I am starting this tonight before reading the other topics- because of my own need.
Husband will remain in the hospital for at least another few days. They feel he cannot yet be evaluated for skilled nursing rehab because he remains unable to respond to any question other than "what is your name?" Considering this, there is no neuropsych eval possible at this time.
The mri came back and its narrative report (I have no access to the disc) says that in addition to the cerebral atrophy there is now vascular damage and also added to the dx is "psychotic dementia".
Husband's nurse says he will need intensive rehab. Depending on bed availability they hope to send him to a rehab that has a special dementia/AD unit as well as in house residential hospice. Because of his age, they are still hoping to find another cause for all of this. Of course, this is not the first time- I can't imagine anything that has not already been screened- not necessarily now, but over the years.
Marilyn, you give me credit where I don't deserve it. I have, especially over the last couple of days had hallucinations myself.
General N has really lost interest in H as the dementia has progressed and the cerebral damage so extensive. To be honest I fear the hospital will lose interest as well and just send him here in a taxi. This is the first time I have been alone in my house in 18 months. It is a 35 year old house and makes noises of its own. I hear these and I think it is H making noise, slamming a door, whatever.
The sweet nurse said "there is no way you can take care of him on your own."
But I have been, right? I have been and the last the neuro said is that this can go on for another thirty years.
Abby, I am so sorry for what you are going through. Listen to the sweet nurse not the neuro, just because he said it can go on for 30 years it doesn't mean you can. Let the doctor's take care of you husband and you take care of you. I hope everything works out for the best. God Bless.
I agree with those guys. And not only sleep deprivation/sounds, but there is a stress factor to this which is really beyond our ability to fully register. I mean, I have tended to be able to handle the preceding years of alzheimer's with a somewhat even keel, more often than not. But the acute kind of phase that so many of us seem to have hit this year will topple you over and over again. So you have to forgive yourself for that, and use self-care techniques wherever you can. See the "Caregiver Resilience" thread. Apply early and often.
My heart goes out to you and when I go to church this morning you will be uppermost in my prayers. Please try to take just one day at a time. I don't think they will just send him to you to deal with. Build yourself up by getting as much rest as you can. Any decisions you make will be stress-makers. You want to be prepared and as strong as possible.
Abby--I'm not a doctor, but my reaction to the possibility of your husband lasting another 30 years sounds off the wall. As I understand it, AD gradually damages more and more of the patient's brain until the body just can't sustain life anymore. If your husband already has cerebral atrophy (a beginning symptom, I think--usually the hippocampus shrinks first in AD) and vascular damage as well, plus the psychotic symptoms, the disease is clearly progressing. It sounds to me like the doctor is putting too much weight on your husband's relative youth with this and not enough on what's actually going on.
It is good you are being told you can't care for him alone. A solution will be found. Try to calm down and start to do some good things for yourself. What do you enjoy the most? For me, the quickest fix would be to go shopping. Or buy myself a ton of flowers, get something new for the house or garden, get hair or makeup done, etc. Instant gratification is the idea. Go pamper yourself a little--you sure deserve it. Keep posting and we'll all get you through this together.
Oh dear Abby, how can any of us get through what you're dealing with right now? Take emily's advice and read the "Caregiver Resilience" thread, especially the exercise thing. Seems like a long walk outside in the fresh air can relieve stress somewhat. Love and prayers for you.
Abby, yes, a bit of self-indulgence is in order for you now. Get some sleep if you can, do something just for you. It will help renew your spirit so you can better handle the next pase, whatever it is. I am so very sorry you are going through his very difficult ime. But as Marilyn said, we'll be here to help you through it.
Abby - I think that sometimes doctors - like everyone else - say things that would be best left unsaid. This doctor may not have considered how his choice of words would affect you. Everyone on this board has heard words that they never wanted to hear and had that cold sinking feeling knowing that life would never be the same. My heart goes out to you because from all comments you must be young and I'm so sorry for what has come into your life. It is easy for all to say about taking care of yourself - and I don't always do that - but it is good advice. (((hugs))) from me too