It has been a little over 2 months since Lloyd died. I still miss him every day, but I try to keep busy. I have gone back to work for my sister at her tanning salon 4 days a week/4-6 hours a day. I am saving up to take a road trip back to North Port, Florida and stay at my ex SIL's house. I will be taking my friend Melissa with me. Some of you may recall that I never thought I had it so bad when I thought of her. Her father, brother, and sister have all died and she is left with only her mother who has AD and she is caring for her. Well, our friend Jerri and I decided today that I should take her to Florida and Jerri will stay with her mom. I am kinda excited about doing something like this with her and for her. When...I am not sure. My first great granchild is coming in June and I need to know Bruno (my grandson's dog) will be taken care of and that my sister will be ok at the salon. Then I need to take some money out and we are on our way. I will definitely be taking Lloyd's ashes along. Whether or not I can bear to scatter some in a few appropriate places along the way, I have no idea. If it's the right time...I will and if it's not...I won't. You all are in my thoughts and prayers constantly. A lot of you are still going through the day-to-day struggles of caregiving. I ache for you. There is life after if you can survive. There were certainly times that I thought Lloyd would outlive me. I used to hope that I could live one minute...one day longer than him so I would be sure that he was cared for. I kept all my promises, achieved all my goals, have no guilt and no regrets. All I have left is his ashes and that brings me great comfort having him with me. I will love him to the moon and back forever. Ours was and still is a love without end.
Linda, I have been wondering how you were doing since Lloyd passed. I am glad to hear you have returned to some semblance of normal. Have a really great trip - you deserve it.
I, too, had been wondering about you, Linda. Your update made me smile. Day by day we must keep moving forward. Hope the trip happens soon and is a big success!!
Linda - so good to have the update. You are a jewel to think of your friend and take her with you on your trip. I have my first great-grand she is a precious little girl the best since the grands were born. Hope your trip is everything you want.
Little delay. I broke my ankle a week ago and all plans are on hold. Came home from working/bonding with my sister and took Bruno for a walk. He got a little frisky and I twisted my ankle and heard the pop. Had to call the grandsons to come and pick me up out of a yard a block away and around the corner. Was hoping to be able to walk it off, but thought I should get it checked out. Alas, it is broken, but I've heard breaks heal faster than sprains or torn ligaments. Have a boot and have started walking some. I was caged up in this house for years and I'll be damned if I will stay down!!! Of course, the day after it happened I mentally thought I was screwed and would never walk again. Thank God I got that out of my head!
Linda, I am so sorry to hear about your accident. Make sure you follow the doctor's orders regarding reduced activity on your leg for the first couple of weeks. You want it to heal correctly so you can be off on your adventure. Take good care of yourself!!
You WILL get through this! In the past, I have broken both feet & badly sprained both ankles (not all at the same time !!). Believe me, the sprains were much worse than the breaks - not that I wish to repeat ANY of it :)
A beautiful day here - at least outside - not so much inside! DH has been so confused today and now tonight. Wants to know if we can pay our hotel bill and go home! I can't get room service to answer! Been in bed about 2 hrs., got up, took off his pj's, put o his shoes and socks and said he was ready to go. Guess another Ativan is in order.
Vickie, I'm sorry to hear about your DH's distress. My DH has been like that so often in the past several weeks. My stomach just clenches up when I hear him coming downstairs in the morning as I think, here we go again. We recently put him on Haldol and that has reduced that anxiety/anxious behavior. He is still unpredictable and wanders around looking lost, but at least he's calm. Hope your evening is peaceful.
Update - it has been 10 days since I broke the ankle. A sports doctor put a compression boot on it a week ago and I have been walking more and more. I have to wear that damn thing to bed and it is so hot, but at least I can get take it off and get in the tub. Last night I actually drove to Lloyd's cousin's about half an hour away. It wasn't so bad since I can adjust my pedals and use cruise control on the highway. I was down the first few days. Swore that I would never walk again. It's a phase I go through. Then the tenacity kicks in and I get up and go. I am there now. Thank God!!!