My DW has been in a memory facility since July of 2011. She can no longer speak or feed herself. She has not spoken in three years.
The facility received a new male resident this past week. Yesterday he raises a ruckus at the MH. He had the dining room in disarray, tables and chairs every where. He was pushing chairs towards other residents like he was determined to do them harm. My DW was one of the residents he was trying to push the chair into. My DW would not be able to ask for help if he was trying to do her bodily harm. He pushed one of the chairs into a nurses aid and bruised her hip. He was on all fours and crawling like a baby and was making weird noises all evening. He also walked past me and hit me in the ribs. What do I do if he hits me again? Do I deck him or just let it go?
The other residents were scared of him and some asked me if I would stay longer until more help arrived. I said I would. I go up to the MH every evening to feed my DW and I usually leave after dinner. But last night I stayed longer .
I realize he has an illness and may not know what he is doing. My feeling is that the other residents should not be put in harms way and worry about possibly be hurt. Who is responsible if he does bodily harm to a resident?
What options do I have? I plan on visiting with the administrator today,
The day I was moving my husband into the ALF, a male resident hit another man who already lived there. Later, I noticed that the hitter was gone. I asked what happened, and was told that the "victim's" family requested the hitter be removed, and he was. I think you're certainly within your rights to ask that the new resident be removed, as well. It sounds like he needs a stay in a geripsych unit to address his behaviors with medication.
The question of who is responsible is a good one--not sure if it is the facility, or a combo of the facility and the person's family.
It's also very sad from the point of view of the "offending patient's" family. I can imagine their bewilderment concerning ''what to do with him now". The safety of the other residents is paramount of course but there's pain enough to go around.
oh goodness. bengy this is a real situation where this resident needs a medical evaluation. you will do well to powwow witht the persons in charge. take notes while there. tell them you and your wife are fearful of this individual and have it noted. they have to address your concerns or the liability will become more than likely theirs and the person doing any harm. most times an atty will sue anyone associated with the person or facility and hope something sticks. there is always more money associated with insurances that cover facilities. but they do sue individuals or their representatives also. if he is in sexual exhibition this is one topic i have always been concerned over as we know AD has no boundaries or inhibitions. i think marilyn is correct this guy needs to be in a unit til his meds are ironed out and hes compliant enough to live with the other more docile residents. this is a time when yes we must step up and protect our loved ones. ps since you know hes got issues if it were me i'd steer clear of him and keep your wife away from him til hes more manageable. decking him would probably bring on problems for yourself since you are the sane one and in a care unit where individuals are under care. of course you have the right to protect yourself but i would just stay clear of him if possible. yes very stressful for the family for this person as well. we know how difficult it is to find the appropriate medications to help them continue to be safe. divvi
I would be talking with someone of authority to address your concerns. With his behaviors being so bad I can’t understand why he was placed there in the first place. I agree with the others, the poor bugger needs to be reevaluated in a safe environment. Logic tells me it is the facility’s liability to keep the residents safe as they are entrusted with the care of the residents. But law and logic rarely mesh.
Please don’t “deck” the poor guy. I agree you need to protect yourself and your wife, but not to the point of causing him physical harm. If it were me I would insist he be removed. Tough situation for you, I hope it gets resolved very soon so you can have peace of mind again.
I thought once a person was placed in a facility that facility is responsible for their safety, i.e. other residents. My SIL was in a facility in Ohio until she hitched a ride to town to buy cat food. They didn't have lock down so they had her moved to an Alz. facility. They couldn't be responsible for her wandering off...they said.
I just returned from MH visiting with the administration staff and I felt like I was talking to the wall. They said, we have to give the resident time to adjust. He has only been here a short time and we have to observe him, to determine his status. They said, he wife said he wasn't like this at home. Big whoopee, I'm sure this didn't develop over a day or two. Also the staff did not handle this correctly, is what they said. I replied, how do you know you were not here to observe. I was informed that to day he was a pussy cat. Nice and calm. When I got there he was sleeping in his chair. I will be going back again to feed my DW her dinner and to observe. I hope that yesterday was an isolated instance.
Bengy - Put your complaint in writting give one copy to the administrator and have her sign the copy you keep. You'll be surprised how much more action you get when the paperwork starts. Also keep a journal about what is happening. God forbid something bad happens but if you have a journal of events that could be important. As staff I do this with our aggressive clients to protect myself in case myself or someone gets hurt.
Chemical restraint - is what they will probably have to do and I wondering if his behaviour is only in the evening...sundowning.
Yes, I am keeping a journal with all the happenings at the MH. The outburst I was referring to, happened between 2 PM and 7 PM. I usually have my phone with but this day I did not. I will make sure to have it with me from now on. Thanks for all replies.
It sounds as if he needs to be confined somewhere so he doesn't offend others. You would think they would have a quiet room aka padded room where he would go until he behaved properly. I just feel sorry for a family that is told they have to remove their LO because he/she acts inappropriately. I would think there would be an alternative where the person could be removed from the general population.
Sad to say, it was my DH who attacked people and threw furniture around, including a birdcage with the bird still in it. The police were called & he was taken away in handcuffs to a lock-down mental facility. Meds helped & the facility took him back--only because they could control him again. Not fun for the family of those out of control, especially when you know your LO was a dear, sweet, good decent man who would never knowingly act that way. If the facility is not doing what you think they should, it's the law that a poster must be posted in the facility with the number of an ombudsman who will help you. I've heard of residents no facility will take because they are a danger to other residents & staff, God knows what the family does.