For the past few weeks DH has been asking me if we are married. When I say yes, he then will remember that my Dad (a minister) performed the ceremony.
Today we were driving out to lunch and he said,"I love you so much, why don't we get married". When I told him we were married, he got his wallet out and started to hand me a $20, and said, "Well, then I want to give you some money to go buy yourself something special." I took the $20, thanked him and told him I would. On the way home, he asked how long we have been married - told him 37 years and he just shook his head. Don't know if that was good or bad! LOL
I'm going to make a copy of our marriage license and give it to him if he brings it up again. Don't know if that will ease his mind or not, but can't hurt, I don't think. He had told me some time ago that he wanted to be sure we were married so there wouldn't "be any problems down the road." Gotta love him!
Vickie, Congratulations ....again! At least he knows how much he loves you, which is priceless and a wonderful gift. We're not there yet (he still knows me and that I'm his wife) but I know I will be very sad the day it happens. Not sure if the marriage license will help but it's worth a try. After almost 27 years I don't know where our is, so kudos to you being able to find it after 37!
LFL, you might want to look around for your marriage license. I ‘m not sure if you will ever need it for proof of marriage for anything legal, but I needed ours when I went to VA to fill out their paperwork. (Thank goodness I found it!)
Hate to put a damper on things...so I won't but just in case there are some spouses out there that are not as fortunate I just had a "conversation" with my DH and asked him if he knew if I was his wife and he said yes and then I asked him if he knew what a wife was and he said "No" I don't even know if he still loves me at all and I am sure that is what is part of my problem. I have, in my own feelings, already lost my husband. Don't get me wrong, I am happy for you and that is very romantic that he would feel that way Vickie. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything here because I am really glad for you but I am just haveing a bad day "again". Sorry!
MarilynMD, he won't remember it all tomorrow - or even tonight.
deb, don't feel bad about what you said. It was not a "romantic" moment. I'm not sure he knows what a wife is either. I'm sure he did feel he loved me AT THAT MOMENT - but, again, may not remember it later.
I posted it as sort of an "alrighty moment".
deb, I'm so sorry you are down. We are here to pull you up. Hang on that rope - I just put another knot in it! Hugs....
This weekend, DH and I were visiting with a couple that visit from time to time. What a godsend when then come to stay for a day or two. She asked me what day our anniversity is in June. this is number 35 for us. I said the 6th or the 7th. DH spoke up and reminded me that it was the 5th.
Vickie, I think that what your DH said was so precious.
Gotta make a copy of the marriage license. Just walked by him and he said: " Now are we married?" I said yes. He said, "And are you now a Thompson"? I said yes. He said, "that's all I wanted to know."
Vickie, It's Joyce43 writing under Joe's name, it's easier than to keep changing who signs in. It's a great feeling when they say something like that. DH questioned who I was for four years and had no idea the last two years. My thing was even if he didn't know me, I wanted him to like me and trust me, and I think he did. When he ask if we were married, I would show him a wedding picture because he recognized himself in the picture. He would always ask if the girl was me and when I said yes he'd always say, "I'm glad ". I know it always made me feel good when he said that.
Thank you for that, Joyce43. Lately, he has not recognized himself in pictures or anyone really, other than me and my deceased son.
He just brought it up again, but asked me if this was the ALZ making him forget important things! I talked to him a bit about it and tried to calm him and let him know it didn't matter, that I would always be here for him. I did ask if he knew who I was and he said, yes, Vickie Thompson. So I said, yes, VT, your wife. He was satisfied and turned over and went to sleep.
Good to hear from you, Joyce. Say hello to TJ! I'm so happy for you two!
aww. vickie its sounding as though hes trying to sound it out loud who and the relationships are to verify them. maybe a small copy of a pic of the two of you for him to carry around and look at would refresh his memory? get one of those acrylic small frames so it wont break and let him carry it around. i did this with my DH to show we were married and it thrilled him and if i had a dollar for everytime he looked at the pic and talked to it i'd be rich by now.. :) he still likes to look at pics even in his hospice bed. divvi
Vickie, What a wonderful story! Thanks for sharing that - it put a big smile on my face :) And what a wonderful testimony to your caregiving - that he wants to marry you!
When my husband was told to eliminate stress in his life - I was afraid I'd be the first thing thrown overboard! :)
Since the day we were married ours has been framed and displayed with pictures of us on "our wall". Lynn spent a great deal of time gazing at the pictures and the license, I think it brought him comfort. Maybe you could display yours where your husband can see it daily?