Well, maybe she's 19. She's been working for 3 weeks but she is certified. The agency sent her along to help my husband while I'm up in Maine for the next two weeks. I have another CNA, older, AZ-certified, who comes on Mondays, so they both came today. She seems very sweet, and not daunted by helping him dress after his shower, but... I've gotta get those WHO TO CALL IN EMERGENCY forms filled out pronto tonite!! Our daughter will be around to take over when she leaves in the afternoons...
Our California son and DIL came back from Maine today and I took them to the airport to fly home. We'd traded off: they did one week here and then got the week on-island. Today I said, the reason I wanted you to come was to spend time with your dad and see how he really is; if I have to put him in a NH I want you to understand what I've been dealing with. They got it!
I asked if there was anything they'd recommend I do to make things easier to deal with him and the one thing they suggested was that I get a replacement shower in the upstairs bathroom (he has a hard time getting out of the tub-shower, in spite of the hand holds). Has anyone done this? Would having a big shower (and no tub) depreciate the value of the house when I go to sell, do you think?
Today after I went to the airport and picked up a few last-minute things I came home to find him, at 3 pm, sitting with a glass of sherry in front of him and the dishwasher running away (on just-cleaned dishes). I blew up in a way I seldom do, so he went upstairs and got undressed except for his whitie and pulled the covers over his head!! I had to go retrieve him when it WAS time for dinner.
I don't know why but the use of water - re-doing the dishes, staying in the shower forever, running the water up to the brim of the sink when he wants to brush his teeth - gets to me more than almost anything. I tell myself water is soothing. But not for me!!
Briegull, all the articles I've read indicate that big showers ADD value to your home. As the population ages there is more need for "handicap" accessible bathrooms. Many baby boomers are re-converting there homes now so they can live longer in their homes. So don't worry about converting and ditching the tub.
briegull, Is this bathroom a master bath or the only bathroom? Families generally want a tub in the family bath. As for masterbaths, again, most people want the option of both, although people usually have their favorite, and this may be the only concern for a given family, but not for the general value.
How much are you talking about in cost (don't forget the impact of destruction, construction)? Another consideration might be how long this would be helpful for. Have you considered/tried a bench that he could sit on from the outside and slide or be slid into the tub?
It's the only full bath; our house is just about 100 years old, a center-hall colonial with the bath over the downstairs hall, and a "powder room" tucked behind the stairs downstairs. That's what worries me; my kids always liked the tub but maybe that's old-fashioned of me. I have tried the bench but he has this leg which sticks out almost straight when he sits down, which makes that bench thing almost impossible to use. OTOH, I'm not sure how much longer this would be helpful for.
And OTOH again, anyone buying this house (desirable suburb) would probably do some major renovations to the bath in any event, so maybe I should just go on and spend the money; I'll have to spend down to get Medicaid eventually... Has anyone used the bathfitter thing?
briegull, By bathfitter, do you mean the company that puts a liner type of thing over the existing tub to create a new surface?
Removing an existing tub in that type of construction may be an expensive change. Something to consider. And yes, removing the only tub from a one bath house would be detrimental to the value of a house.
I bought a house this past fall and passed up a house that had only a shower in the masterbath mostly because of resale value. (It did have a tub in family bathroom). Just my take. And we are shower people....
Briegull, the water issues have been discussed several months ago. Running water seems to soothe them. My DH was always running the dishwasher even though the dishes were clean; watering the yard just after it rained; leave water running in the kitchen sink while he was cleaning the stove; and washing the hand-washed items so slowly that I gripped the arms of my chair to not get up and get him to stop. I finally started getting up immediately after eating and run to the kitchen to wash the dishes myself. And guess what? He would go in there and move them and run more water!!! It drove me crazy! However, THIS TOO WILL PASS. It was more bothersome to me than the shadowing!
I'm going to resurrect this topic. We've been getting along okay with a CNA on Monday mornings only except that I had them frequently during the weeks I was on Monhegan. I've been thinking about getting more help; things are not getting worse at the moment but I'm going a bit stir-crazy.
I've been thinking about asking the agency that I've been using to send more people out; the ones who have come seem to be fine. I've felt comfortable because they're bonded and reliable. However, today I found out that a favorite deli counter woman has left to take CNA training. I left my phone number for her to call me..
So my question is:do any of you hire an individual (as opposed to someone through an agency)? What do you do about insurance or ss or bonding, etc? Any advice?
briegull-it goes both ways. If you know and trust the person that's great. Cost will be much lower. Negatives-if she can't show up for any reason you're stuck. What happens if she gets injured on the job-check your homeowner's insurance on that one. What about taxes and SS for her. Hope nobody's looking but consider paying cash or writing a check to cash rather than her name.
its a double edge sword, agency takes care of all the taxes, insurance etc which is much better but they do charge more for doing all that. in my case while i am using for a couple of times a week 4xhr at a time its ok and they are reliable. i had another lady lined up for sometime to work in the future not from agency and she dropped out and i never heard from her anymore. so if you arent going fulltime yet, maybe the agency is a better deal. when DH needs 5daysxwk then i will consider individual person vs. agency..divvi
Briegull About the shower issue. We built a new house 3 years ago and we put a full-size walk-in shower in the Master bedroom. It also has a built in seat in the corner and handicap handrails. My family bathroom has a shower/tub combination with handicap bars and today son in law installed a makeshift handle dangling from the ceiling.
Husband got along fine with the walk-in shower until I had to help him with the shower. It is easier for me to help him in the tub combination. I put a seat in it for him to set on and I reach in by the shower head to wash and rinse him. He can still climb in and out of the tub by using the rails we installed. He is having a problem raising himself out of the seat with one hand to wash his buttocks with the other so son in law today installed the dangling handle from the ceiling for him to grasp to pull himself up.
The Hospice used the tub the same way to shower my Mom before she got to the point of just hand bath.
I would not take out your tub because of future buyers but if you don't have a combination of handicap bars I would recommend that.
Briegull The Hospice aide who gave my Mom baths, also has private patients. She charges only $10.00 an hour. She was never here an hour with Mom and she is very good. Sounds pretty cheap to me given gas prices now days. But even at $20.00 for a bath would be worth it in my book. When husband gets to the point of not caring I aim to have her come 5 days a week to bathe him - if he doesn't qualify for Hospice. You might have something similar in your area.
I saw a NEW tub advertised this weekend, and it looks like a sunken tub, but has a bench in the back with several sprays that are adjustable and rails. They claim it fits in a tub's space. If I see it again, I'll get the name of it and post it here. It is for people who can't climb into tubs any more.
Guess what??? On family assistance...my son and daughter-in-law were talking about my 18 year old grandson who graduated from high school in June and wants to join the Coast Guard in about a year. I have been interviewing people to stay with my husband. It finally hit me - and I called them (they live in Hawaii) and asked if he would be interested in "working" for me for room and board and a small salary for a year. They all said yes!!! I know my husband will be happier having his grandson for a companion, and so hopefully he will be here in a couple of weeks! I'll let you know how it goes....
That is great Mary! I am sure you must be very exicited about having your gs stay with you too! Let us know when he gets here. Hawaii........have always wanted to go there
If your grandson will be helping DH and living with you, they will have a wonderful chance to bond. This is really a win-win situation. I really hope it works out for you.