Although I don’t post very often, I have been a daily consumer for over four years. I have gone with many of you on your nursing home placements and the trauma of watching a loved one slowly die (Phranque for one) and wondered how I would cope when my turn came.
This morning was my turn and the experience was just as unique as each of yours that I have followed. My husband was in the later stage six—incontinent, walking with much difficulty, confused talking. The last several months he had been sleeping straight through the night without getting up to use the toilet. Last night he woke up shortly after five and wanted to go to the bathroom. With help he made it to the toilet but then was unable to stand up. I called my son who lives nearby for help. He’s had EMT training and the first thing he did was take his blood pressure. His blood pressure and pulse were normal. My son had to literally drag him back to bed. Ten minutes later he had stopped breathing and was dead.
He had no pain and no trauma—it was so peaceful—but very unreal. My daughter-in law and sister-in-law came over. We spent several hours with him and then called the authorities who then took over—police officer, coroner, funeral directors—who each one did their thing.
So when we say that each Alzheimer patient is different, their way of ending things is each very different also.
FYI: My husband was 82, diagnosed as probable Alzheimer's 12 years ago, so we have been on this journey for some time.
Dear Lori - So sorry to heard about your DH, but he had you and his son with him and things were not prolonged. My DH also just stopped breathing, for us it was 10 years. You have my condolences and blessings that you have family around. Betty
So sorry Lori that you have this grief to face during the holiday season. There is no season that is right but you seem to be expecting the end and you sound like a very strong person. Just know my prayers are with you and may you have the comfort of knowing that you will be in our thoughts as many come here to read your post. Hugs.
Dear Lori, you've had a long journey, and I think that you will have peace knowing that you were a blessing to him. I will keep you both in my prayers.
So very sorry for your loss Lori....take comfort that it was a peaceful passing and you was with him till the end. Prayers and thoughts are with you and family.
Lori, I am saddened by your loss and praying for you and your family as you honor your loved one. Thankful that he passed peacefully knowing you and family were near. May that be a comfort to you in the days ahead.
Lori, I am sad and sorry for your loss, but it was a blessing that he passed so peacefully. Sending thoughts and prayers for you and your family for strength and comfort.
Lori, Please accept my condolences on the loss of your dear husband. How wonderful that your son and family were able to spend some calm time together before all the officials bustled in.
Lori* my heart and prayers your way today. I am so sorry for you sadness. Thank you for sharing the way it happened, oh how I would wish that for my guy too. Hugs to you, peace, and healing.
Dear Lori*, I too am so very sorry for your loss. I am however glad that his passing was so peaceful after 12 years of the Alz sttruggle. Prayers for you and your family.
Lori*, I'm so sorry to hear about the passing of your husband. He had a quick & peaceful passing. Now I hope you can find some peace in the coming days to help you through this difficult time.
Dear Lori....may all your happy memories and the knowledge that you where there for him throughout his illness sustain you in the coming days and years ahead. Peace.
Lori*---Your DH was blessed with a swift and peaceful passing. Be comforted that you did your very best to see him through his journey to a far better place. Peace be with you and your familky as you celebrate his life.
Thoughts while waiting to be picked up for my husband's funeral: I've lost my husband but, when I concentrate too much on that, I tend to overlook the fact that my children have lost their father. My daughter-in law and one son-in-law lost their fathers at a young age so my husband has also been a father figure to them. They have all been so helpful in things you don't think of--making CDs of the music for the sound people, putting together a powerpoint presentation of his life pictures, arranging a photo display for the viewing, arranging child care for the 11 great-grands under the age of 5 and on and on.
This all feels so strange-----and I'll post it quick before I think too much and delete it.