As usual, Joan, you really speak of what is in all our hearts and minds. I am so grateful for this website. It eases my mind a bit to read that others are going through this and I am not alone. I have always been ready to thump people who tell me that they know exactly what I am going through because their Aunt Loony had AD. They know nothing till they have dealt with this disease which makes a stranger out of our husbands and wives.
I think women like to chat. I see it in department stores, doctors offices, resturants. It's a primal need we have. AD is so isolating we lose alot of the chat time. So sites like this richly fill that need. We know that chatting probably won't fix the problem. Maybe it'll throw in a few ideas, maybe not. But it feels so good to just chat with someone; to tell them of our crazy worlds and then get some chat back... Yes, they are sad stories... And sometimes funny stories... But it feels so good to tell them. I turn off the computer at the end of the day and feel like a person again!!! I think maybe it's just a women thing...
If "it's just a women thing" then me and the other men on this site must be getting in touch with our feminine sides. Obviously, it is not gender specific. It is gender-neutral. Alzheimer's doesn't care who it beats up! Young and old, male and female, and all those within a few heartbeats of patient zero. I know I have a genuine desire (if not need) to share my travails with others. It's nice to know that I can come here and do so without getting slapped around the head and being told not to whimper. The common thread that binds us all is the incessant dual pressures loneliness and despair. Know that you will always have someone here to help you with your fight.
Joan, that was a lovely story about the gentleman who continued to go to the nursing home everyday to share breakfast with his wife. This site is just wonderful; to be with others who are experiencing what I am, with their spouse, not their parent. My DH has been going downhill really fast these last few months, and I find such solace at this website, knowing I'm not the only one who's dealing with this awful disease.
My DH is sliding faster and faster. Big drop in the 6 months since Aricept was added to the Namenda that started almost 2 years ago. MMSE went from 26 down to 16. And we still have more than a month before we can get in to a Neurologist. Meanwhile his PCP is doing her best. It is so true that whether one is a husband or a wife it really makes no difference to the fact that one half of the marital union isn't up to par and the other half is working overtime emotionally, and physically.
I just had to deal with my DH refusing to go to the neurologist last Tuesday, and being angry with me for making the appointment because he doesn't like that doctor. Why? Because that was the doctor who told him he has AlzDisease, and that he shouldn't drive. That he remembers! Where he lives he can't remember, but that the doctor told him something he doesn't want to hear, that he remembers. (LOL) I have found a gerontologist who specialized in AD, so that's my next step. I'll call and make an appointment. Hopefully, we'll make this appointment.