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    • CommentAuthorbiddie12
    • CommentTimeSep 14th 2012
     
    My name is Bridget and I just found out that my Husband has Alzheimer's on Aug 10th. He is taking Aricept ,now 10mg. he did start with 5mg. since I found out I now do the food shopping, I pay the bills, I set up his meds for him, I do all the driving. He does try to help me around the house, but I have to watch him alot, and double check everything he does. Today is our Wedding Anniversary 38yrs. It was sad, because he forgot. He is 63yrs old. He was already getting Soc Sec REG. But I took him to Soc Sec and told them he needed to apply for Disability Soc Sec. We made the appt. and I brought all the paperwork from the Doctors, and his meds. We went this week on Wed. The very next day he was Approved for $400.00 dollars more than what he was getting. It will start in Jan. People told me I was crazy, but I told them ...He is Disabled now. So I hope I can learn how to use your site. It looks hard.
    My best to you all. I have alot to learn...Bridget..
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      CommentAuthordeb112958
    • CommentTimeSep 14th 2012
     
    Welcome biddie12 but sorry you have a need for the site. You'll slowly figure out how to use the board. My husband will be 63 in a couple of weeks. He was diagnosed with FTD at 58.
  1.  
    hey biddie12, first off Happy Anniversary. I am so sorry you are going thru all of this. It is not an easy disease on anyone. You have definitely come to the right place for lots of love, help, and mental support. I have to say we are the best group around.....lol...... You are going to get a lot of people saying you are doing something wrong, but just do what you feel is right. I pray you have lots of support from family and friends as that is most important. Keep posting and reading the other post to get to know us. Nice to meet you just wish it were under different conditions. Hope your weekend is good.....
    • CommentAuthorPasnurse
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2012
     
    Heh Biddie I did join this site. Thanks. I too am a caregiver for my 66 year old spouse dx @ 59. It ain't easy.
  2.  
    Biddie12
    Hi, welcome to the site. I am sorry that you had to find us. My DH is 60 and was diagnosed at 55. You will get a lot of support and help here. Happy Anniversary.
    • CommentAuthorLFL
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2012
     
    Hi biddie12 & pasnurse. This is a wonderful site with caring, knowledgeable members who can offer advice and experience for almost any challenge you may go through. My husband is 62 and was diagnose with FTD in 2008 at 58.
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      CommentAuthorol don*
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2012
     
    mammie did you get your mail thursday???
    • CommentAuthordivvi*
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2012
     
    welcome to Biddie and Pasnurse! biddie congrats on the anniversary but as we well know its bittersweet with our spouses unable to reciprocate.
    divvi
    • CommentAuthorPasnurse
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2012
     
    Thanks for the welcome.........
  3.  
    Welcome Pasnurse and Biddie.

    Happy Anniversary Biddie.
    • CommentAuthorms. magic
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2012
     
    Hello Biddie and Pasnurse.
    Glad you found your way here.
    There are so many good people who can offer help, hugs and empathy.
  4.  
    Welcome to the club folks. You will find unconditional love and support here. My husband is 59 and was diagnosed 3 years ago. Of course, I knew for a few years before that, that there was something going on. Sure enough.... diagnosis confirmed it.
    • CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeSep 15th 2012
     
    Welcome biddie Pasnurse. Yes, there is a lot to absorb after diagnosis. If you husband was just diagnosed last month, it sounds like he was pretty well into the disease before getting the diagnosis. My husband will be 65 this month and was diagnosed in 2008.
  5.  
    Welcome to you both. You will find many members here whose spouses have younger-onset dementias. My husband was dx at 60 with MCI, probable AD. All dementias are tough, but the younger-onset ones seem to bring special problems to the table.
    • CommentAuthortexasmom
    • CommentTimeSep 16th 2012
     
