I am writing this from my hospital bed and it is not FUN,,,,, Have been here since TThursday.had a migraine stroke that affected my right arm.....of course I am right handed, so this is not easy I am ok and the arm is doing better....Daughter has been caring for Paul with help from granddaughter. Both have decided We must have Super POWERS to do this all the time.
I am so sorry to hear of your health problems. Yes, it is when they have to take over for us that other people realize it takes Superman/woman to do this caregiving 24/7.
I hope your doctor will not release you to go home until there is someone else - family or a facility - to take care of your husband. YOUR health is top priority.
I posted this comment on the "BAK could use your prayers" thread, but I will post it here as well - Prayers for a speedy recovery Betty! Glad you have your Daughter to care for you. This served as a wakeup call to myself....We all need to take care of ourselves!
Hope you have a full recovery. We begin to think we are super people when in reality we aren't. Take care and know that you are thought of and prayers for you...plus some super Hugs.
I thought this was the perfect thread to post under, no no no we are not supermen or women.
I finally could not take this cough anymore, and went back to the clinic one more time. WOW! I have full blown pneumonia! And I had already been through the antibiotics, inhaler, codeine syrup, steroids...
the doc was amazed, and what a routine I went through today. First, they put me on a breathing machine. Then they poked my behind with penicillin, and my arm with another steroid substance. I had to go the the local small hospital for x rays and blood drawn. She put me on a whole nother round of antibiotics, and gave me some strong pill to make me sleep. (whew, I slept 4 hours this afternoon.)
Called "Dado's place" and told them I would be there tomorrow. They said he is doing fine.
SO, as Betty says, we are not super. Wow, I have always been extremely healthy. I picked the bug up right during last months crisis and look what happened.!! AM already feeling better though, what with the steroids maybe I will bulk up like Arnold lol.
This is what I have been afraid of, getting sick because I am wearing myself down. I hope that you feel better soon but we are not superwomen or supermen even though others want to tell us that. I think they say that just because they think they couldn't do what we do (or they think they couldn't) Has any of the caregivers actually died BEFORE the LO? It is possible! All I can say is take care and do all you can to keep yourself from getting to worn down.
deb, yes many caregivers die first because they neglect their own health while immersed in caregiving as well as having all the stress to deal with by doing everything yourself. The PBS special on alzheimers hosted by David Hyde Pierce (2007 or 2008) presented some statistics that many caregivers die before the person with dementia. Very sobering but you can see how it happens. Do take care of yourself.
This occurrence was actually studied by doctors in a Mormon community in Utah. We dementia caregivers have a higher incidence of cancer and other diseases than people the same age who haven't been dementia caregivers. Shows how terrible the stress level is.
Charlotte, you're not alone in losing it. I remember screaming at Claude a few times the last few months before he passed on. I felt very bad afterward but the stress just gets to you.
I lost it this afternoon when he went in to take a nap on the bed with soaked Depends on. I have had to strip the bed every day for the last 4 days,2 sheets, 2 blankets, matress pad and 2 "waterproof" pads. I had only just finished getting it all made up again and he is refusing to go change. I did manage to get one of the disposable pads under him.. When he finally changed when I went to call him for dinner, the Depends probably weighed 4 pounds.
maryinpa there are plastic Sani pants that can help to hold the wetness in if he refuses to change. of course you have to get them on him when he does allow it. maybe its time to try to get some inhome help that are trained in working with dementia patients and can over see his incontinence issues. its always hard to make the decision that its time but leaving them to their own is not a way out either. eventually the urine and inability to get them to shower could cause infection and rash.
I agree with divvi, it might be time to get some help! I hope you are insured in order to get the help, in our state of NM that means Medicaid. I have been told that they know how to MAKE them do the things that we can not get them to do. I have no idea how but that is what I am told.