After a fairly normal day FD last night decided there was a tick on his stomach. While shaving he called me to come get the tick off his stomach. We live in the south and ticks are common and he does stay outside almost all day so I thought there probably was one. But it turned out to be a small red colored mole next to another red colored mole. He's had these for years and I reminded him that was the same one. He was sure it was a tick and I couldn't convince him otherwise. He kept scratching the mole and I told him it wasn't a tick and to stop scratching. He became more and more agitated and said well I'll just get it off after you leave. I tried changing the subject but couldn't distract him so I just left the room. I haven't seen the place today to see what he may have done to this mole. I guess it just wasn't a good day for him he told me that the nose spray he uses to control drooling wasn't any good. Turns out he was trying to use an empty one not the new one we just picked up at the pharmacy. All this at bedtime. So another day ends........

Being creative on the spot isn't easy and exhausting to do. It all depends on what you think you can sell i.e. I have a special savy I can put on it to draw the tick out, it kills the tick instantly but I need to put a bandaide over it to catch the dead tick. I always find agreeing and acknowledging works until I get tired then forgetabout it ...then I am agreeing and acknowledging while grinding my teeth, that's why I am on my second nightguard :)

This was about 11 p.m. when FD discovered the "tick". I have a 90 yr. old sister living in Assisted Living that I am responsible for. She has aphasia so our conversations sometimes are pretty funny. Fortunately she has fairly good reasoning but then at other times I feel like I'm living the the twilight zone. Also 44 yr old bi-polar (she reminds me daily) daughter whose mood swings are as predictable as the Okla. weather. (not reliable). Not complaining - much. Just tired and want my good life back. Ain't gonna happen!

God help us all. After a bad afternoon, I decided that we would walk to the coffee shop. They all know us there and are so kind. Gord was playing with the plate on which his doughnut had been. I moved it out of his reach. He took it back and asked me if I would like to eat it. I had been looking at him sadly thinking of all he had lost and how much he had changed. The sudden change hit me hard and the tears started. Suddenly he wanted to know what was the matter. I told him and of course, he had not done that and as usual he was off with his strange new language. Then he started to sob and wail. We left the coffee shop quickly. I almost dragged him home crying and wailng. What amazes me is that mid-wail, he can say something in a completely normal voice and then he is back to crying, wailing and sniffling. From your posts, you all seem to be far more patient and kind than I am. Sometimes, I am mean and I hate myself. Bak is right. Our life before was certainly not the best but this is Hell.

I try not to cry in front of him but one minute I was feeling so sorry for him and the next, he is threatening me. I made the tears come and took a minute to stop them. I am so glad that somebody feels the same way as I do.

That already happens most times Emily. I am always startled when he notices.