    welcome biddie and pasnurse. my husband was diagnosed at 53, is now 60 and requires 24/7 care, but we have kept him at home since he has never exhibited any violence---would yell, but now doesn't speak at all, and seems calm most of the time. our next decision will be when he can no longer come down the stairs safely.
    Interesting biddie that when your husband moved from SSI to SSDI that he got a raise---good for you! He will also qualify for medicare, but I know those rules have changed a bit since my DH qualified.
    Take care, and you will learn so much from this site.
  6.  
    Welcome biddie and Pasnurse. This site is full of useful info and caring people who will understand what you are going through. I also am an early onset member, my husband is going to turn 60 in a couple weeks. Sometimes it is so discouraging but here you can vent and members will understand. Sometimes I go for weeks just feeling like if I open my mouth to vent I might fly apart and disintegrate into a mewling mass of despair.... but I continue to visit this site and realize the people here do understand and share what I feel because they also are going through similar situations.
    • CommentAuthorWolf
    • CommentTimeSep 16th 2012
     
    Welcome to both of you. Put me down for one of those mewling mass of despairs grendelsma2 mentioned.
    • CommentAuthorLFL
    • CommentTimeSep 16th 2012
     
    Wolf, new picture?
    • CommentAuthorWolf
    • CommentTimeSep 16th 2012
     
    I was a lot younger then I'm older than that now.
  7.  
    Welcome to biddie and Pasnurse, my husband is 63 almost 2 years in. Stage 6 on the Fischer scale seems likely.

    I am an immature 57.

    The mewling mass of despair mentioned twice already, can be vented here for sure. In fact, I had such a bad one one day, I deleted it 10 minutes later. I knew that someone would catch it , and they did, and I was glad. This is the most unreal place where NO ONE JUDGES our freak outs.

    Make sure to use the "search" option for just about anything. You will likely learn more here than anywhere.
    • CommentAuthorAdmin
    • CommentTimeSep 17th 2012
     
    To Biddie and Pasnurse,

    I started this website in 2007 because I couldn't find anyone who would talk about how I felt - I thought I was the only one feeling the way I did about what Alzheimer's Disease was doing to my marriage. I needed a place that dealt with my unique issues as a spouse of an Alzheimer patient. This site is now a place of comfort for spouses/partners who are trying to cope with the Alzheimer's/dementia of their husband/wife/partner. The issues we face in dealing with a spouse/partner with this disease are so different from the issues faced by children and grandchildren caregivers. We discuss all of those issues here - loss of intimacy; social contact; conversation; anger; resentment; stress; and pain of living with the stranger that Alzheimer's Disease has put in place of our beloved spouse/partner.

    The message boards are only part of this website. Please be sure to log onto the home page - www.thealzheimerspouse.com - and read all of the resources on the left side. I recommend starting with "Newly Diagnosed/New Member" and "Understanding the Dementia Experience".

    Both of you are dealing with EOAD(early onset AD- now called YOUNG onset)members - there are 4 sections on EOAD - two of which focus on the young teens whose parents have EOAD There is a great section on informative videos, and another excellent resource - Early Onset Dementia - A Practical Guide. You can go to the top of this page, click on "search", and type in EOAD, making sure the "topic" circle is filled in. All of the EOAD discussions will come up - there are about a dozen of them.

    Do not miss the "previous blog" section. It is there you will find a huge array of topics with which you can relate. There is a "search" feature on the home page that allows you to look up different topics that may have been explored in a previous blog. Log onto the home page daily for new blogs; news updates; important information.

    joang
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      CommentAuthorm-mman*
    • CommentTimeSep 17th 2012
     
    Wow in the world of dementia this seems to be babyland. Forget the old folks it seems we all got the younger onset.
    I am 54 my wife is now 62 symptoms begining at age 55, quit work at 57.

