I went to the nursing home with my family doctor to see dh. The nursing home doctor would never give me the time of day. Thank god for my wonderful doctor. He met me there and looked at dh. He was his patient 10 months ago before he went to the nursing home. He looked at dh and was shocked at how he changed. I said to him, look at his eyes. They look so funny and cloudy. The doctor said, Paula, his eyes are empty. My heart sank. we went outside and sat down and he started to ask me questions. What would my husband want . I said, he would never want to live like this. The doctor said, I agree with you. I would like to call in a wonderful woman for Hospice. My heart sank again. I didn't think it could be worse than what I have been going through. This to me is a horrible road to it being final. I am so lost now. At least I could see his face every wee , but now I only think of How Long .
Paula, I am so very sorry. I am however glad to hear that you have one of those rare doctors who takes the time to visit your DH and takes the time to compassionately try to help you. Since being placed there were two times I thought I was going to lose Lynn, I remember well the pain and fear that I felt....... I have had some wonderful experiences with hospice; I hope they are able to help you and your husband. Write me anytime Paula... ((Big hugs))
paula i am sorry to hear your DH is declining. the empty look, well we have all said how obvious it becomes in latter stages, you can almost see the soul thru those empty sockets. but as you become more involved with hospice you will see how invaluable their services become to your DH as well as yourself. it is horrible, as we go from one terrible time to another, but we have to keep in mind that our spouses probably would make these hard decisions for themselves if they could. divvi
Paula-I think that empty look in the eyes is the most terrible part of the disease. It's like the body is still here but the soul already gone. Hospice should be wonderful.
Paula, it was great to correspond with you last night :) I hope today finds your heart a little more peaceful. The lost look in Lynn's eyes, that about killed me. I will try to figure out how to send you the videos tonight. Write anytime, and please keep us posted as to what Hospice tells you. ((Big hugs))
You have helped me Nikki. Even though Hospice is coming in, you said that doesn't mean the end. I guess I will leave it in their hands. I just don't know anymore, and I really want him to be at peace what ever happens.
He will be evaluated and they will help you through these difficult times. I think all any of us truly want is to give the best quality care and keep them as peaceful and happy as possible. You are doing wonderful Paula, deep breaths and one moment at a time ♥
Paula I am so sorry to read this. I can't imagine what you are going thru yet but please know you are not alone. I can understand how this could be the hardest time yet,,,, the having to learn how to say goodbye but not wanting to let go. I am so praying for you and your dh......take care