I think this is my first time initiating a discussion in here. I just came to sound off at the end of a long, trying day with my husband who suffers from Alzheimer's. I do not know how to spread what little patience I have left to get me through the entire day and night. Need help from someone. Thanks
Midge-here take hold of my hand,I know just how you feel and am running low on patience too. But as you will find this is a great place to find help and hope. Come as often as you need(open 24-7 just like our caregiving jobs)someone will be here to lend an ear or two !! Hugs and prayers to you.
Maybe it is because you are not getting free time away from him...can you leave him alone?? This has been a major problem for me, but I have hired some help and I hope it helps me.
Glad you are here. Tell us a little something about you and you dh. How long have you known he has Alzheimer? It does get easy for some when they have had it for several years. My dh has gotten real mellow for the last 9 months after a 7 month trip through hell. He is going into his 6th year before long.
There are few secrets here and we all rant, pour our hearts out, swear, cry, and are so much better off when we let it all hang out. This is a super place to relieve your stress.
Welcome to the family Midge! your feelings are familiar to most of us here. The two biggies I can think of to help you patience is to #1`lighten you load and get some respite time. And #2 perhaps consider talking to your doctor about medication to help you through these difficult stages. Just talking to others who truly understand has been a huge help to me. As Bak said, we are here for you ((hugs))
Glad you are here, Midge, to help paddle our canoe down the river of Alz. We are all here to help each other. Just take a deep breath when you feel like losing it. Acceot help when it is offered. Try to get as much rest as possible. Housework will always be there. Come visit us when possible and tell us more about your situation.
I just joined this blog recently, and it is really helping. Honestly, at first I was not so sure. The first couple of days I posted here I could not stop crying, it seemed like maybe it was really bringing things up. I think it just made me face the reality, and by reading what these other men and women go through, and the solutions and warmth and understanding, is really sinking in now.
And not only that, if there is just about ANYTHING you need to know, just type it in the search feature.
I hope you find some comfort, peace, and solutions in this difficult path we walk.
There is no doubt this disease and all that it entails from figuring out the financial ways to survive it to the decline we see as the full time caregivers, to the frustration we have trying to get our families to get their heads around this disease to holding our tempers when well meaning friends offer foolish suggestions on how to keep repeating until they finally learn...that has to be my favorite...and had another go around with that one today...until the light finally went on with my friend that yep she does not live with the endless questions over and over....if we did not have this sanctuary to come visit where we chat with those who really understand and are at different stages of this journey from whom we can learn techniques...we would surely go mad, stark raving mad. You are in very good company with this group and you will soon meet some of our in house comics..yes we even manage some good ol belly laughs here....so welcome to our playpen!
Welcome Midge. Your among friends here that really understand what your going through..being here has helped me a lot. I hope you find it the same and are comforted by the sharing and caring for each other.
welcome midge. all of us here understand the trying times and lack of patience. its a good thing to have a place to sound off and if you need a pat on the back or help during this horrible journey.
Welcome to my website, which I started in 2007, because I needed a place that dealt with my unique issues as a spouse of an Alzheimer patient. It is now a place of comfort for spouses/partners who are trying to cope with the Alzheimer's/dementia of their husband/wife/partner. The issues we face in dealing with a spouse/partner with this disease are so different from the issues faced by children and grandchildren caregivers. We discuss all of those issues here - loss of intimacy; social contact; conversation; anger; resentment; stress; and pain of living with the stranger that Alzheimer's Disease has put in place of our beloved spouse/partner.
The message boards are only part of this website. Please be sure to log onto the home page - www.thealzheimerspouse.com - and read all of the resources on the left side. I recommend starting with "Newly Diagnosed/New Member" and "Understanding the Dementia Experience". If it applies to you and your spouse, there are 4 sections for EOAD (early onset AD- now called YOUNG onset)members - two of which focus on the young teens whose parents have EOAD There is a great section on informative videos, and another excellent resource - Early Onset Dementia - A Practical Guide. You can go to the top of this page, click on "search", and type in EOAD, making sure the "topic" circle is filled in. All of the EOAD discussions will come up - there are about a dozen of them.
Do not miss the "previous blog" section, also on the left side. It is there you will find a huge array of topics with which you can relate. There is a "search" feature on the home page that allows you to look up different topics that may have been explored in a previous blog. Log onto the home page daily for new blogs; news updates; important information.
When you feel comfortable, please tell us more about you and your spouse.
Midge: dittos here to the above comments. New here too. Was aprehensive at first but these fine people are battle tested, strong, weary and most of all caring. As to your point. Patience is at the top of my challenges. (7 years into early onset for my wife) Was never given to tantrums myself but now they are part of me. I try so hard to be as sweet as she is to me but sometimes I just crash. What do I do to have more patience? First I look at her and remind myself its not her fault and how terrifying this could be to me. I also try to look at myself from outside myself as if watching a movie. How would it appear when I become frustrated, enough to bring my Barbara to tears. Too much of this only results in guilt for me. I try, I try, "we try", "we try", "we try". Just know that you are good and loving and normal. END
Welcome Midge, so glad you found us! My hubs has EOAD, and believe me, patience was something I had to learn. Surprisingly, the longer you are in your journey, it comes. I don't know when it happened for me, but it did happen. Hang in here, it will come to you as well. In the meantime, just come here and vent all you'd like!
Midge, welcome to our virtual support group. We are here 24/7 for you. So come back often. As everyone else said, we understand. Soolow, I thought I was a patient person………..until this came along. (or maybe I used up all my patience when my kids were little). Today has been an exercise in patience, and I am not doing too well. If you bottle some patience please send some to me.Thanks!
Glad you found us Midge. We hope you will ask questions and let us know what your needs are. We can't be physically with you but we can still give you ((((hugs))))