    Welcome to all, sorry you have to be here but of all the dementia boards on the web THIS ONE consistantly offers the best support through real solutions and practical suggestions.
    Jim
  8.  
    Welcome to both from an older couple. DW just turned 70. A belated anniversary wish Bittle, I'm 71.
    DW was Dx'ed in '07, I was in denial for a year or two before, she's now Fischer stage 6. A victim of the wrong gene pool, her Mom had AD too.
    I couldn't agree with Jim more! This is the site for real life understanding, honest and open advice, sharing medical experience and real time practical solutions. Chances are if you're having a problem, another member will have had or is dealing with a similar issue
    • CommentAuthordonna L
    • CommentTimeSep 17th 2012
     
    hey brittie and pasnurse, welcome to the site . my dh was dx at 52, he just turned 58. i will turn 51 in about a week. happy anniversary. the meaningful days lose meaning but thanks to the wonderful people here and the knowledge it makes it better then it could be. my dh is full blown stage 6 moving into 7 but he still can walk and walk and walk....if you get my picture. not many words anymore. i would love to be one of the ones that could keep their spouse at home but with work full time even from home it is getting harder. caregivers are pretty good until he decides he is going to take a swing at them luckily not much strength behind the swing anymore. anyway that is us in a nut shell. much love to all that post for me to read at 11pm before closing my eyes to my happy place. dreamland!
  9.  
    Welcome Biddie and Pasnurse - sorry you need to be here. But as already stated, you will find not only a wealth on info, but the best place to vent ever! No judgements, just love and support. My DH was diagnosed at age 58, he turns 67 today. I am 10 years younger, and believe me, I know the struggle. I don't post often, but I do read the message boards everyday.Welcome, and keep coming back!
  10.  
    So much good reading and learning here. Welcome Biddie and Pasnurse.
  11.  
    Welcome, Biddie and Pasnurse. My wife and I are of the older persuasion - she is 82 and I am 81. She was diagnosed 7 years ago. Since early onset is much rarer than the older group, my theory is that the older people are not computer literate, so can't join. Also, there are many more women caring for men than men caring for women on this site, although overall, there are more women with AD than men. I think this is due to women being more willing to share their feelings. Another possibility is that the older women have outlived their husbands, so are being cared for by their children.
    • CommentAuthorxox
    • CommentTimeSep 19th 2012
     
    I think the last theory, of women outliving their husbands, is valid.
    • CommentAuthorLakegirl*
    • CommentTimeSep 19th 2012
     
    hey biddie12 - Welcome to the site. My husband was diagnosed this last spring in moderate to late stage. He will be 80 and I am 64. I would recommend reading, "creating moments of joy". While there are alot of pressure in many ways as the caretaker - I find most of mine from the lack of support and understanding of his children, from taking over all the finances and all decisions, all the driving and just being alone in this. People do not just understand.
    All that said, while my hubby doesn't want to bath much and that is a fight, most of the time we get along just fine. My goal is to have the very best day each day because I know there will be a time that that will no longer be possible. Right now I am russeling with the decision to list the house for sale and move to a condo.
    It is our second marriage - and we've been married 19 years this last August. It is hard to loose have the team you have counted on for the last 20 years. I know he trusts me to make the right decisions - I just hope I do. I love him more than ever and miss him even more too. Happy Anniversary - try to find a way to enjoy the time you have left together. Some of my friends say "bob is lucky to have you to take care of him." My reply is if it was the other way around, he would be here for me. God Bless you both.
  12.  
    Welcome, Biddie and Pasnurse....You will find so much help and support here.
    Anything and everything you'll need to know about this horrible desease is right here, I read the posts everyday, and I find comfort here knowing I'm not doing this alone..
    DH is in a NH, he is 73 and has been there 2 months, I'm finding it hard seeing him decline so rapidly now, in these last 2 months I have seen the biggest decline. Each week, each time i visit from one day to the next, he seems to go down a little more.
    He seems to be losing his speech now, not sure what stage he's at, most likely 6-7.
    • CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeSep 22nd 2012
     
    Marsh - we have talked about that before here that many 70+ are not computer literate. I for one am grateful for the older ones AND the men on our site. We all have something to share - wisdom, experience, sympathy, empathy, knowledge, etc. and the men have helped us as much as the women have helped them.