My husband came down stairs late this morning and I told him that I had applied for a promotion. He said, "I am proud of you. You would be good at it."
A gift - because that is how he always was with me before the AD. He urged me on to graduate school and suffered through the long night of writing and editing papers and the thesis. In frustration I would holler down the stairs - "This was YOUR idea, you know!" He replied, "Yes, I know, keep typing."
So much of our life is structured around his needs, he doesn't like it, though he needs it and gets very anxious for himself too often. But, this is another reminder that he is there for me as much as he can be.
We survive this stuff because of love.
I have learned more and more to take care of myself so that I can take care of us. God, this is all so hard. Simple gifts, gifts that are given freely, - the hymn says that it is a gift to come to where we ought to be...
Peace to you today, unwilling members of this extraordinary community.
Thank you metamorphosis. It is a bittersweet gift to get a glimpse of who our loved ones used to be. "unwilling members of this extraordinary community" --that is very well said. I often think of us as soldiers right at the heart of a colossal war.
I try to remember, every hour of every day, how lucky I am that my husband and I have had many years of a close, loving relationship, to help carry me through the rough spots.
It saddens me so, to see others here who have had only a short time together before the AD began to steal the "true" spouse away, or those who have had to deal with loveless relationships the entire time together, and now have to deal with dementia. How do they survive, I wonder ... ?
My husband is 20 years older than me, and he was 54 when we got married (2nd for both). I never expected to have him for 31 years, and despite AD now, I consider myself so fortunate to have had him for so long. That's a gift. You're right, Sunshyne and Metamorphosis, and shoegirl.