Each time I sign in on this site, I am grateful to read what others have posted. I know I will find something that will help me to cope. There is always the spouse who feels like I have felt or has had a similar experience. There is new information that I find helpful.
I thank Joan for her making this site possible and the countless members who sustain it by their willingness to post and share. I am so glad to have a place to express my feeling and be "heard".
To those many who visit. We are happy to help you.. If you would like , try posting. We would love to hear from you all!
Well said, Lorrie. Joan is on my permanent prayer list! I give thanks for her and this site everyday.
Gus is mild and we are in very early days compared to many here so I was reluctant to start posting at first. I hope those who have a recent diagnosis and just found this board will start to get involved - I've already received so much help.
Lorrie, because of your positive experience, I went to a support group meeting and really found a lot of help there. I mentioned The Alzheimer's Spouse and no one had heard of it (majority were spouses, which was great). Everyone wrote down the URL, including the social worker/moderator. It made me feel great to be able to contribute something to the group.
I'm so glad you found a good support group too. I feel good that I could help as others have helped me.. I have continued to attend the weekly support group I found. Caregivers are a special group of people and the caring and compassion shown to me by my new support group helps tremendously.
Coco I have been told by many that this beginning period is one of the most difficult times.
Everyone, no matter what stage their spouse is in, has something valuable to contribute and in turn be helped.
This site has been a blessing to me. We all are connected by one common bond that no one no matter how will meaning can idenify. To have a spouse with any form of progressive dementia is the very most lonely and frustrating thing to go though. Where are our friends and family during this? I moved from out of state to be closer to my son and family...only to have them spend Thanksgiving and Christmas out of state without me...I call my son and he's too busy working. Yes, I get it. They have their own life, but even the President of the USA isn't that busy. When I do manage to get a call as soon as I say some thing about my hubby (this is his step-father) he shuts me up and has he has to run. I wish I had never moved here. At least in my former city I had close friends. Now I haven't got them near by. I wish I could curl up in a ball and cry. I HATE THIS DISEASE AND WHAT'S IT'S DONE TO OUR LIVES!
You are right. We all feel the same pain. When you said I want to curl up in a ball and cry, I knew exactly that feeling. There are no words for the pain this disease inflicts!
lulliebird, I know the feeling about moving and having no close friends. We moved here 5 1/2 years ago just before I knew he had problems. The move seems to have brought it to the surface. He was the one who wanted to move but the result is the same. I have no close friends here. One neighbor in our development has been friendly but she lives a totally different life from me.
I joined a support group but it meets only once a month. I go to a Senior Circle group when I have a chance but it is getting so I can't leave him alone any more. I do now have someone come in twice a week but don't have a friend to go visit. Today I went for a haircut and I do my grocery shopping during those times . I want to do something fun!
MaryinPA, Gosh it's too bad you don't live closer ( I am assuming you're on the east coast)...I am on the west because you'd have a shopping partner and friend to have a cup of coffee or a glass of wine. Yes, it's terrible not having any girlfriends to do these things. When we moved here hubby really declined and I didn't expect his health to rapidly decline. I haven't been here long enough to bond with any one. Yes, I have neighbors who seem friendly enough...waves and "hi how are you" but that's about it. I am on the same boat as you as I am finding it more and more difficult to leave him alone for more than a hour. I want to have fun and kick up my heals and laugh. C'mon over Mary...it's sunny and warm her\e, my swimming pool is heat and I live close to the mall too :) Oh BTW, I make a mean marguarita. MARGUARITAS ANYONE???
I live on the west coast too lulliebird....those marguaritas sound great to me. I too moved three years ago to be closer to family to help with my dh. When we moved I thought he probably would last about 5 years. Well...he only lasted two years in our new location. Never had the time to make friends before his decline that went too fast occured. Now, that he is gone I have decided to move again. I will be moving about 20 miles away in a community for 55 years and older people with lots of activities, etc. If I had to stay here I too would be gone in a year because I am so lonely I can hardly stand getting out of bed. Now that I have made my decision to move I am coming out of my depression.