Tomasevich
    November 22, 1944 - May 11, 2013
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      CommentAuthorNikki
    • CommentTimeMay 11th 2013
     
    *sobs* thank you for letting us know Nora.
  14.  
    Diane, I am so sorry. As Nikki said, we keep coming back to see how others are doing. Your words brought back memories of my losing Gord. It is an incredibly painful time. I wish you strength, love and support. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
  15.  
    Diane, My tears flow for you and yours. We are family.
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      CommentAuthorBama* 2/12
    • CommentTimeMay 11th 2013
     
    ((((HUGS))))
  16.  
    My heart hurts for you, Diane - and the rest of us. Peace.
  17.  
    Support and great love going your way Diane, I am so sorry for you loss. Please take care of yourself, and know, that though we can not be there in body, we certainly are in spirit. Wonderful people like you , so many, prepare us for what is inevitable.
  18.  
    DianeT

    What can I say that has not already been said? Perhaps one little thought....

    When I was going through this with my Dear Helen, I always tried to look at
    the bright side. Many here will say there is no bright side for this horrible
    journey but I believe if you look hard enough you will find one.

    For me, during the worst times, I gave myself credit and was proud of myself
    for the way I was handling the bad situations. I would even sometimes brag about
    how well I was doing on this site. I would keep thinking, this can't last forever,
    and that when it's over I will be much stronger and wiser for having gone through
    such a trying experience.

    I think you're doing OK Diane..........Hang in there......GeorgieBoy
  19.  
    I agree with Nikki...there are tears for you now and for all of those who have gone on this final journey before you and for those of us yet to face this..
    We are all here with you in spirit sitting vigil with you. You are not alone.
  20.  
    Diane, I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
  21.  
    Echoing the sentiments here Diane...peace to you.
  22.  
    Diane, my thoughts and prayers are with you. Your DH is now free and at peace.

    Ruth
  23.  
    Dear Diane:

    I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that you are in my prayers for the time ahead. Mark is finally at peace and now it is time for you to have some peace as well.

    Shirley
    • CommentAuthormary22033
    • CommentTimeMay 11th 2013
     
    I'm sorry for your loss Diane. Prayers for peace and strength for you and your family in the coming days.
    • CommentAuthorDianeT*
    • CommentTimeMay 11th 2013
     
    As shared above, my husband, soul mate and love of my life left this world and descended into heaven just over 4-1/2 years after he was diagnosed. He will forever be missed and can never be replaced. I wear my star with honor. Thank you for all your heart felt thoughts and prayers. It means the world to me.
  24.  
    Diane, I am so very sorry for your loss. I pray you are able to find peace in your heart and know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.
    • CommentAuthorabby* 6/12
    • CommentTimeMay 11th 2013
     
    Dear Diane,

    I am so sorry. Last year a poster here said to me "think of the joy he felt as he was released from this disease".