I just wanted to wish you all a happy Christmas! (in spite of the situation at hand) I love having my babies home and their spouses. It is also good for them to be with their father. It not only makes them realize how Dad is doing and also to see what I have to deal with. More understanding all around. My dd and her hb went shopping for a new chair for dh for Christmas because I redid his room, vinyl floors, new setup for more ease to get around etc. My daughter told the salesman it had to be waterproof because he pees. Her hb shushed her but she said well we want a good one! Later I caught her and her brother in the hall whispering about how she had to clean up urine down the front of the cabinets in the bathroom because he uses the sink sometimes as a urinal and then still misses! She keeps saying how hard it is because he used to volunteer coaching youth sports and was so athletic etc...it is sad. But I am joyous to have my lively children here to cheer me up. They are in early twenties. My elder son cannot be here but my granddaughter will come today also. Yippee children.
Of course while we were shopping one and a half hours away dh decided to go to his office. (He is no longer working but he owns building so goes there to check it out) He dropped his keys between car seat and then got out of car to get them and locked himself out. So someone in building let him in where he sat at his desk for 4 hours until we got back to bring him keys and rescue him. I asked him why he didn't ask many of our neighbors to just drive him home and he said he didn't think of that. Another lesson for all.
From 4:00 - 10:00 p.m. I volunteered to be my hb's monitor at the care center, which means I followed him up and down halls, cajoled him to NOT go in other people's rooms, helped him eat, tried to engage him in simple games/activities, sang with him. Walking is good for me; walking is good for me; walking is good for me, etc., etc.
Hb has a 1-1 relationship w/maintenance man, housekeeper, bookkeeper, etc. All volunteers from the center to keep an eye on him. Time for nighttime meds has been changed; so no monitor required between 10 and 6 as he's been staying in bed most of the time during those hours.
I'm blessed; he didn't argue w/2 staff when they took him for potty break, brushing teeth, putting pj's on. Wasn't the case when I was his sole caregiver.